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Mandatory

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    I don't have any old relatives who look like famous people, as most of them just look like people who are eagerly waiting for death. But some lucky folks do have relatives who look like some of today's most famous faces. And one of the most recognizable people out there is Johnny Depp.

    Take a look at Johnny Depp in "Public Enemies," a non-Tim Burton film.

    Someone's Great Grandfather Looks Exactly Like Johnny Depp
    Now, take a look at a picture that redditor Mwjstone posted of his or her great-grandfather, and tell me that isn't Johnny Depp. I dare you.

    Someone's Great Grandfather Looks Exactly Like Johnny Depp
    Look at him. It's clearly Johnny Depp.

    Someone's Great Grandfather Looks Exactly Like Johnny Depp

    Trippy.
    Someone's Great Grandfather Looks Exactly Like Johnny Depp
    Alright, alright, alright: Some Dude's Great-Great-Grandfather Looks Just Like Matthew McConaughey

     

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    Apparently some people get more excited about cheap bus fares than others.

    According to The Smoking Gun, a 41-year old man was arrested at a bus station in Coralville last Sunday for allegedly jerking off on a Megabus for...wait for it..."up to three hours."

    guy caught masturbating on megabus
    Police said Telly Shadell Corey told them he "initially played with his penis in his sweatpants" but then "ended up exposing his penis and masturbating for up to three hours because he thought the victim was enjoying it."

    Turns out the young lady who police referred to as the victim did not enjoy what Corey was bringing to the table. In fact, it was pretty much the exact opposite of that, as she told police she was "terrified" by what she saw.

    Police arrested Corey for indecent exposure, but while they were reading him his rights, he reiterated that since the woman didn't say anything while he was punching his clown, he thought she was enjoying it.

    Yeah, that's not how it works, buddy.

    Only the Whoppers on the menu are tolerated at Burger King: Florida Man Arrested For Masturbating Inside A Burger King

     

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    Funny. I once saw my uncle do the same thing at my grandma's house, but he didn't need a can of spray.

    According to Online Athens, a 20-year-old University of Georgia student was arrested for disorderly conduct, public intoxication and underage consumption of alcohol last Saturday after the fart spray he unleashed in a woman's face was so pungent that it cleared out a local bar.

    man arrested for using fart spray
    Police said Blake Zengo was pointed out by other patrons at Whiskey Bent as the man behind the stench. When they told Zengo that there was a complaint about him "spraying people with Fart Spray," he denied it albeit while using slurred speech.

    Officers noted that Zengo was only 20 years old after inspecting his ID, and during a subsequent search of the underage drinker, they found a can of "Liquid ASS" in his pocket. Of course, Liquid ASS promises that its product will fill the air with a "genuine, foul butt-crack smell with hints of dead animal and fresh poo," adding that "the funny pranks you can pull with Liquid ASS are unlimited" and "watching the facial grimaces of people and hearing their comments about the part-your-hair, gagging stench will have you laughing until it hurts."

    By the looks of things, that's a fairly accurate description of Liquid ASS. Well, everything except the laughing part. The woman whose face came in direct content with the fart spray declined to press charges, and we're assuming dinner and movie this weekend are also out of the question.

    This one sounded like it could have cleared out an entire city: Girl Shocks Her Brother With Loud, Powerfully Gross Fart

     

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    Baseball can be a pretty boring game. One couple taking in the Mets-Indians game at Progressive Field on Saturday decided to try to spice up the action on the field by getting some action in the nosebleeds. See for yourself in the pic below.



    Here's a close up, in case the Tweet gets deleted:

    indians mets sex

    The Indians won 7-5, but I think this couple is clearly the real winner today.

     

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  • 04/18/16--04:05: Today's Funny Photos
  • Is there anything better than funny photos? Short answer: no. Long answer: no, you stupid moron. So get to scrolling and laughing and you'll forget all about the fact that it's Monday morning. (Crap, sorry for reminding you about that.)

    funny pics

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    Follow Mandatory on Twitter.

    funny pics

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    Follow Mandatory on Instagram.

    funny pics

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    More funny photos are only one click away.

     

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    Everyone loves a good prostitute. Despite their criminality and propensity to transmit STIs, prostitutes live very colorful lives and are always down to have sex right when you need it. Those reasons and others have made them frequent subjects of our favorite songs. Sex-working ladies, men and sometimes those of indeterminable gender all have graced the lyrics from our favorite musical artists. Here, we rank the 10 best.

