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15 Things You Can Teach Yourself In A Day That Will Benefit You For The Rest Of Your Life

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Things You Can Teach Yourself in a Day That Will Benefit You For the Rest of Your Life
It can seem like a difficult task to teach yourself a new talent or skill, but it's amazing what you can do when you don't check Facebook every 27 seconds and you actually apply yourself to something. A Reddit thread asked users to share something you can teach yourself in a single day that will benefit you for the rest of your life. Here are some of the best tips, but definitely check out the thread for other great ideas.

1. Awkward Situations
When you're in a social situation you find awkward or strained, immediately make yourself comfortable. Find the best chair and kick back, whatever it takes. If you stand around awkwardly, its noticeable and makes you seem helpless and shy; if you get cozy, you appear more powerful and will enjoy the experience more regardless.


2. How to Have Your Back Scratched
Here's the best way to communicate where on your back needs to be scratched. View it as a phone's dial pad "1" being your left shoulder and "3" being your right shoulder. "0" is your butt hole... Instead of saying down, up, left, or right; say the number that you want scratched. A lot easier, and it feel like a secret code with your significant other.

Things You Can Teach Yourself in a Day That Will Benefit You For the Rest of Your Life
3. How to Clear Your Blocked Nose
Method 1: Push repeatedly with one finger the spot above the bridge of your nose [where the third eye is supposed to be]. This will move the bone of your nose and 'pop' the congestion. Method 2 [totally works 100%]: Pinch your nose closed [hold your breath as long as you can and move your head back and forward [as if nodding like mad], this causes carbon dioxide to accumulate, which is the best natural vasodilator you can get. It has helped me immensely, especially at the end of a cold, where the mucus is thick and won't budge.

4. Train Your Foot
Take your keys and drop them. Shoot your foot out to keep them from hitting the floor. They can bounce off your foot onto the floor but your foot must break their fall. Now repeat with other random, initially unbreakable, objects. Roll things off your desk or kitchen counter. Drop them from the region of your pockets. If you're brave, once you get your confidence up practice with raw eggs. Practice this over and over until you can faithfully prevent any object you drop from hitting the floor. Master this and you will most likely prevent anything you ever drop from hitting the floor with enough force to break. I did this as a game when I was very young and the skill stuck with me. To this day I don't need cases for my phones and have prevented countless items from shattering on the floor.

5. How to Properly Budget Your Money
First off, make a monthly budget. (There are plenty of sites to help you do so)
Pay your bills then pay yourself (savings/investments).
From there do this:
Get a binder for your expenses. Get those little divider things and write what your budget is for each category on each divider thing, large enough to see. (For example: $250/groceries. $100/entertainment. $50/clothes. - obviously adjusted to your needs)
Put whatever cash you have for each category in each divider pocket and keep the binder in a safe place.
When you run out of money in each divider, you're done spending money on that category for that month. This will help you save more money/pay off more debt.

Things You Can Teach Yourself in a Day That Will Benefit You For the Rest of Your Life
6. Organize Your Stuff
I learned the two-minute rule from another comment thread in Reddit a while back. If it's something I can do in under two minutes (which you can expand to five) I do it right now, instead of later.
For example, if I'll fold some laundry right now, and browse the internet for the next four hours a little less guiltily, instead of the laundry basket torturing me for four hours. Life just runs smoother this way.

7. The NATO Phonetic Alphabet
Trust me, doing phone work as much as I do and trying to give serial numbers over fuzzy, static-y connections it does wonders. You may question how this will ever help you. But the next time you're calling for tech support to some dude in another country who may or may not have complete command of the English language, you will thank me.

Plus, it takes less then 5 minutes to learn. If the five-minute qualification wasn't in place, I'd say meditation. That takes about 15 to learn and will keep your mind in good health well into your 90's and beyond.
For those interested in the NATO phonetic alphabet, read on. Essentially, it replaces letters (A, B, C, etc.) in spoken word communication with longer, unique words so the individual letters are harder to mistake. The letter signified by each word is the first sound the word makes. IE, Alpha, Bravo, Charlie would be A,B,C.
It's easy to memorize after a few runs through the alphabet. Alpha, Bravo, Charlie, Delta, Echo, Foxtrot, Golf, Hotel, India, Juliet, Kilo, Lima, Mike, November, Oscar, Papa, Quebec, Romeo, Sierra, Tango, Uniform, Victor, Whiskey, X-ray, Yankee, Zulu.

8. Public Restroom Tip
When going number 2 in a public restroom, put toilet paper in the toilet before you go. No sound. No splash.

Things You Can Teach Yourself in a Day That Will Benefit You For the Rest of Your Life
9. At Least a Single Chore Every Day
I just do one chore a day. I pick one thing that needs to be done every night when I get home from work and do it. Whether it be cleaning and organizing the entire kitchen or changing a light bulb,
It keeps me on top of things without getting overwhelmed

10. Seeing Without Your Glasses
I am slightly nearsighted. If I don't have my glasses and, for example, I need to read something on the TV but it appears blurry, I make a tiny hole with my fingers and look through it. It acts as a lens just enough for me to be able to read what's written on the TV. Blocks out a bunch of light, but otherwise it works.

11. Click Website Links Easier
Actually pressing your mouse wheel button on a link instantly opens the link in a new tab. It's incredibly helpful.

Things You Can Teach Yourself in a Day That Will Benefit You For the Rest of Your Life
12. The Secure Knot for Shoestrings
Learn how to tie your shoes using Ian's Secure Knot. Since I started tying my shoes this way many years ago, I haven't had my shoelaces come undone unintentionally. (OK, it happened once when my shoe ace got snagged on a tree root whilst hiking, but I don't count that.)

13. Easy Treats and Gifts
Buy good, pitted Dates- fat ones. Stuff them with peanut butter (chunky or smooth). Roll in powdered sugar. Put in small, decorative tin. Addictive as hell, ingredients keep forever, a 5 year old can make them and an instant gift for housewarming, baby showers, dinner invites, people dropping by on short notice, little old lady or man living next door gift, etc.

14. Life Saving CPR Techniques
For Adult CPR:
Tap the guy on the shoulders and make sure he's unconscious, then send someone to call 911 and grab an AED. Don't want to start CPR on someone who's passed out drunk or taking a nap.

Check to see if he has a pulse and is breathing. Check for a carotid pulse. When checking for breathing, listen for breath sounds at the mouth and look for chest rise and fall.
No pulse? Even if he's breathing, start compressions because without a pulse, respiration will soon stop. The ratio of compressions to breaths is 30:2.

Things You Can Teach Yourself in a Day That Will Benefit You For the Rest of Your Life
15.Positive Thoughts for Yourself
Every night, before going to sleep, write 10 good things about your day, i.e. things that make you proud or that you are grateful for, achievements you've made or situations where you acted according to your values, etc. Doing this will help you keep a positive and grounded perception of your life, and will improve your mental health greatly.
Life is hard, and depression is lurking in the corner for all of us, we need to take our time to build defenses against it. This is a not-very-expensive and simple way in which you can improve your well-being by, well, just being grateful.

