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Here's What It Looks Like When You Mistake Builder's Foam For Hair Mousse

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We're pretty sure that when Elvis Presley sang about a hard-headed woman, he meant something totally different than this.

According to the Daily Mail, a woman thought to be sitting in a hospital in Eastern Europe found out the hard way (literally) that builder's foam does not double as hair mousse these days.

woman uses builder's foam for hair mousse
Yup, this woman reportedly told the hospital staff that she mistakenly used the builder's foam because she thought it was some kind of hair product.

But the fact that there are sticks and leaves mixed in there as well as a crap ton of it caked on her left arm leads us to believe that there's more to the story, like she was perhaps being chased outside as part of an argument gone wrong or maybe somebody in makeup on the set of the Eastern European version of "John Adams" was forced to get a little too creative because there was zero budget.

Either way, keep this one tucked away for the next time your girlfriend is whining about her bad hair day as a reminder that it can always be worse.

Hey, at least her friends didn't glue their pubes to her face: Friends Glue Their Pubic Hair To Man's Face On His Bachelor Party

 

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Hip Dude Holding Cat Asked The Internet To Draw Him And The Results Were Amazing

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My drawing talents have still not exceeded stick figures, so I'm always slightly jealous anytime I meet someone who can actually draw and make things look the way they are supposed to look. And while there are many untalented, awful humans that reside on the Internet, there are also quite a few folks who have some talent.

The cool dude below, who may or may not be in The Roots, submitted a photo of himself holding his cat on Reddit and ask the Internet to draw him. The results he got back were pretty incredible.

This is the original photo he submitted:



And these are the results:

Lifestyle, Guy Ask Internet To Draw Him, Guy With Cat Ask Internet To Draw Him

Lifestyle, Guy Ask Internet To Draw Him, Guy With Cat Ask Internet To Draw Him

Lifestyle, Guy Ask Internet To Draw Him, Guy With Cat Ask Internet To Draw Him

Lifestyle, Guy Ask Internet To Draw Him, Guy With Cat Ask Internet To Draw Him

Lifestyle, Guy Ask Internet To Draw Him, Guy With Cat Ask Internet To Draw Him

Lifestyle, Guy Ask Internet To Draw Him, Guy With Cat Ask Internet To Draw Him

Lifestyle, Guy Ask Internet To Draw Him, Guy With Cat Ask Internet To Draw Him

Lifestyle, Guy Ask Internet To Draw Him, Guy With Cat Ask Internet To Draw Him

Lifestyle, Guy Ask Internet To Draw Him, Guy With Cat Ask Internet To Draw Him
Good job (this time), Internet.

Via Imgur

Way better than asking the Internet to insult you: More Absolutely Brutal Internet Roasts

 

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How To Cope With Being A Chicago Bears Fan

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First of all, let me say how truly sorry I am. This is a difficult time for you and I can't imagine what you're feeling right now. You may feel hopeless, alone and abandoned, and honestly, you should. Things aren't going to get better for a while. So what can you do? Here are a few steps to help you make it through this NFL season as a Chicago Bears fan.

1. Accept That You Will Never Escape Jay Cutler
jay cutler, jay cutler sad, being a chicago bears fan
The Bears decided to pay Jay Cutler enough money to buy a small country in Southern Europe, so just accept the fact that he will be a fixture of Chicago for the rest of your foreseeable life. He's like that little girl in "The Ring" after you watch her tape. He will follow you and he will find you, but his accuracy is so bad he'll probably end up missing you completely.

2. Start Celebrating Moral Victories Instead Of Actual Wins
jared allen traded, being a chicago bears fan
Who cares if they didn't "score the most points" in a game? Matt Forte didn't bite anyone, right? That's always good. Jared Allen was traded for a few Pogs? Not a bad deal. Martellus Bennett didn't yell out the ending of "The Sixth Sense," ruining it for the handful of people who still haven't made time to watch it? Take pride in those little, but important victories!

