Quantcast
Channel: Mandatory
Viewing all 11431 articles
Browse latest View live

Burglar Arrested After Leaving His 'Salesperson of the Month' Award at Crime Scene

$
0
0
Alfred Shropshire was apparently one hell of a car salesman at one point in his life, but he's probably one of the worst thieves of all-time.
Burglar leaves salesperson of the month award at crime scene
According to KOMO, Shropshire was arrested and charged with residential burglary after stealing a purse and coin box from a Lakewood, Washington home last week.

Local police were able to apprehend the 49-year-old former "Salesperson of the Month" at South Tacoma Mazda quite easily after Shropshire left - of all things - his award plaque at the crime scene. Even crazier, Shropshire hasn't worked at the Mazda dealership since he quit in January.

The woman who owns the house told police she was inside and asleep at the time of the robbery, but the burglar tapped her on the shoulder before walking out of her home. Shropshire was already under Department of Corrections monitoring before the burglary, and he told his DOC officer that the woman invited him to sleep in her house in the middle of the night after his friends who lived nearby weren't home.

Police didn't buy the story and arrested him after he admitted to owning the plaque.

Given the fact that Shropshire was still carrying around his award five months after he quit his job, we'll assume the rest of his life has been a major disappointment.

You think that's bad, here's a salesman who eats human toes: Shoe Salesman Gets 5 1/2 Years Behind Bars For Biting Off Toes

 

Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments


18 Excellent Soccer Fail GIFs

NBA Players Reading 'Mean Tweets' About Themselves Is Absolute Hilarity

$
0
0
Jimmy Fallon and Jimmy Kimmel have really taken late night TV to a new level thanks to recurring sketches and videos combined with the fact that David Letterman hasn't been funny since 1991.

During a special "Jimmy Kimmel Live!" last night, the recurring segment known as "Mean Tweets" - when usually movie stars and entertainers read negative tweets about themselves - went NBA-style to coincide with Game 5 of the NBA Finals.

While most players just read the tweets and then looked into the camera, there are several instances of players dishing out hysterical comebacks, flipping off the camera and even acknowledging that what was said about them was actually true.


Our vote for favorite clip goes to DeMarcus Cousins reading the tweet that refers to him as an emotional lesbian, with Dikembe Mutombo acknowledging it's funny that he sounds like Cookie Monster coming in a close second.

Watch these celebrities' egos take a temporary hit: Jimmy Kimmel Brought Back 'Celebrities Read Mean Tweets' and it was Glorious

 

Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments

If 'Seinfeld' Were A Facebook Newsfeed: Part 2

California Man Uses Fake Gun to Rob Real Gun Store

$
0
0
If scientists or health officials are looking for a man with testicles the size of watermelons, I believe this guy fits the bill.
fake gun used to rob real gun store
According to NBC San Diego, a man and two teens robbed a gun store in El Cajon Friday afternoon while using a replica gun.

Police said one of the suspects held a store employee at fake gunpoint while the other two smashed glass cases with a hammer and made off with real handguns. All three embarrassingly fled the scene in a red 1998 Chevrolet Lumina.

Robert Foster, a friend of the gun store's owner, witnessed the suspects leave the store and run down an alley to their crappy car. He quickly called 911, and police were able to box in the vehicle several minutes later when they turned into a dead end.

A search of the vehicle yielded the stolen handguns as well as the fake gun and masks, and all three suspects were arrested and charged with felony armed robbery and conspiracy to commit armed robbery.

No word if the shaken gun store owner immediately went to the liquor store next door and bought everything they had.

The owner wasn't wearing a helmet cam, but we imagine it was almost as intense as this: Helmet Cam Captures Canadian Couple Being Robbed at Gun Point in Guatemala

 

Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments

Emily Sears Loves LA, and We Love Her

Mandatory is Headed to the World Cup!

$
0
0
This week, my colleague Gary Dudak and I will be Brazil bound to take in a bit of what the World Cup has to offer. We will be cheering on and covering the U.S. Men's National Team - as well as our other sure-to-be-hilarious adventures in Brazil - in real time via our Twitter and Vine accounts.

To kick things off and get ready for the trip, we decided to go around the office and give people red cards for what we felt were clear violations of proper office conduct.

Stay tuned for more from Brazil...

For more U.S. Soccer coverage, visit DegreeSoccer.com and #DOMORE.








 

Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments

Former Miss Universe Alicia Machado Shows Us What She's Got


Today's Funny Photos

10 Incredible Indie Films Streaming Now on Netflix

12 Funny Coffee Mugs to Brighten Up Your Morning

$
0
0
Most of us can't start our day without a cup (or three) of coffee. Sometimes we also need a little cheering up. These 12 mugs can kill two birds with one stone, as they'll provide your cup of joe and put a smile on your face at the same time.

funny coffee mugs, chair spins coffee mug
funny coffee mugs, i give 100% at work mug
funny coffee mugs, people are like a slinky mug
funny coffee mugs, coffee is for closers mug
funny coffee mugs, toilet coffee mug
funny coffee mugs, coffee because crack isn't allowed at work mug
funny coffee mugs, shh almost now you may speak mug
funny coffee mugs, coffee mug donut holder
funny coffee mugs, jesus saves soccer mug
funny coffee mugs, gameboy coffee mug
funny coffee mugs, i pooped today mug
funny coffee mugs, guy shitting mug
h/t CafePress and Zazzle

 

Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments

Brian Williams Raps "Baby Got Back" On The Tonight Show

$
0
0


Thanks to The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, we've seen NBC Nightly News anchor Brian Williams rap before. Now B Dubs (as I like to call him) is back with another rousing rap, this time getting spliced together reciting the lyrics to the 1992 Sir Mix-a-Lot classic, "Baby Got Back." Shout out to the special news ladies of NBC, who show up for some very important backing vocals towards the end.