    10. "Sweet Georgia Brown" – Ben Bernie (1925)

    Who knew that the hijinks originally associated with this song had nothing to do with the Harlem Globetrotters? Adopted in instrumental form -- complete with whistles and bone cracking -- as their theme in 1952, "Sweet Georgia Brown" was written with lyrics about 30 years earlier and centered around the eponymous black streetwalker with a stellar reputation. And though the tune has been popularized by the exhibition basketball team, the lyrical version has been covered by the likes of Ethel Waters, The Beatles and the Grateful Dead.


    9. "Just a Gigolo" – Bing Crosby (1931)

    Though we've grown accustomed to David Lee Roth's uptempo version, this classic goes all the way back to 1931 when it was made famous by Bing Crosby, America's first pop star. Taken from an even earlier German tango, his slow, sad ballad told the tale of a young French war hero who has fallen on hard times and can only find a living as an escort. Many artists besides Diamond Dave have covered this song over its long history and it has been heard in various onscreen incarnations as well, from a 1930s Betty Boop short to the closing credits of a "Mad Men" episode.


    8. "Hot Child in the City" – Nick Gilder (1978)

    We're not sure what is most surprising about "Hot Child in the City" -- that the subject matter of the ultra poppy tune is about underage prostitutes or that its high-pitched singer is really a man. Whatever the answer, this song boasts a combination of all the groove of the '70s with the bright melody of the '80s that were on the horizon. Settling into Los Angeles from a life in Canada, Gilder was shocked by all the 15- and 16-year-old girls he witnessed working the corners of Hollywood Boulevard. Narrating from the point of view of a pederast admirer, he transformed this shock into a catchy radio-friendly anthem.


    7. "Lady Marmalade" – LaBelle (1974)

    Its chorus "Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir" means "Do you want to sleep with me tonight?" It pretty much gets straight to the point and was the reason "Lady Marmalade" drove censors crazy. The story surrounds a New Orleans hooker who does the same thing to her satisfied clients. Patti LaBelle admits the subject matter was completely taboo when she recorded the song, but when questioned on the matter of "[W]hy sing about a hooker?" she immediately answered, "Why not?"


    6. "Call Me" – Blondie (1980)

    Stevie Nicks declined to co-write the theme song to Richard Gere's "American Gigolo" due to a contractual conflict, so Deborah Harry was brought on board instead. There's not much narrative to the song, with the title essentially repeated over and over and over again throughout, but Blondie gave it a groundbreaking New Wave edge at the dawn of the '80s. It became a long-lasting chart topper and her band's biggest hit.


    5. "Bad Girls" – Donna Summer (1979)

    The gritty streets of Los Angeles also inspired another song on our list. This time, Sunset Boulevard --not just an avenue of celebrities and palm trees for those who've never paid the city a visit. Working for a record company, Summer sent her African-American assistant on an errand, and when she returned she complained that a police officer mistook her for a prostitute and harassed her. Though the incident provoked anger in the future Queen of Disco, it also sparked the idea for "Bad Girls." The result -- a brassy ode to the world's oldest profession, complete with bleating car horns and loose women willing to party for loose change.


    4. "Killer Queen" – Queen (1974)

    While some prostitutes walk the mean streets, others are high class, pampered and proper. We meet such an example in "Killer Queen." A departure from Queen's earlier hard-driving rock, it led Freddie Mercury and company to become reigning radio kings. Harmonies, a striking guitar solo and even a bell combine to illustrate our heroine as a fictional female with truly refined appointments. "I'm trying to say that classy people can be whores as well," Mercury once explained. Aren't we all lucky for that?


    3. "Honky Tonk Women" – The Rolling Stones (1969)

    Often introduced at live shows by Mick Jagger as "a song for all the whores in the audience," "Honky Tonk Women" is another example of a spare musical narrative, yet is among the band's indisputable favorites. From the start, we meet a working girl dancing in a bar, and what follows is enough innuendo to get the song banned from the set list when The Stones performed in China. As it turns out, wherever it's played, the song creates a fever whose only prescription is its iconic cowbell.