3. Instead Of Watching The Chicago Bears, Go To The Zoo And Watch Actual Bears
grizzly bear in zoo, bear in san antonio zoo, being a chicago bears fan
You could waste hours of your time watching your Bears get pummeled and beaten on the field, or you could watch some actual bears at the zoo climb trees and eat snacks out of a trainers' hand. I guarantee that the bear who fell asleep and rolled down a shallow hill has a higher quarterback rating than Jimmy Clausen. (Photo via angelo.edu)

4. Realize What Could Be In This For YOU
bears fan claw, angry bears fan gifs
Let's be selfish for just a second. Sure, the Bears look absolutely terrible and have no depth whatsoever at quarterback, but that's good news for you. Why? Because every day you have more and more of a chance to be somewhere on the Bears' depth chart. Eventually they have to run out of professional players and will need to pull fans out of the crowd. Stay strong, because eventually you could be your very own Henry Rowengartner.

5. Watch Old Footage Of The 1985 Bears Team

Those guys were really good! Just pop in a tape of that beloved season and ignore everything else going on in the world.

6. Maybe Find Something Else To Do On Sundays?
law and order svu, law and order svu season 16
Have you ever been to a farmer's market? Maybe that'll be better than watching Matt Forte's talents be squandered each and every week. Sometimes USA will run a "Law & Order: SVU" marathon. Watching Olivia Benson chase criminals and Ice-T try to comprehend human language is certainly more entertaining than seeing your cornerbacks get burned like a female magician in 1694 Salem.

7. Remember That You Still Have The Chicago Bulls
1996 bulls, jordan pippen rodman
Remember those guys? What a dynasty they used to be, right? You had Jordan, Pippen, Horace Grant's goggles, Bill Cartwright's weird arm thing he did while shooting free throws, Rodman's antics later on and all the other classic characters. The current team is solid, as well, and you can keep hope alive that they'll become a championship caliber squad, even if that means having to cheer for Joakim Noah (who I'm fairly certain is what Splinter from "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" looked like as a human).

8. While Remembering The Bulls, Pray Earnestly For Derrick Rose's Knees (and now, his eye)
derrick rose media day 2015, derrick rose bulls cellphone
The city tried to rest on the shoulders of Jay Cutler, but since he crumbled and fell like a poorly constructed round of Jenga, that party is over. Now you have to keep holding out hope that Derrick Rose's glass bones will stay intact. Good luck, considering his ankle is also as reliable as asking your alcoholic ex-wife to pick up your kids from soccer practice.

9. Get Ready For Next Season!
jared goff, to be a chicago bears fan
It's never too early to start looking at the draft board and figuring out what collegiate star could turn this entire franchise around! With just a few key pieces this team could go from the bottom of the division to...slightly higher than the bottom of the division.

10. Remember That It Could Always Be Worse
chip kelly, chip kelly eagles
Your team could be run by Chip Kelly.

 

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'Do It For Denmark' Campaign Puts The Emphasis On Makin' Babies

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Spies Travel in Denmark has chosen a rather unique way of getting people to take vacations. Highlighting Denmark's low birth rate, they simply point out that keeping yourself active on holiday increases the amount of endorphins your brain releases and, hence, your sex drive. This allows for many more opportunities to make a baby, and thus, make mom happy. Because what mom doesn't want some grandchildren to spoil? With their original "Do It For Denmark" ad being such a success last year, they went ahead and tried to make lightning strike twice. Fortunately for your funny bone, they succeeded in every conceivable way.

If funny commercials are what you crave, This Rejected Southwest Airlines Commercial Is Better Than Any Of Their Real Ads

 

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Are You The Parent Of A Troublesome Toddler? Give Their Teacher A Fitting Apology Gift

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Sometimes the best way to tell a teacher that you are sorry for your child's behavior is with a little dose of humor. Of course, alcohol is another great option. Reddit user martyz posted the perfect way to combine the two strategies with a little help from the website Personal Wine, which you can check out below.

bad kid teacher gift wine, bad kid wine label
Let this be a lesson to all of you: if you are going to drive someone to drink, at least provide the booze.