 

Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments

A Bunch of GIFs and Photos That Prove Cats and Dogs Can Get Along

Utah Woman Arrested After Attacking Neighbor With Samurai Sword

$
0
0
To say she overreacted when he asked her to quiet down is a bigger understatement than saying Melissa McCarthy likes to eat.

According to FOX 13, a 25-year-old Salt Lake City woman was arrested on Sunday and charged with attempted murder after she allegedly attacked her neighbor with - of all things - a Samurai sword.
utah woman attacks neighbor with samurai sword


56-year-old Barney Salazar said Natasha Davis charged at him with the 27-inch Samurai sword while his granddaughter looked on. Davis swung the sword at Salazar numerous times and only stopped swinging after her boyfriend restrained her.

Salazar was able to block one of the swipes with his forearm, and it left a three-inch gash that required ten stitches. He was obviously upset about the whole ordeal.

"She came running down and said, 'You wanna go, Barney?' I noticed she had a big Samurai sword," he told reporters. "I was very mad when I seen her come out like that. With my granddaughter right there, that's what really upset me."

Davis is being held without bail after the shocking incident. Even more shocking? You guessed it: the fact that she has a boyfriend.

Believe it or not, a Samurai sword is not the craziest weapon we've seen this year: New Mexico Woman Arrested for Beating Her Mom With a Vibrator

 

Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments

The Terrifying Killer Clown Scare Prank Is Back For Another Go Round

$
0
0

The crew over at DM Pranks are back to make sure you can't sleep tonight. If you missed their first edition of this twisted killer clown prank, it's worth checking out. However, they've gone ahead and scared the crap out of a whole new slew of unsuspecting victims all over again for our amusement and for those who might have missed it the first time. This time, along with the now classic dummy rigged with a head that shoots blood everywhere the minute the clown smashes it, they've added a chainsaw, pyromania, and a creepy music box to the mix.

Sit back and enjoy. And then be terrified whenever you're walking around any parking lot corners in the near future.

 

Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments


10 Dumb Criminals Who Took Selfies During a Crime

Illinois Nuns File Lawsuit Against Strip Club Next Door

$
0
0
The Sisters of St. Charles in Stone Park, Illinois are apparently having trouble praying while the girls next door at Club Allure Chicago are shaking their asses to the latest ditty from Drake.
nuns are suing strip club next door
According to Huffington Post, the convent filed a lawsuit against the strip club and the village of Stone Park on Friday, arguing the club violates the Illinois zoning laws that require a "1,000-foot buffer between adult entertainment facilities and places of worship."

The sisters argue that their sacred space has been invaded. According to the lawsuit, they have seen "public violence, drunkenness, and litter, including empty whiskey and beer bottles, discarded contraceptive packages and products, and even used condoms."

The strip club argues they have done nothing wrong, and said they are not a nuisance to the nuns. Plus, none of the sisters' complaints are backed up by police reports.

However, there was no mention of the donation plates coming up a bit on the short side since the strip club went up last September or complaints of the dollar bills that were donated smelling like a combination of cotton candy and shame.

Suing strippers is becoming almost as trendy as Justin Bieber hate mail: Texas Man Suing Stripper to Get His Money Back

 

Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments

Miss Nevada Doesn't Know the Capital of...NEVADA

$
0
0
You might remember Nia Sanchez as the smoking hottie who won the Miss USA beauty pageant while representing the state of Nevada.

But now you're probably going to remember her as the smoking hottie buffoon who didn't know the capital of her home* state.

Miss Nevada doesn't know capital of Nevada
According to US Magazine, Sanchez was a guest on The Todd Show on 95.5 WPLJ in New York Monday morning and was asked to participate in a quick quiz about the pageant and the state of Nevada. But when the host asked her to name the capital of Nevada, Sanchez drew a blank.

"Oh, um, ah, oh my gosh," Sanchez said as she stumbled through what should have been one of the easiest questions for a resident* of Nevada.

Luckily for Sanchez, the host put her out of her temporary misery and gave her the correct answer: Carson City.

"Thank you, I was going to say that!" Sanchez replied. "I was like, that one DJ host on MTV, back in the day, his name, that's how I always remembered it. Carson Daly, that guy!"

*Sanchez's victory tour has been anything but a parade since winning the crown on June 9. Almost immediately, accusations surfaced that she wasn't even a resident of Nevada and that she competed for the title of Miss California from 2010 to 2012.

Regardless of what happens, Sanchez should be OK since she's very hot.

Our favorite is still Miss Alabama, though: Katherine Webb is the Best Part of the BCS Championship Game

 

Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments

Elizabeth Marxs and Ali Rose Do Things We Only Dream of Together

$
0
0

Elizabeth Marxs and Ali Rose aren't just posing for Playboy in their latest Cybergirls video. They're straight up loving on each other in an automotive garage, starting out in mechanic jumpers before stripping each other down to their sexy unmentionables. Elizabeth Marxs was recently named Playboy's Cybergirl of the Year 2014. It's reasons like this Playboy remains such a permanent fixture in most men's lives, whether married or not, and even then on after we die. If you think that's rigor mortis down there, you're dead wrong. That's simply our love for babes. And thanks to these lovely dark-haired mamas, our love of auto garages and black silky tops have multiplied exponentially as well.

 

Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments

You, Me and Kiki Morris

Viewing all 11431 articles
Browse latest View live




Latest Images