    2. "Walk On The Wild Side" – Lou Reed (1972)

    Five characters inhabit this enchanting song released in the early '70s, a time when tales of cross-dressers, drug dealers, prostitutes and hustlers were not commonly heard on the radio. All hailing from New York City this time, their ranks didn't just inhabit boulevards like in Los Angeles, but the entire span of the city. And while the call girl and boy creations found in the other songs on this list are mostly fictional, here they are real, and infamous. All "superstars" from Andy Warhol's storied Factory crowd, you can find them immortalized in the trailblazing artist's controversial films, as well.


    1. "Roxanne" – The Police (1978)

    Our list has taken us all over the world -- Los Angeles, New York, parts in between and beyond -- and we have resettled in Paris for our last entry. As the story goes, The Police were staying in a seedy hotel near the city's red-light district and Sting imagined what it would be like to fall in love with one of the many streetwalkers he observed there. An old poster for the play "Cyrano de Bergerac" gave her a name and the song its title. Rhythmically a tango -- much different than the band's usual sound -- the song stood out and has gone on to become perhaps their most iconic. And here, it easily tops the very best songs about prostitutes.

     

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    Usually when the check comes, that's the worst part of the evening. But in the case of these hilarious receipts, some people tend to make the bill the best part of their day. That, or they take the time to share incredibly honest "tips" about the poor service. Enjoy these hilarious receipts, because they're the funniest ones you're ever going to see. EVER!

    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    Sounds like someone got the fun-sized bar.


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    Paid with lovin in Mesa, Arizona? Can only imagine what that looked like.


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    That is NOT what she said, Mark!


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    Can never pass up a chance to give people a little Mitch Hedberg quote.


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    When it comes to Steak 'n Shake customers, you're going to have to be more specific than that.


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    It's never funny to propose a threesome, unless, of course, it's at an Olive Garden.


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    Chocolate Thunder. Now that's the kind of waitress I want serving me! Tendered and paid for!


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    He literally gave his two cents.


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    No whore juice for me, thank you. I've got plenty.


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    Not just a fuck, but a royal fuck. And three of them.


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    Where are people going to buy cream pies and Batman sperm?


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    What's more screwed up, the butter cheese or the ninjas in the parking lot?


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    Talk about a party. Sign me up!


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    This wouldn't be funny, except for the fact they made it into a hashtag.


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    She's got you there, you sonuvabitch.


    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    Yeah, eff that guy!

    And finally, here is a bonus story about an Uber ride that resulted in a receipt you would definitely not find funny...if it was yours.

    Hilarious Receipts photos, funny photos, funny
    Oh, like you never passed out in a stranger's car and woke up in Mississippi!

    Also check out: Even More Hilarious Receipts

     

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    If there's one thing humans love, it's attention. The endlessly networked world of social media has enabled us to get that attention from all over the world with the click of an iPhone camera lens. But when a simple selfie isn't enough, we enter the brutal and bizarre world of "body challenges," where people show off their anatomy in unique and ridiculous ways. Both men and women get sucked into this tomfoolery, and in this piece we'll explore the world of body challenges and see what the heck is going on.

    Underboob Challenge
    The 10 Most Ridiculous Body Challenges
    The world's attitude toward hooters is such a weird thing. We're obsessed with looking at women's breasts but also insanely protective of them. But men can walk around shirtless and nobody bats an eye -- even if they have man-boobs that would make a porn star blush. The 2016 "Underboob Challenge" was just one manifestation of this, when hundreds of women took to Instagram to post pictures of the bottom of their boobs with pens tucked underneath them. The message was clear: Their sweater puppies were firm and perky but also of a nice size, and we read them loud and clear. That said, there have to be better places to keep a pen.

    Belly Button Challenge
    The 10 Most Ridiculous Body Challenges
    Most of these body challenges involve some degree of setup to pull off, but you can do the "Belly Button Challenge" anywhere. Or at least you can try to. Originating in China, the concept is simple: Reach across the back of your body with one of your arms and pull your fingers forward so they touch your belly button. You need a thin waist and lots of flexibility to do it (we certainly couldn't), but having extra-long arms doesn't hurt either. Thousands of people both in China and abroad posted pictures of themselves doing the twist, and even some chubby folks with gorilla arms got in on the fun.

    iPhone Knees Challenge
    The 10 Most Ridiculous Body Challenges
    Leave it to China to make explicit the unhealthy relationship between thinness and beauty. When the new slim iPhone 6 dropped, a number of Chinese women decided to use the device to play up how narrow their legs are with a challenge: If you can completely cover both your knees with the tiny phone, you win. If that seems ridiculous to you, it should, but it was a huge phenomenon in China. The initial post on social network Weibo racked up nearly 100 million views and lots of follow-ups from bone-thin ladies and their new phones.