(via Someecards)

Speaking of awesome gifts: Girlfriend Gives Boyfriend Greatest Coupon Book Ever As An Anniversary Gift

 

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It's Going to Be an Awesome Autumn With Ana Cheri

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Ana Cheri is giving us an awesome start to autumn as she unveils some of her Miss October spread with Playboy. This fitness guru and all-around wildflower gives us a taste of fall with some outdoorsy shots, see-through gowns and bright colors. You don't have to go outside to see pretty things this fall. And as for Miss October 2015, we'll give you some more of the Ana Cheri you need, if you weren't smart enough to click the link above yet.

 

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12 Actors Who've Never Won An Emmy But Should Have

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There were plenty of Emmy nomination snubs earlier this summer, and it got us thinking about all the other TV greats who have been overlooked time and time again. Some of them have been nominated on several occasions without winning, while others have simply never been recognized in the slightest. Here's hoping the bozos who make these decisions read this and give some love to the actors who have never won Emmys but certainly deserve one. You know, the Jon Hamm treatment.

Ed O'Neill, Modern Family & Married... with Children
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy
Between his role as the misogynist Al Bundy on "Married... with Children" and head of the household Jay Pritchett on "Modern Family," you'd think Ed O'Neill would be swimming in Emmy trophies. But his shelf is actually quite barren. He has won a few Screen Actors Guild Awards, but none of his Emmy or Golden Globe nominations have panned out.

Lizzy Caplan, Masters of Sex
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy, lizzy caplan
A beautiful, talented actress on a show purely about sex can't win an Emmy? What's wrong with this picture? Lizzy Caplan was nominated in 2014 for her portrayal of Virginia Johnson on the Showtime series "Masters of Sex," but nothing else.

Steve Carell, The Office
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy, steve carell
Captain of a classic comedy ship known as "The Office," Steve Carell managed to end his run without a single Emmy award to his name. The first of the popular American mockumentaries, this series rose and set with Carell, yet he never got proper recognition for his work despite being directly responsible for the show's success.

Noel Fisher, Shameless
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy, noel fisher
Probably the biggest snub in the male drama field goes to the role of Mickey Milkovich on Showtime's "Shameless." Noel Fisher plays a hard-ass homosexual who slowly grows more compassionate with each season, yet he's without a single nomination.

Emmy Rossum, Shameless
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy, emmy rossum
The entire cast of "Shameless" is Emmy worthy, from the veteran William H. Macy to the modern day James Dean, Jeremy Allen White. But the fact that the show's real centerpiece has gone five seasons without an Emmy is beyond understandable. The winner of many awards and nominations over the last 15 years in both acting and musical performance, Emmy Rossum is yet to get her due for the role of Fiona Gallagher.

Jerry Seinfeld, Seinfeld
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy, jerry seinfeld
He may not be the greatest actor, but Jerry Seinfeld sold us more laughs than any comedian in his day. Despite a handful of nominations and the series winning Outstanding Comedy in the past, Seinfeld still went without an Emmy for himself. His costar Jason Alexander also never got his Emmy due for his classic supporting role as the dysfunctional George Costanza. Maybe these "Seinfeld" quotes will make you feel better.

Andrew Lincoln, The Walking Dead
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy, andrew lincoln
Having won a number of awards for his theatrical and television performances, Andrew Lincoln has also been highlighted for a number of nominations for his role as Rick on the AMC zombie drama - should we coin "zomba" or "drambie?" - without a single Emmy nomination. Well, if Jon Hamm can finally get his like we mentioned, maybe so can Lincoln. With "Fear the Walking Dead" just starting, we think he's got time.

Charlie Hunnam, Sons of Anarchy
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy, charlie hunnam
In the one role he was built to play, Charlie Hunnam went from kindhearted VP of his motorcycle club to the area's most dangerous outlaw. The character development -- albeit some cheesy dialogue and slips of the accent -- was impressive across a seven season arc, ending with some strong final performances, for which the show earned some of its highest ratings. Yet, despite his large female fan base and those numbers, Hunnam left television Emmy-less before moving back into film.