And aim for these while you're at it: Average Life Goals To Strive For

 

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Thousands Of People Abandoned Their Pants For 'No Pants Subway Ride'

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This past Sunday, thousands upon thousands of people from all over the world said "adios" to their pants in order to celebrate the 15th annual No Pants Subway Ride.

The funny folks at Improv Everywhere started this pretty simple, yet effective concept that involves people riding the subway with no pants on while wearing their usual winter clothes. Check out the New York City version below:


I see a lot of people riding the subway without pants every day while yelling nonsensical things at me, so I'm kind of used to this.

Now check out some tweets from around the world of the No Pants Subway Ride:




It's nice when the world comes together.

Via Huffington Post

I don't know if this was the purpose of No Pants Subway Ride: Man Receives Oral Sex For All To See At Subway Station

 

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9 Of The Hardest Partying '90s Athletes

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Athletes — they're just like us, only better. Though perhaps not always on an ethical level. Well, unless you find hedonism ethical, which you probably should. Men of such appetites should be regaled as adventurers of spirit and spirits, who dare to face the demons and then attempt to drown them with Jack Daniel's. These nine athletes who reigned high as f--k in the '90s (and beyond), are those better men. They just needed a bump, belt or bongload to keep on being better. We salute them for their effort, and invite any of them out for a drink on us if they are indeed still alive and drinking.

John Daly
hardest partying 90s athletes, john daly
Sure, there were better pro golfers in the '90s, but no one you'd rather hit the links with. Especially not when Daly was 23 and drinking at least a fifth of Jack a day, usually while wearing neon flowered pants. Anybody who excels at hitting golf balls teed up in a woman's mouth is someone who has had too much to drink. Yes, Daly earned the right to wear the pants and the party-in-the-back 'do, but he also made golf look fun...right up until he started visibly trembling his way around the course. Just look how cool that mulletted stud looks after winning the '95 British Open with one of his early wives on his arm as a streaker darts by advertising his bum as the 19th hole. Daly made those kind of shenanigans seem OK around a stuffy golf course. Perhaps that's because he got so used to playing drunk that he couldn't really do it as well sober. Unfortunately, sobriety is kind of enforced after you get arrested for passing out in a Hooters parking lot.

Darren McCarty

Speaking of enforcing, it's odd that an enforcer of McCarty's caliber was more of a weed guy than a cokehead. But McCarty the One Man Party — aka the bane of Claude Lemieux's existence — tested positive for ganja some 30 times throughout his illustrious career. In his Pulitzer Prize finalist book entitled "My Last Fight: The True Story of a Hockey Rock Star," he describes his addictive plight: "I'm a weed and alcohol guy. But if cocaine was around, I used it, primarily as a means to sober up after being drunk. I called cocaine 'the equalizer.'" Wise words from the lead singer of heavy metal band Grinder, and the winner of Kid Rock's "Rock 'n' Roll Most Improved" award.

Vin Baker
hardest partying 90s athletes, vin baker
Back in the '90s, Vin Baker could ball to the tune of four consecutive All-Star games. Along the way, people started calling him Vin and Tonic. Eventually, he spent all of his 100 or so million dollars of earnings and ended up broke and working at Starbucks after he sobered up. Then again, he was also recruited by Dennis Rodman to conduct "basketball diplomacy" for Kim Jong-un's 30th birthday, so maybe he wasn't actually 100 percent off the sauce.

David Wells
hardest partying 90s athletes, david wells
On the eve of his perfect game in 1998, Wells only got about an hour of sleep for a day game start. But that's what happens when you play in the Bronx and stay up partying with the cast of "Saturday Night Live" into the wee hours. But hey, he showed up. "I just stayed away from everybody in the clubhouse, drank a lot of coffee, tried to mask the smell, and I think I was blowing about 4.2 at the time," said an older, wiser, still drinking David Wells in a riveting interview. No word on how many times he tried to recalibrate such a magical reaction, but I wouldn't bet against a guy who wouldn't say no to a spineful of cortisone before a start, as the description to his book, "Perfect I'm Not," can attest. It also says that 'Ol Boomer had a habit of trying to get girls in the stands to show him their knockers. Yes, I bought the book.

Dennis Rodman
hardest partying 90s athletes, dennis rodman
In the David Wells interview just discussed, somewhat incoherently, Wells compares his perfect hurl to when Rodman enjoyed one of his "greatest games" after enjoying the "after party." I can't be sure what Wells is actually referring to, but odds are pretty good that Rodman is well aware that there ain't no party like the after party, and that the after party don't stop. I think Rodman may actually think his entire post-Pistons life has been the after party. How else can you explain the boa-heavy getup above? Or "Double Team?" Or his ambassadorial efforts in North Korea? Of course, he did blame the drinking when that diplomacy thing backfired. But that didn't stop the party. This year, for his 54th birthday, Rodman had a "huge porn star party" with some of the best in the biz including Katie Morgan, Tasha Reign and Teagan Presley.

Andre Agassi
hardest partying 90s athletes, andre agassi
When you start doing meth, plummet from the top of the rankings and lose a wife as hot as Brooke Shields, that's when you know you're partying too hard. But apparently Agassi had the wild streak in him all along. As a nine-year-old shark in Vegas, he hustled $500 bucks off Jim Brown by beating the Hall-of-Famer in a match. When he was a teen at the Bollettieri Academy, he "consumed gallons of whiskey" while chewing Jack Daniel's-soaked Skoal and Kodiak. By the time he first started to blow up in 1992, Agassi was so hungover during a Davis Cup match that he had to wear a pair of Oakley wrap around sunglasses to shade his bloodshot eyes. The founder of Oakley got so much business from the move, he sent Agassi a Dodge Viper in appreciation. No word on whether or not that Viper had an acid wash paint job, but whoa, that would be rad.

Charles Barkley
hardest partying 90s athletes, charles barkley
There's plenty to say about Sir Charles's brilliant buffoonery, but perhaps the story of him getting pulled over for a DUI sums it up best. First, Barkley asks the arresting officer if he saw that girl walking away. He then asks if he thought she was hot. The officer did. So Barkley bragged that he "was gonna drive around the corner and get a b**w job." He went on to further explain that he got one of the greatest BJs of his life from her the week before. None of which, surprisingly, saved him from getting arrested. Back at the cop shop, Barkley told one of the officers that in exchange for getting him out of the DUI, he'd tattoo his name on the officer's ass. But after realizing he was in the wrong, he quickly righted himself by saying that he really meant "I'll tattoo your name on my ass." Still, he didn't get out of the DUI. Sheesh, some cops have no sense of humor.

Ryan Leaf
hardest partying 90s athletes, ryan leaf
Leaf's draft partner Peyton Manning most certainly cannot be considered just a '90s athlete, since much of his greatness is still pending; Leaf's glory days were undoubtedly the ones leading up to the 1998 draft. While a few NFL teams pegged him pre-draft as a "party boy," unfortunately if you're a Bolts fan, San Diego wasn't one of them. After quickly exiting from the NFL as the league's biggest bust ever, things didn't get any better. Burglary. Controlled substance. Criminal possession of dangerous drugs. He actually got a coaching job somewhere in Texas, but got busted trying to bum prescription drugs from one of his players. He was then arrested for breaking into a player's home while looking for narcotics. Yes, Leaf's long and obnoxious party past has gotten him a rap sheet longer than Manning's entry in the NFL record book.