Joel Kinnaman, The Killing
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy, joel kinnaman
Nominated for a Saturn Award for his supporting role on the AMC-turned-Netflix detective drama "The Killing," Kinnaman is still without an Emmy nomination. He won't have one for some time, either, as his TV film is on hold while he devotes his time to movies like next year's "Suicide Squad." He'll be playing the role of Rick Flag.

Wendi McLendon-Covey, The Goldbergs
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy, wendi mclendon-covey
One of the funniest women currently on TV, starring on one of its funniest underrated shows, Wendi McLendon-Covey is without an Emmy nom for her role as the overbearing, semi-sociopathic Mrs. Goldberg. The comedy is now in its third season, mind you.

Dominic West, The Affair
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy, dominic west
Former big name on "The Wire," Dominic West has become the lead on Showtime's other sexual takeover "The Affair," though he's without an Emmy for either show thus far. Ruth Wilson, however, was nominated for her role in the show's first season. At times it's hard to tell if West is a bad actor, or if that means he's just that good. Season Two is set to be one of the best returning fall shows, so be sure to check out.

Michael C. Hall, Dexter & Six Feet Under
12 actors who should have won an emmy, actors who never won an emmy, michael c hall
With more than a handful of nominations between playing a homosexual funeral embalmer on one show and the guy killing folks on another, Michael C. Hall won only a Golden Globe in 2010 for "Dexter" when it was in its prime. Emmys, however, have eluded him throughout his acting career. Then again, maybe that atrocious Dexter finale letdown erased any hope of him ever getting one.

 

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Today's Funny Photos


The Weekly Mandatory Meme Contest Winners: The Bear Minimum

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Yesterday we asked you to use our meme generator to create some hilarious memes to unleash on the Internet. There were a lot of entries, but we managed to narrow it down to these fine and deserving winners. Congratulations, you truly understand what the Internet is all about. And to those of you who lost...oh well, there's always next week!

Speaking of which, get a head start and create a new meme for next week's contest right here.

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: thornmonkey

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: Jim N. Eye

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: ZestfulFIbre

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: Bryan Simmons

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: Joel

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: baRt

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: the beer samurai

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: Mr joshua

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: Maya

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: Big Bill

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: Marty brewer

weekly meme contest, meme contest winners
Submitted by: Paul Mason

 

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Chrissy Teigen's Twitter Account Will Make You Like Her More Than You Already Do

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Chrissy Teigen is a super-duper model who has appeared on the cover of the "Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue," color commentates on "Lip Sync Battle" and currently hosts the show "FabLife." She's also married to the giant megastar John Legend. When she's not busy being way more successful than the rest of us, she spends most of her time tweeting awesome stuff that makes us like her even more. Here are some of the best tweets Teigen could cram into 140 characters.

chrissy teigen bikini




chrissy teigen cleavage


chrissy teigen bikini


chrissy teigen twitter







 

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North Carolina Woman Tapes Dog's Mouth Shut, Posts Pictures On Facebook

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One of the lowest type of person there is is the one that abuses animals, and an idiot in North Carolina thought it would be funny to tape her dog's mouth shut in order to keep it from barking.

News, Woman Tapes Her Dog's Mouth Shut, WOman Tapes Dog's Mouth's Shut And Post Pics On Facebook

Kimberly Ann Howell, a 25-year-old from Long Ferry Road, is out of jail on a $3,000 bond after she was charged with cruelty to animals as well as failing to appear for outstanding traffic charges, in what is clearly proof that she's pretty much useless.

Not only did Howell tape her dog's mouth shut, she posted pictures of it on Facebook with the caption "ha ha." Thankfully, someone reported the pictures to the Rowan Sheriff's Office. When officers arrived at Howell's residence, her boyfriend answered and he admitted he knew it wasn't a good idea. Gee, what a bright fella.