Bob Probert
hardest partying 90s athletes, bob probert
You don't become the Detroit Red Wings most penalized player without a little bit of rocket fuel. Well, a lot in this case. "Bruise Brother" Bob — may he rest peacefully in a big huge pile of blow — had a $42,000 a year coke habit back in the day. This couldn't have been much less than his salary at the time, seeing as goons often got paid in fake teeth and Molsen Ice back then. In 1989, Probert spent three months in the clink for smuggling 14 grams of cocaine into the U.S. from Canada, eh. International drug smuggling and only three months? Good lawyer. After Propert retired, he somehow skated assault charges which were levied after he parked his Bimmer on the side of the road, jumped out and started a fight over drugs. During which time, he had to be tasered and stun-gunned by several police officers. But Probert's lawyer wasn't done there. He later got his client off of resisting arrest and assaulting a police officer charges. Unfortunately, a heat wave and years of abuse stopped big Bob's ticker too soon. Hopefully his lawyer is still kicking ass somewhere, though.

 

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This Person Just Spoiled The New 'Star Wars' For Anyone Driving Behind

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"Star Wars: The Force Awakens" continues to reel in money as nerds continue to see it over and over again. But it's probably best that the tiny group of people who still haven't seen the biggest film ever stay away from this guy on the highway, because he's ruining the film's biggest shocker (although since I haven't seen it either, does Darth Vader return looking for 50/50 custody because that's also a big shocker?).

Oh, and heads up, there is a MASSIVE SPOILER below.


Poor Harrison Ford and his earring.

Update: This man hasn't been seen since.

h/t Deadspin

How does he move on from this: This Guy Had 'Star Wars' Ruined For Him Thanks To His Cheating Girlfriend

 

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This Might Be The Craziest Ex-Girlfriend You've Ever Seen

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You will probably stop complaining that your ex-girlfriend is writing awful things about you on Facebook after watching this.

The video below shows a Boston man filming his ex-girlfriend losing her mind and damaging his property. Everything from his car to his house feels her insane wrath. The ex-girlfriend goes even more bonkers at the 3:20 mark. Take a look.


I would like to know how this man's voice remained so calm even after he was almost murdered by a car. And something tells me I know the movie that inspired this woman...


Via Reddit

These people can relate: 14 People Share Stories About The Unbelievably Crazy Stuff Their Ex Did

 

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Tyga Might Have Cheated On Kylie Jenner With This Brazilian Bombshell

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Oh wow, Tyga might actually have other interests besides underage girls.

Since the majority of us don't really care if Tyga cheated on Kylie Jenner or not, I think it's probably best to focus on the super hot blonde that according to extremely important sources (the magazine your mom reads on the checkout line), Tyga cheated on Kylie with.

Afternoon of extravagant delight ||@thebyrdbrand || @irisesmeralda_

A photo posted by Annalu (@annaluyzacardoso) on


That's 23-year-old Brazilian model Annalu Cardoso, and I'm pretty honored to go through her Instagram to write this article. Enjoy more of Annalu and her body.

✨@ohrangutang @cristinapilo ✨

A photo posted by Annalu (@annaluyzacardoso) on


⚡️⚡️⚡️

A photo posted by Annalu (@annaluyzacardoso) on




🌴⛅️💦

A photo posted by Annalu (@annaluyzacardoso) on


All good things are wild and free ✌🏻

A photo posted by Annalu (@annaluyzacardoso) on



@ohrangutang @cristinapilo ⚡️⚡️⚡️

A photo posted by Annalu (@annaluyzacardoso) on




h/t Playboy

Related: Kylie Jenner's Hot And Wet For Her 18th Birthday

 

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Weird News: Watch This Guy Steal A Two-Foot Long Python By Shoving It Down His Pants

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Man, how big are the balls on this guy? Or how big were they?

According to BBC News, an Oregon man with stones the size of grapefruits walked into a Portland pet store last Friday and ganked a $200 black pastel ball python by grabbing it out of its tank and shoving it down his pants.


The owner of A to Z Pets said the python was one of her rarest reptiles, and she couldn't believe the manner in which the man removed it from her store.

"You`ll see him put it in his pants, yuck. Just drops it right in the front," Christin Bjugan said.

Bjugan hopes that somebody who sees the surveillance footage will recognize the thief and turn him in. Our advice for her is to check in with local hospitals for anybody who might have walked into the emergency room over the weekend asking for a doctor to remove his penis from a snake's stomach and then reattach it to his body.

​If this is what a python can do to a possum, imagine what it might have done to that thief's manhood: Watch This Python Swallow A Possom Whole Because The Circle Of Life Is An A-Hole

 

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This Girl Really, Really Enjoyed Her Boyfriend's Awkward Gag Gift

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All right, folks, here's a gal clearly enjoying the gift that her boyfriend got her for her birthday. So let's try to not overthink this because the Internet wasn't made for deep...thinkers.

So this guy thought it would be a great idea to get his girlfriend this gift for her birthday because he's a guy and we don't have non-funny gift ideas. Here she is eagerly opening the package.

See How Much This Girl Enjoyed Your Boyfriend's Awkward Gag Gift
And here she is showcasing her gift for all to see:


Here she is enjoying her gift for all of us depraved monsters to ogle:




And this seems to be a message for any guy who does her wrong:


And of course this is where you can go to get your partner one of these because Valentine's Day is around the corner:


Via Imgur

And this is a gift you gals can get your guy: Girlfriend Gives Boyfriend Greatest Coupon Book Ever As An Anniversary Gift

 

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Abigail Ratchford Gives Us A Little Mouth-To-Mouth Resuscitation

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Abigail Ratchford has many sides to her, and this Playboy exclusive lets us see all those wonderful sides up close and half naked. From bouncy boob bikini pool shoots to her "Baywatch" tribute runs on the shores of Southern California, there is no curve missed in this breathtaking video of Abigail. The only thing we're still trying to figure out is how we can get some of that mouth-to-mouth from Abigail. That is one lucky blowup doll.

More sexiness: 10 Dirty Girls To Follow On Snapchat

 

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Today's Funny Photos

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If you're looking to waste some time, you've come to the right place. Today's funny photos will keep you occupied just long enough to forget about that important e-mail you were about to send. Or pay that overdue credit card bill. Or look up as you cross through that intersection. Wait, are you driving while you're reading this? What the hell is wrong with you? Get off your damn phone. You're gonna cause an accident.

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You Won't Believe What This Year's Sex Trend For Men Is

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With the welcoming of a new year, many organizations like to predict what trends we can expect. As such, luxury sex toy manufacturer LELO has predicted the biggest sexual trend in 2016. And fortunately for us, it's all about men this year.

What you might not expect, however, is that this trend is something many men have -- up until recent years -- considered quite taboo, or at the very least something only homosexual men take part in. I'm speaking about anal sex, prostate massage, and pegging. (Pegging, in case you're unaware, is defined by Urban Dictionary as: "Anal sex reversed. Instead of the man sticking his penis up the woman's butt, the woman wears a strap-on and sticks it up the man's butt.")

The 2016 Male Sex Trend Is Anal Sex

If you're such a person who doesn't want anything remotely near your butt, it's understandable that you're disappointed by this year's trend -- but hey, on the bright side, this means that 2016 could be the year you finally get your partner to commit to anal!

Why 2016 Is All About Anal
The Biggest Male Sex Trend of 2016
As 2015 brought sexual identity and gender expression to the forefront of mainstream conversation, LELO admits they witnessed a significant shift in sex toy sales, with prostate massagers seeing a 200% sales increase, with no signs of this changing. In fact, LELO predicts as much as a 400% increase in prostate massager sales for 2016.

To substantiate their prediction, the sex toy manufacturer released a press release with the following information:

"LELO reports that anal pleasure is the most commonly enquired topic they received going into 2016, with 'which toys to use', 'which products can be shared by partners' and 'the best techniques' all making up the top three questions, with enquiries about pegging techniques on the rise as well."

A broader trend that's really driving the development of sex toys across the adult industry is the deepening understanding and knowledge of gender expressions, sexual identities and lifestyles. The language of non-binary genders and sexualities is already in place and more and more people are familiar with terms like 'non-monogamy', 'polyamorous' and 'genderqueer'. As the confines of sexual identity and gender are torn down, LELO predicts attitudes to sex will continue to evolve, for the better, as people gain confidence to explore pleasure."

Who's Currently Indulging In This Trend?

To see who is using these prostate-friendly toys already (sexual trendsetters, if you will), take a look at the infographic below to see where your city resides on the scale of anal pleasure:

The 2016 Male Sex Trend Is Anal Sex

As you'll see, New York City purchases the most prostate massagers, but Miami has most sales per capita -- with Washington coming in second. New Yorkers were also the most likely to research anal pleasure prior to purchasing, followed closely by Texans.

Some More Information You Might Like To Know
  • Are you afraid to ask your partner to experiment with this trend? Don't be. 80% of women admitted in a recent survey that they would perform a prostate massage on their partner if they were asked.
  • Don't be so closed-minded! Prostate massage is not something only gay men are into. Research discovered 71% of straight men in a relationship have tried or admitted they'd like to try prostate massage.
  • The size and intensity of an orgasm when prostate massage is incorporated can be as much as 33% bigger. And with prolonged use, men report firmer, thicker erections.
  • Prostatic fluid, which is secreted during prostate massage, is the right alkalinity needed to neutralize the acidity of the vaginal track, which allow sperm to travel to her eggs more safely as if they're travelling hand-in-hand with a crossing guard. Which is a great tip if you're trying to conceive.

How Does One Perform A Prostate Massage?

If you don't want to dirty your fingers (apologies for the visual), there are proficient toys that do a better job than your digits regarding massage. For this, LELO recommends the following devices, and urges you keep your toys clean and have plenty of lube on hand:

LOKI
The 2016 Male Sex Trend Is Anal Sex
Shaped and angled to hit the prostate, the Loki is a great prostate massager for beginners, and boasts six variable settings for reaching your best climax yet.


LOKI Wave
The 2016 Male Sex Trend Is Anal Sex
With its dual motors, the LOKI Wave offers both external (hitting the perineum, the swath of skin between your butt and balls) and internal stimulation. It is also the first sex toy to perform the expert recommended "come hither" motion for an optimal prostate orgasm.


BILLY
The 2016 Male Sex Trend Is Anal Sex
The Billy is the least intimidating model in the lineup, is the smallest in size, and is very easy to use. If you're intimidated at the prospect of prostate play, then the Billy is for you.

Related: 10 Things You Should Know Before Trying Anal Sex For The First Time

 

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10 Terrifying Things Coca-Cola Is Used For That Will Make You Rethink Your Next Can

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We've all enjoyed an ice-cold can of Coca-Cola, but what many don't know is that the sprightly, spine-tingling beverage is also used for a number of disturbing projects. Besides a potential household cleaning agent, Coke makes a handy crime scene cleanup product, among other terrifying things you'll see in this list. I bet this will make you rethink your next can.

Getting Blood Out of Concrete
The Terrifying List of 10 Things Coca Cola Is Used For That Will Make You Rethink Your Next Can
Every passed by a roadside tragedy? If you have, you may have noticed the police officer pulling a two-liter from his trunk, as Coke has been known to conveniently get the blood stains out of concrete. Nothing to see here, folks! Move along!

Rust Removal & Chrome Polisher
The Terrifying List of 10 Things Coca Cola Is Used For That Will Make You Rethink Your Next Can
Whether your car is getting rusty or your wrench set needs a quick makeover, a bit of crumpled foil dipped in Coke can be used to lift and scratch off any rust, like steel wool from hell. If your organs are feeling a little rusty, that might work, too.

Jellyfish Stings
The Terrifying List of 10 Things Coca Cola Is Used For That Will Make You Rethink Your Next Can
Known for pain relief, Coke can be used to treat a number of stingers from back pain to jellyfish stings. We still like the idea of peeing on people though, sting or otherwise.

Paint, Stain & Gum Removal

Carpet stains, unwanted paint or gum in the hair or on the bottom of your shoe, there's no limit to the capability of the acidity in the Coca Cola. Once it sets in and does its magic, you'll be stain and gum free in no time. You can also use it to clean countertops and your floors. Sounds disturbing, no? You're drinking a can right now, aren't you? Gosh, you're sick.

Pesticide & Insecticide
The Terrifying List of 10 Things Coca Cola Is Used For That Will Make You Rethink Your Next Can
The Cokey acidity sprayed on works like a bug killer to keep pests and insects from taking over your garden. If you see your mother throwing soda at the cucumbers, it's okay. She's not completely batshit crazy...not yet anyway.

Toilet Bowl & Window Cleaner

Here's a nice thought: The same thing to clean the place where you shit stain your porcelain is the same thing you use to wash down a three-topping medium that will ironically make you shit stain your porcelain. Also, homeless people tired of shelling out dough for overpriced Windex might find this useful for their mid-traffic windshield wiping scams. Fun fact: It also defrosts windshields in winter.

Bolt Loosening
The Terrifying List of 10 Things Coca Cola Is Used For That Will Make You Rethink Your Next Can
A Coke-soaked cloth covering a unwilling old bolt will do the trick, loosening its stubbornness with a bit of raw black magic and allowing you to pry its ungrateful edges into a counterclockwise ascent. If you like this bolt, you're an asshole as well.

Car Battery Corrosion Removal
The Terrifying List of 10 Things Coca Cola Is Used For That Will Make You Rethink Your Next Can
Your mechanic screwed you again when he overcharged you for sticking his head under your hood and shaking his head "no" while dreaming of greased-up car girls? No problem, as Coke, when poured on, melts car battery corrosion that he forgot to clean off right away.

Nail Disappearing Act
The Terrifying List of 10 Things Coca Cola Is Used For That Will Make You Rethink Your Next Can
Coca-Cola can be used to dissolve a nail. Yes, a nail. Coke contains phosphoric acid, and it's said that if you soak a nail in it for four days, the nail will dissolve. Yes, dissolve. Still thirsty for Coke? We sure as hell are!