News, Woman Tapes Her Dog's Mouth Shut, WOman Tapes Dog's Mouth's Shut And Post Pics On Facebook

According to investigators, Howell said she didn't believe it was "a big deal" and that her dog was not "physically hurt." The pictures have been taken down. Although someone should put her down as well.

News, Woman Tapes Her Dog's Mouth Shut, WOman Tapes Dog's Mouth's Shut And Post Pics On Facebook

According to the police report, Howell was more upset at the backlash she received over the pictures than about what she did to her own dog.

Plenty of idiots are dog owners, so this is just another example of the wrong people owning pets.

Via WBTV

We need more dog owners like this guy: Texas Man Built A Train To Drive Rescued Dogs Around

 

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The Only Pic Of Donald Trump You Will Ever Need

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Donald Trump is all over the news nowadays, but it's mainly about him spewing hot garbage. And even with that, he's still leading the polls somehow.

But if there's one way he's going to distance himself from the other candidates even more, it's going to be by giving himself a makeover. See what Trump decided to do to shake things up:

Regardless of how you feel about Trump, you have to admit that this hairstyle suits him a lot better. Although, anything will suit him better than what he has been sporting the last two decades.

The Internet isn't done with Trump: The Very Best Of What The Internet Has Done To Donald Trump

 

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North Carolina Man Passes Out In Stadium, Steals Mascot Costume And Goes 'Ragin', Dude'

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In all seriousness, this might be the greatest thing that has ever happened in Charlotte.

According to Creative Loafing, Charlotte man Joe Gillespie says one of his "top three nights of all time" unfortunately resulted in two felony charges for breaking-and-entering and larceny after he "borrowed" the local minor league baseball team's mascot costume and wore it around town.

guy steals mascot and wears it around town
Gillespie said he and a buddy attended Beerfest on September 19 at BB&T Ballpark, which is also the home to the Charlotte Knights and their mascot Homer the Dragon. Gillespie said the last thing he remembered about that Saturday night was running upstairs to eat some barbecue, but that adventure eventually ended with him passing out in the stairwell.

Beerfest ended around 9 p.m. but nobody noticed Gillespie zonked out on the stairs, and he didn't come to until 12:30 a.m. Sunday morning. He called his buddy, who despite losing his friend had of course made his way to the local Hooters, and the two planned on meeting up.

But before Gillespie left the stadium, he walked past the mascot dressing room and was stunned to find it unlocked. Naturally, he decided to suit up and hit the town as Homer the Dragon because why the hell not?

"I walked right up into Hooters and my buddy didn't even know it was me. I was ragin', dude. I left Hooters and there was a big line at Tilt next door. I just said, 'Yo man, can I go in?' The guy said, 'No,' and I was like, 'Dude, you're not gonna let Homer the fuckin' mascot into your bar right now? Then he said I could go in. There was nobody on the dance floor. I come sliding in and start getting it. I was doing all the moves you always wanted to try but are too embarrassed to."

Gillespie's shenanigans netted him those two felony charges, but it was totally worth it because he also landed three ladies' phone numbers and "like 20 added chicks" on Facebook.

Some team has a swamp possum for a mascot: 9 Minor League Baseball Mascots You Never Knew Existed

 

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The Funniest GIFs of the Week

A Portable Pizza Pouch To Carry Around An Extra Slice Has Been Invented

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The wheel... the light bulb... Penicillin... the World Wide Web. What do all of these things have in common? All of these inventions changed the world. Now, you can add one more to that group: the Portable Pizza Pouch. And it's exactly what it sounds like.

Funny, News, Portable Pizza Pouch
Sold by Stupidiotic, the Portable Pizza Pouch allows you to store a slice of pizza and carry it around with you so you can always have some 'zza handy in case you're in the mood (which is all the time).

This important invention is described as follows:

"Just wearing this Pizza Pouch will instantly make you more popular and attractive. It's a bold (and delicious) fashion statement. Portable pizza. The best invention since delivery."

Funny, News, Portable Pizza Pouch
It will only cost you $8 to get this amazing pouch. Why give that cashier a dollar for charity when you can instead save your money for something that matters: this pouch, your appetite, and your self-worth.