Coca-Cola Delivery Truck Engine Cleaning
The Terrifying List of 10 Things Coca Cola Is Used For That Will Make You Rethink Your Next Can
Quite possibly our favorite use for Coca-Cola in this terrifying list, and quite specific, Coke is ironically and conveniently used to clean the engines and remove oil stains of the trucks that deliver the Coke itself. Even the people at Coca-Cola know how mad this is!

 

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10 People Framed By Cops For Crimes They Didn't Commit

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If you've been binge-watching Netflix's latest hit "Making A Murderer," you know that officers of the law can sometimes ignore evidence or do even worse things if they want to get somebody behind bars. Steven Avery spent 18 years in prison for a sexual assault that he didn't commit, proclaiming his innocence the whole time. Now he's back in jail for allegedly murdering Teresa Halbach, despite overwhelming concerns about the behavior of police handling the case. With that in mind, let's explore ten more stories of ordinary people who were put away by cops for crimes they didn't commit.

Donald E. Gates
10 People Framed By Cops For Crimes They Didn't Commit, Donald E Gates
Typically when the police set up a frame job, they make it for something big. Washington, D.C. native Donald Gates knows that all too well. In 1982, Gates was given a life sentence for the rape and murder of Catherine Schilling. From the prosecution's side, it seemed like a slam dunk - cops had an eyewitness and a match from an FBI hair analyst. Unfortunately, that informant was giving false testimony to get out of a felony charge and the analyst was similarly discredited. Gates was innocent, but spent the next 27 years trying to prove it. Eventually, DNA testing exonerated him and proved that the real suspect was a temp who worked in the victim's building. For his suffering, Gates was given $75 and a bus ticket to Ohio.

David Ranta
10 People Framed By Cops For Crimes They Didn't Commit, David Ranta
New York can be a wretched hive of scum and villainy, and the police department is no exception. In 1990, the shooting death of rabbi Chaskel Werzberger shocked the Hasidic community in Brooklyn, and cops quickly fingered a man named David Ranta for the crime. The investigation was led by Louis Scarcella, who had a strong reputation for closing cases, and he brought in a number of eyewitnesses who put Ranta at the scene. He served 23 years in prison before an investigation into Scarcella's methods revealed that he'd investigated a thief named Joseph Astin but dropped the lead - even after Astin's widow told cops he'd committed the murder. In addition, witnesses told cops that Scarcella had coerced their statements and told them to point Ranta specificially out in a lineup of suspects.

Anthony Caravella
10 People Framed By Cops For Crimes They Didn't Commit, Anthony Caravella
If you've watched "Making A Murderer," one of the things that probably made you the maddest was the confession by teenager Brendan Dassey, which was key to the prosecution and clearly coerced out of him. Dassey's subnormal IQ made him an easy mark for aggressive investigators, and he's not the only one. In December 1983, police in Florida tapped 15-year-old Anthony Caravella for the rape and murder of a 58-year-old woman, eventually getting him to give four separate (and contradictory) confessions. Caravella, who has an IQ of 67, was convicted almost solely on his statements (there was no physical evidence) and given life in prison. In 2009, DNA evidence cleared him and he won a $7 million settlement against the cops who put words in his mouth and cost him 26 years of his life.

Corethian Bell
10 People Framed By Cops For Crimes They Didn't Commit,  Corethian Bell
What's worse than finding the dead body of your own mother? Having police beat the hell out of you until you falsely confess to her murder. Chicago native Corethian Bell, like several of the other tragic individuals on this list, is mentally challenged, and the police held him for a staggering 50 hours, accusing him of killing her while punching him and telling him he failed a lie detector test. Bell tearfully confessed, thinking that it would cause the abuse to stop and he would have a chance to explain himself in front of a judge. That didn't happen, and he was imprisoned for 17 months until DNA evidence cleared him and implicated DeShawn Boyd, who was guilty of similar crimes.

Gary Gauger
10 People Framed By Cops For Crimes They Didn't Commit, Gary Gauger
If you've ever watched a cop show on TV, you know that the need to clear cases is an obsession. When unsolved murders start to stack up, politicians get nervous. So in 1993, when Gary Gauger called 911 to report that his mother and father were dead, the lens of justice fixed on Gary. He claimed to have been sleeping when the murders occurred, but police told him that they'd found a bloody knife in his pocket and bloody clothes in his room. Unsure of what happened, Gauger was cajoled into talking about a hypothetical situation in which he could have blacked out and murdered his parents, which was then used as an actual confession in court. He was sentenced to death, despite the lack of a single piece of physical evidence. Fortunately, his conviction was overturned in 1996 and a pair of bikers were convicted of the crime the next year.

Jaime Chavez
10 People Framed By Cops For Crimes They Didn't Commit, Jaime Chavez
Drug possession is one of the easiest frame jobs that cops know how to do. With access to evidence lockers, it's trivial to slip a baggie of an illicit substance into a suspect's pocket and "find" it at the same time. It took the case of Jaime Chavez to show just how common the practice was. Chavez was picked up by the police in Dallas in 2000 along with four other men for possession with intent to sell. The prosecution's star witness was a man named Enrique Alonzo, who claimed Chavez had brought the drugs with him. He was sentenced to 15 years in prison, but it was later discovered that Alonzo had been working with the Dallas PD on dozens of set-up drug busts, often times planting ground-up sheetrock on his victims for "cocaine." Chavez was released after almost three years in jail, and since then over 80 other victims of the scam have stepped forward.

Barry Gibbs
10 People Framed By Cops For Crimes They Didn't Commit, Barry Gibbs
The power of the police department is an irresistible lure for organized crime, and tons of crooked cops have been under the Mafia's thumb through history. One of the nastiest was Louis Eppolito, and the Barry Gibbs case is what eventually led to his undoing. In 1986, a woman's body was found by a Brooklyn highway, and Eppolito led the investigation to a man named Barry Gibbs. Eyewitness testimony and jailhouse snitches helped the state convict Gibbs of the murder, but on appeal some very strange things came to light -- much of the evidence had been "lost" or destroyed. Internal affairs started looking into the retired Eppolito and discovered that he'd been working with the Mob his whole career and had committed at least eight murders for them. The eyewitness in Gibbs's case confessed that Eppolito had threatened his family if he didn't lie in court, and justice was finally served in 2005 when Gibbs was released. Eppolito got 100 years plus life in 2009.

Kareem Torain
10 People Framed By Cops For Crimes They Didn't Commit
We're not going to defend the actions of any of the policemen implicated in this feature, but we have to give some blame to the War on Drugs as well. With cops driven to put arrests on the books, they're more likely to bend the rules to get those numbers. Kareem Torain is one of hundreds of innocent people in Philadelphia who were jailed for drug crimes they didn't commit, and he spent 13 years behind bars before being exonerated. In 2001, Torain was picked up on the street despite not having any drugs on him, and officers used his arrest to get a search warrant and then planted contraband in his apartment to charge him. He was released in 2014 and is currently suing the city after one of the arresting officers was caught stealing money from another home.

Timothy Evans
10 People Framed By Cops For Crimes They Didn't Commit, Timothy Evans
The stories we've shared so far have all had relatively happy endings, with the wrongly accused eventually released from prison to get on with their lives. This one? Not so much. When a woman is murdered, the first suspect is almost always the husband. That's why cops in Wales focused on Timothy Evans when his wife and infant daughter turned up dead in 1949. Evans gave a number of contradictory statements to police, and statements from Evans' neighbor John Christie were used to find him guilty and put him to death by hanging. Unfortunately, in 1953 it was discovered that Christie himself was a serial killer who had murdered at least six other women in the same way. Investigations revealed that police had essentially dictated Evans' confession to him, and he was given a posthumous pardon.

Sultan Alam
10 People Framed By Cops For Crimes They Didn't Commit, Sultan Alam
Let's close this out with a case involving a police officer framed by his brothers in blue. Sultan Alam was a cop in the Cleveland, UK force who found himself the target of a number of mean-spirited racial jokes. When he filed a complaint against the officers who were leading the harassment, the department retaliated by framing him for stealing auto parts, which landed him in prison for nine months. As you probably know, convicts don't take too kindly to cops behind bars, and his time in jail left him traumatized. Even though the conviction was later overturned, Alam's career was over and his marriage fell apart in the aftermath.

Related: 10 True Crime Stories Worthy Of The 'Serial' Treatment

 

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Ohio Fugitive Sends Cops Selfie Because His Mugshot Is 'Terrible'

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Looking fantastic is above everything else, at least it is to an Ohio man who is on the run from police but still took the time to send them a better looking picture of himself because he hated the way his mugshot looked.

Chris Pugh failed to show up to court in December for a DUI charge, and when a warrant was put out for his arrest the Lima Police department used a previous mugshot of Pugh. Clearly Pugh wasn't a fan of the mugshot because he sent them a better picture to use.

Ohio Fugitive Sends Cops Selfie Because His Mugshot Is 'Terrible'

"Here is a better photo that one is terrible," the bold fugitive told police.

"They had me looking like I was a Thundercat or something, man, like James Brown on the run," Pugh stated last week on 104.9 The Eagle from an undisclosed location. Ugh, I hate when I end up looking like a Thundercat. That's the worst.

The Lima police isn't exactly laughing at Pugh's vanity as aside from the DUI charge, Pugh is also a person of interest in arson and vandalism cases.

h/t GQ

This didn't end the way he hoped: Florida Burglar Mocks Cop On Facebook, Gets Caught And Trolled

 

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The Best Porn Stars To Follow On Instagram

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Porn stars are beautiful women who aren't afraid to flash a boob here and there (among other, more explicit things). For these reasons and more, we love them. What's less known about these busty ladies is that that they're savvy entrepreneurs as well, as it's their responsibility to market themselves through whatever means necessary to book more gigs and earn a more generous following. Since social media is free, many porn stars offer ample content on their networks in hopes to garner said following.

Since Instagram is such a visual medium, there's no better method for porn stars to market themselves through such explicit means. As such, I've taken it upon myself to edit down the hundreds of popular porn star Instagram accounts and provide the top 11. So do yourself a favor and spice up your newsfeed by following the 11 ladies below.

Lisa Ann
The reigning queen of porn and MILF extraordinaire, Lisa Ann, is an expert marketer who further proves her prowess through her superb Instagram account, granting viewers exclusive backdoor – apologies, backstage – access into the life of one of the most famous porn stars on the planet, complete with images with celebrities (most of which are with athletes she's presumably banging), naughty images (a must), and the goings on in her A-list lifestyle.


Tori Black

😌

A photo posted by Tori Black (@misstoriblack) on

Tori Black is sexy and she knows it. She is the embodiment of the modern porn star (which – in case you haven't noticed by industry newcomers – means she has real boobs, a great ass, and looks like she could live in the house next door) and isn't afraid to post nude or nearly-nude images of herself in the shower, bathroom, hotel room, on set, you name it – she'll get naked in it. She takes sexy videos as well, in case you needed any more reasons to follow.


Mia Khalifa

#wine#cheers

A photo posted by Mia khalifa (@miakhalifa69) on

Lebanese porn star Mia Khalifa was arguably the most talked-about porn star in 2015, and after viewing her Instagram account you'll see why. With over 80,000 followers, Khalifa's account feels like a glimpse at an average 20-something girl doing her thing – except for Khalifa, her thing is having sex on camera. Give her a follow and you'll see why this newcomer has garnered so much praise. Also: expect lots of nudes.


Romi Rain

So wet and still so dirty. 😈💦 #bubblebathanyone?

A photo posted by Romi Rain (@romirain) on

Romi Rain is sex on a stick. There is absolutely nothing about her that doesn't say "I'm the girl of your dreams of the non-dry variety." What's more is Romi gives into this sexual identity by posting images in the skimpiest of lingerie, seductive videos doing mundane things (eating a cupcake has never been so hot) and letting viewers know which scenes she's filming, and when you can check them out. She's a porn star who loves her job and the account is undeniable evidence of this.


Christy Mack

New year, same Mack.

A photo posted by Christy Mack (@christymack) on

Christy Mack is so hot it's stupid. So hot, that she call pull off just about any look you could possibly imagine – she's the Nicki Minaj of porn. Mack is built with the male fantasy in mind, and has all the right curves in all the right places. If you're a fan of busty, curvaceous women, you're doing a disservice by not following her.


Dana DeArmond

Me, getting ready to turn up

A photo posted by Dana DeArmond (@danadearmond) on

Award-winning porn star and self-professed cat lady, Dana DeArmond, is a truly down to earth chick who often posts about her hobbies – which would appear to be eating, skiing and having sex – as well as her most entertaining content of all: screenshots of what men say to her on Tinder – her responses are priceless.


Veronica Rodriguez
Every man loves a Latin body, and Rodriguez's does not disappoint. Though most of her images appear staged, we're not complaining because they're sexy as hell: whether she's sharing a bowl of milk with another lady while dressed as a kitten, or making out with fellow porn stars at event expos, we like them all.


Alexis Texas

Boat party 😜🎉 photos by candyman 😁@julesjordanx #teamtexass

A photo posted by Alexis Texas (@whitegirlpoliticking) on

Attention all ass men: follow this account for plenty of Alexis Texas and her ass! You're welcome.


Tanya Tate

Last day to meet me @sexpouk come get a selfie & a @fleshlight_official @fleshlight #London #olympia

A photo posted by Tanya Tate (@tanyatate) on

Tate is a total MILF and huge comic book nerd – but a legitimate nerd, not that "I wear 3D glasses with the lenses popped out," BS. In fact, Tate told me in an interview she chose her name based on how Marvel creator Stan Lee used to name his heroes, adopting identities that have the same first name and last name initials, like: Bruce Banner, Peter Parker, Susan Storm, etc. As such, Tanya Tate and her legacy was born.


Gianna Nicole
Gianna Nicole is beautiful by anybody's standards, it just so happens that she does porn, and posts images of herself naked. No image is anything less than spank-worthy and Gianna is not shy about posting content of any kind – even if she's in a bathtub filled will milk pouring Fruit Loops all over her body.