Need the pouch to save a slice of this: This Is An 8,789 Calorie Pizza Because We Aren't Afraid Of Death

 

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Florida Woman Calls 911 To Complain About Her Pot Dealer

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Maybe it's just us, but $75 sounds pretty steep for weed anywhere in Florida, especially in Fort Myers.

According to WFLA, a 35-year-old Fort Myers woman recently called 911 to complain about her pot dealer shorting her some herb.

Florida woman calls 911 about pot dealer
Erin Klich thought giving her weed guy 75 bucks and getting nothing in return was worthy of a 911 call, and actually, it did result in a police response. Unfortunately for Klich, they responded to arrest her for misuse of the 911 system.

When they arrived on the scene, police said Klich was still on the phone with the emergency dispatcher but took a break to tell them about the "tragedy" that had just taken place. They handcuffed her and put her in the back of the squad car, where they later found a bag of pot wedged between the seats.

That means she had the weed on her the whole time but called 911 anyway. If you're having trouble wrapping your head around that one, don't fret. It just means that you're not an absolute moron like she is.

Yeah, 911? I'm super horny. Like crazy horny: Florida Woman Calls 911 For Sex

 

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Rich Chinese Woman Throws Wads Of Cash In Sales Girl's Face

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Wealthy Customer Throws Wads of Cash Into Sales Girl's Face

There are two possible reasons why this rich woman decided to throw wads of cash at a sales girl behind a jewelry counter: 1) the woman was so pissed off at something that was said to her that the only way she could get revenge was to throw money at the girl. Or 2) the woman loved a specific piece of jewelry so much she just had to have it, no questions asked, so she decided to buy it immediately.

I'd like to think it's reason number two, but unfortunately I think that the rich Chinese woman was just being a huge asshole, and she would be a nightmare at strip clubs.

I just wish some wealthy jerk would walk up to me and throw a bunch of money in my face. I could sure use it.

Here's something for us poor folks: How To Make A Rap With No Money Featuring Lil Dickey And Fetty Wap

 

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You'll Probably Want A Donut After Checking Out This Picture Of Niykee Heaton

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Seriously. Even if you're hyperglycemic.

Odds are you know Niykee Heaton for one of two reasons: Her absolutely breathtaking hiney that she thankfully isn't shy about posting on Instagram, or her voice that is so spectacular that she can credibly be labeled as a singer.

But after staring at the picture Heaton posted to Snapchat for over an hour, I'm fairly certain the marketing team at Dunkin' Donuts should at least entertain the thought of making sure you also know her as the new "Time to make the donuts!" girl.

I mean, hot damn:

niykee heaton snapchat donuts
On second thought, I'll have two of them. And if it's OK, I'll choose the two I want. Thanks.

h/t Barstool Sports

You'll want to crank the AC, guys: Sexy Singer Niykee Heaton Turns Up The Heat

 

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Lady Has Meltdown As Bear Destroys Her Kayak

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Black Bear Chews On Girl's Kayak

Nobody likes to have their vacation ruined, but if a bear is the responsible party, what can you really do? If this video is any indication, whining at it is one solution that doesn't work. Granted, it's funny for about the first minute, but then it just gets sad and irritating. Bottom line: if you don't want a grizzly to destroy your kayak, don't spray it with bear mace. Actually, it would probably be best to just stay out of Alaska altogether.

Related: Watch This Bear and Man Scare the Crap Out of Each Other at the Same Time

 

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Living With Your Girlfriend vs. Dating But Living Separately

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Moving in together is a huge step in any relationship. Even if you've been dating for years, there's so much that changes once you're both under the same roof. This is not to say that she's going to ruin everything, but you're both going to have to compromise on certain areas in order to survive. Here's a look at the differences between living with your girlfriend and dating but still living by yourselves.

living with your girlfriend infographic, living with your girlfriend vs living by yourself, living with girlfriend vs dating

Also check out: Expectations vs. Reality: Moving In With Your Girlfriend

 

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