Joanna Angel

I'm here come hang out ! In the @burning_angel chat room or at tinyurl.com/BAlivesex

A photo posted by Joanna Angel (@joannaangel) on

Angel knows a thing or two about the adult film world, and has proved this by becoming one of the most recognized actresses and directors in the industry (in fact, you probably own her Fleshlight). As such, by following Angel, you're given an inside glimpse at the industry with a VIP access, with new videos, films, actors/actresses, you name it. And yes, of course there's nudity. Plenty of it.

 

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14 People Reveal Things Their Parents Did While Growing Up That They Never Realized Was Weird

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You know that weird thing you do that makes all your friends stare at you in shock and horror? You probably picked it up from your parents, didn't you? A Reddit thread asked users to share the strange thing their parents did that they never realized was totally weird. Here are some of the most notable ones from the thread.

1. The Talk
"When we had 'the talk' it wasn't about the birds and the bees . . . instead, my mother sat me down one day just before the start of sixth grade (around age 11) and had a very serious talk with me about search warrants and police jurisdiction. I was given specific instructions on what to do if the police ever knocked on the door, and also taught strategies on how to stall the police. I was never told why this was necessary. I didn't really think much about it until I got a few years older and started coming across pounds of marijuana hidden around the house and well, let's just say A LOT of weird shit from my childhood suddenly started making sense."

Strange Things Parents Did That You Didn't Know Were Strange Until You Grew Up

2. No Touching
"We're not a touching family, i.e. no hugs, no 'I love you,' no lounging all over each other on the couch. I had no idea that was strange until I started staying over friends' houses for sleepovers. To this day, if I try to hold my mom's hand she'll slip away in short order. I guess it's just not how we do things, but man I'd love a backscratch apropos of nothing."

3. Mom Interview
"When my brother or I would say something gross at the dinner table, my mother, instead of chastising us, would use her silverware as a microphone and pretend to be the host of a talk show she called 'Poopy Chat.'"

Strange Things Parents Did That You Didn't Know Were Strange Until You Grew Up

4. The Towel
"My controlling father would only allow one bath towel to be in circulation at a time. This meant that every morning, four people would use the same towel after showering. He got it first (dry, of course), then mom, then older brother, then me. I thought it was normal to use a soggy towel that had been up someone else's butt crack until I was 17."

5. Drought
"Not flushing the toilet immediately after peeing. Saved on water costs."

Strange Things Parents Did That You Didn't Know Were Strange Until You Grew Up

6. Jealous Mom
"My mom gets extremely jealous and upset at the slightest HINT anyone dislikes her.
Like, 'My favorite person is DADDY!'
'OH well if you don't like me that's fine I just raised you and loved you your whole life while he does almost NOTHING, EVER!'"

7. Playing House
"When my parents played house with us, instead of limiting it to the fun stuff like cooking like most parents did: my parents typed up pay stubs, bills, and printed checkbook registers as part of 'playing house.' Also made us practice writing checks.
I didn't know it was weird until I grew up and talked with a few of my friends about adult responsibilities. When I said that I knew how to balance a checkbook since middle school they all looked at me like I had 7 eyes.
Even though it was weird I'm kind of glad they did it. Made me much more prepared for adult responsibilities than most people my age were."

Strange Things Parents Did That You Didn't Know Were Strange Until You Grew Up

8. Brag Dad
"My dad loves to brag about his sexual exploits. I always thought it was the coolest thing. Now I think my dad is a sexual deviant."


9. Too Much Information
"I'm glad I'm not the only one who had a horny dad. I was just a kid when we were in his truck and he flipped down the visor. I see a picture of this blond woman, fully dressed. And he told me he was cheating on my stepmom with her. I don't know why he felt the need to tell a ten-year-old but he did. And people wonder why I have trust issues with men."

Strange Things Parents Did That You Didn't Know Were Strange Until You Grew Up

10. Family 'Friends'
"We would very frequently have parties with the same adult couples that would come over who I just considered our family friends. All of them very young and attractive. But the adults would all disappear towards the end of the night and we never thought much of it. Turns out they were swingers."

Strange Things Parents Did That You Didn't Know Were Strange Until You Grew Up

11. Batteries
"Kept batteries in the fridge. We'd have a whole drawer's worth of new batteries, but they'd keep them in like a side-crisper or something on the door. I didn't realize it was weird until I moved in with my SO and went to put them in the fridge. She asked me WTF I was doing and I couldn't really answer. It was second nature."

12. The Cuckoo Clock
"In our first home, our parents had a large cuckoo clock in the main bathroom -- mounted on the wall opposite the toilet, so you were facing the cuckoo bird as you sat on the toilet.
Dad used to tell us to note the time on the cuckoo clock when we sat down, so we didn't 'tie up the bathroom too long.' If the cuckoo sounded while we were in there, he'd knock on the door and say, 'Did you fall in? How much longer?'
Perhaps this was the downside of having just one bathroom in the house -- but looking back, it seems weird."

Strange Things Parents Did That You Didn't Know Were Strange Until You Grew Up

13. Mr. Tree
"My dad did this thing around Christmas time that was called 'Mr. Tree.' Basically, my mom would bring us to the window and he would stand behind the Christmas tree and pretend like the tree was talking to us. After Christmas, they would tell us that Mr. Tree went back to the Christmas tree farm. Imagine my horror when I learned that Mr. Tree was not a thing that other kids had."

14. Maybe the Strangest of All
"We have a family verse to the birthday song. Took me a number of years to realize how odd that is."

Related: 21 Tweets That Hilariously Sum Up What It's Like To Be A Parent

 

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Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

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Apparently there are still grown ups out there trying to make a career out of being a DJ because a guy named Danny James Elliot was reached out to by a club owner from the UK who thought he was Danny James Elliot the DJ. He wasn't.

Take a look at how Danny perfectly trolled this club owner.

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

Guy Trolls Club Owner Who Thinks He's Hiring An Actual DJ

And if you're wondering where that YouTube link takes you it's here...


Perfect.

Via The Lad Bible

Perhaps he took it a tad too far: Guy Trolls Woman Trying To Sell The Worst Looking Sofa Ever

 

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Candice Swanepoel Poses Naked On The Beach For Victoria's Secret

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It's always nice to see a Victoria's Secret Angel bare it all, and Candice Swanepoel made sure to do just that in a new photo shoot for Victoria's Secret.

Photographer Jerome Duran took this naked photo of the 27-year-old South African model lying out in a beach in Costa Rica. I feel like Jerome Duran is doing pretty well for himself. Take a look at the picture below posted by Candice herself on her Instagram.

#regram @jeromeduran 🐜 🐞🕷🐛"where the wild things are..." #costarica #puravida

A photo posted by Candice Swanepoel (@angelcandices) on


Removing all that sand off of herself is going to be a bitch, though.

Well that's one way to market: Candice Swanepoel Grabs Our Attention To Promote A New Fragrance

 

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10 Theories Why Men Have Become Less Manly

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Men don't have the mojo they used to. You can tell just by opening your eyes. Recent evidence points to it being an empirical reality. Testosterone, the anabolic ball sauce, has seen a 22 percent decrease from 1987 to 2005 — a 1 percent drop per year. No one really knows why. Even scientists can't figure it out. Since all we can do is speculate, I'd like to toss a few theories out into the ring.

Don't confuse me for a men's rights activist. I have no agenda and I certainly don't blame women. You won't read these reasons in a scientific journal or a men's health magazine, so take it for what it is: nothing more than an honest conversation you might have with your boys in a bar.

1. Estrogen — it's what's for dinner.
why men are less manly, men become less manly, estrogen
In the last 70 years or so, a thing called xenoestrogen hit the market. They put it in nearly everything, including plastics, pesticides, dairy products, preservatives, food dye, skin creams, sunscreens, shampoos, toothpastes and soy. It's an "estrogen mimicker." As we all know, estrogen causes man boobs and late night pillow-crying.

Almost diabolically, they never include xenoestrogen on the labels. Chemical, industrial and agricultural companies added it into the mix to turn a profit, and experts say it has an almost identical effect as estrogen itself. It's like injecting good old-fashioned motherly anxiety in your blood. And because it's ubiquitous, it's nearly impossible to avoid it. Of all the reasons males of the 21st century have lost their "swaggy," this is the one to keep your eye on.

2. Less heavy metal, more Ed Sheeran.
why men are less manly, men become less manly, heavy metal
A study published in the Journal of Infant Development showed that moms who listened to Iron Maiden and Metallica for 25 minutes a day gave their fetuses an 18 percent increase in prenatal testosterone. It may come as a shock to no one, but music has been castrated over the past few decades. While one could only imagine the deleterious effects chronic Coldplay exposure could have on a young adolescent mind, science suggests that even in utero certain types of music negatively affect testosterone.

3. Misandry became cool.
why men are less manly, men become less manly, misandry
The Atlantic says it's "The End of Men." Time says "Men Are Obsolete." The Wall Street Journal says "Guys Are the New Ball and Chain." Classic masculinity is now toxic. To be fair, I understand that before 1960, society was rife with what is today considered sexist undertones. But the pendulum has swung so far back that it's knocked our testicles into our bellies.

And then there's the gleeful cheers from an audience for Lorena Bobbitt on the Steve Harvey Show; not to mention the ladies on "The Talk" laughing over yet another dude who faced the wrath of a woman's knife. When the mainstream media constantly pounds the message into your head that you don't even deserve your penis, some men start to believe it. And they begin to hate themselves.

4. Endemic ball drainage.
why men are less manly, men become less manly, endemic bal drainage, chronic masturbation
Porn. We all use it. There's no shame in it. But chronic masturbation tends to bring down your T levels. A study out of China said male testosterone peaks after seven days of not choking the chicken. I wasn't alive for this, but I've been told men used to have to meet in the middle of the woods at midnight to exchange pictures of a woman's nipple. Now they can watch the filthiest, most disgusting material known to humanity whenever they want. So ball drainage (I believe this is the scientific term) becomes a daily — and hormonally taxing — activity.

5. Softer living.
why men are less manly, men become less manly, softer living
The truth is, every generation before it lived a grittier life. Today, we feel entitled to what our predecessors worked so hard to achieve, and now our fight is gone.

Unfortunately, fighting for something is what makes us men. Teenagers don't build up that love to fight because robots and 40-year-olds took their jobs. As a result, the "Basement Generation" became a subculture. Here's how Urban Dictionary defines a basement dweller: "A male over the age of eighteen, usually with no formal education, who lives at home with his parents and has no ambition to move out or contribute to society. His will to live is sucked by his daily marijuana regiment." You probably know a few close friends who fit that bill.

JFK once posed, "Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country." This maxim has turned into, "Ask for takeout while you play 'World of Warcraft' under the assumption that being the leader of your clan is busy work."

6. "We're consumers." -a demoralized Edward Norton in "Fight Club"
why men are less manly, men become less manly, we're consumers
After WWII, our soldiers came home to a flourishing economy. Between 1945 and 1949, "Americans purchased 20 million refrigerators, 21.4 million cars and 5.5 million stoves," according to PBS. As our economy became evermore saturated with products — both useful and superfluous — we became saturated with the idea that everything was ours for the taking. The window to innovate became smaller and smaller. Today, most of us are consumers, as opposed to our true nature of being producers.

What does producing have to do with general manliness? Purpose. If you have a purpose to build something useful for society, you feel useful in yourself.

7. Bieber hijacked "swagger."
why men are less manly, men become less manly, justin bieber
Once upon a time, men looked like men. They were comfortable in their own skin. Take, for instance, John Wayne. The guy was physically average at best. But back then it wasn't about that; it was about the quiet, self-assured way in which some carried himself. Go to any college campus today and witness the slumped-shouldered, greasy-haired manboys in sweats perspire as they consider asking that cute girl out in class. In the days of Wayne, there was no hesitation. Now you're nervous.

Hell, even women used to be more manly.

There's a monopoly on "swagger" now. And it's owned by the wrong folks. If the standard is a diminutive Canadian with a diamond stud and a penchant for bro tats, there isn't much hope for the common man to relate. A study out of Britain suggests that men have lost their "sexual swagger," and the Biebs and his ilk are to blame.

8. Our sperm cells are dying.
why men are less manly, men become less manly, sperm dying
Danish researchers found a 50 percent fall in global sperm counts from 1940 to 1990. To put it bluntly, lower quality sperm means lower quality spawn. Published in the British Medical Journal, this study was deemed a "serious public health warning." Another study from France noticed just about the same from 1989 to 2005. This could have something to do with No. 1.

9. Man products.
why men are less manly, men become less manly, man products
Does this guy look like he uses a light exfoliant before bedtime? Male cosmetics is an oxymoron.

10. No fathers in the house.
why men are less manly, men become less manly, no fathers
The absence of men in the house has led to a serious void of man-training. There are less fathers (and because parents are now having less children, less brothers) present to teach the behaviors necessary for success. And I don't mean just success in the workforce — I'm referring to success in winning a mate, harnessing myriad skills and accumulating all the ingredients for a healthy male life. Without someone to (metaphorically) kick our asses when we're young, we go into the world with blinders on.

 

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This Iggy Azalea Tweet Got Roasted In The Most Hilarious Ways

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It's pretty obvious that Iggy Azalea has kind of become a gimmick, but she is still moving forward as if she's an actual legit musician by tweeting about upcoming new music. Sadly for her, one tweet from Iggy brought droves of hilarious reactions in a way she probably didn't anticipate.

Check out the original tweet below:

This Iggy Azalea Tweet Got The Most Hilarious Reactions

And these are the hilarious burns that followed:

This Iggy Azalea Tweet Got The Most Hilarious Reactions

This Iggy Azalea Tweet Got The Most Hilarious Reactions

This Iggy Azalea Tweet Got The Most Hilarious Reactions

This Iggy Azalea Tweet Got The Most Hilarious Reactions

This Iggy Azalea Tweet Got The Most Hilarious Reactions









Something tells me these folks aren't looking forward to new Iggy material.

h/t Tumblr

Well, at least there isn't a problem with this: 9 Sexy Iggy Azalea Butt Photos

 

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