    Finger Trap Test
    The 10 Most Ridiculous Body Challenges
    So many of these challenges rest on simple superstition -- the belief that if a certain part of your body is a certain way, you're beautiful. One of the most ridiculous examples is the "Finger Trap Test," which started making the rounds in 2014. It's simple to do: Just raise your index finger, placing the tip against your nose and the base against your chin. If your lips touch the finger, voila! You're hot! The test is loosely based on the "3:1 ratio" of facial symmetry, but there's literally no scientific correlation between attractiveness and kissing your finger.

    Bikini Bridge Challenge
    The 10 Most Ridiculous Body Challenges
    Summer is coming, and with it swimsuit season. And if there's one thing women are neurotic about, it's how they look in a swimsuit. The "Bikini Bridge Challenge" of 2014 actually started as a prank perpetrated by notorious messageboard 4chan, where fake profiles of women posted images of their flat bellies and high hipbones holding the front straps of their bikini bottoms elevated over their flesh. The challenge quickly went viral and was picked up by participants who embraced it fully. Sadly, the phrase "bikini bridge" is common on many pro-anorexia sites where women force themselves down to unhealthy weights to conform to unrealistic body standards.

    Reverse Prayer Challenge
    The 10 Most Ridiculous Body Challenges
    Flexibility is a big part of many of these body challenges, but 2015's bizarre "reverse prayer" pose stretched many people to the limit. Like other similar setups, it required aspirants to contort into a bizarre position: both hands behind the back, palms together, with their cell phone in between. The higher you can raise your arms, the more flexible you are -- that is, if you can even get them together at all. The trend swept Weibo before jumping the pond to the United States. One of the funniest things to come out of it was a number of fakers who pulled their hair over their face and wore their clothes backwards to cheat on the challenge.

    Collarbone Quarter Challenge
    The 10 Most Ridiculous Body Challenges
    We've all got bones, but that doesn't mean we need to see them. One of the more perplexing body challenges of the last few years debuted in 2015, as Instagram was suddenly deluged with snaps of women holding spare change in their collarbones. The "Collarbone Quarter Challenge" originated on China's Weibo but quickly spread. The rules are simple: balance quarters on the edge in the gap between your clavicle and your shoulder -- the more, the better. One champion managed to hold a staggering 80 coins on both sides combined. What this proves about your physical fitness is anybody's guess, but it sure looks weird.

    Hairy Armpit Challenge
    The 10 Most Ridiculous Body Challenges
    While most of these beauty challenges involve creating an unnatural image of womanhood, at least one has been used to embrace the natural: the "Hairy Armpit Challenge," which was launched by Chinese feminist Xiao Meili. She encouraged ladies to lift their arms and share their unshaven pits with the world, and offered prizes for the most popular pit selfies. While China doesn't necessarily have the same stigma against armpit hair as the States do, it was still a controversial initiative. Thousands of shots streamed in of ladies in various states of pit grooming, with the most popular winning 100 condoms.

    Paper Waist Challenge
    The 10 Most Ridiculous Body Challenges
    Back to China for another body challenge that makes women make themselves as tiny as possible. The "A4 Challenge" (for those of you not embedded in the printing industry, A4 is the standard paper size for printers, also called "letter size" here in the States) tasked Chinese women with holding a single sheet vertically over their waistlines to show their slimness. Unlike other body challenges, this one was a little easier to spoof -- the farther away you held the paper, the more of your body it could shield -- but if you're upset that you're more than eight inches wide from the front, you should seek counseling. A little quick math extrapolates that a successful challenger has a 25 inch waist diameter, which is really, really tiny.

    Kylie Jenner Challenge
    The 10 Most Ridiculous Body Challenges
    Celebrities wield an inordinate amount of power on social media, and they can certainly use it for evil. Case in point: when Kylie Jenner and her perfect pout started dominating Instagram, tons of wannabes tried to mimic her look, with disastrous results. Rumor had it that Jenner used a plumping device that used suction to increase blood flow to her lips. Without access to that device, "Kylie Jenner Challenge" participants used shot glasses and other cups to DIY it at home. The end result? Hundreds of selfies and videos of poor suckers with grotesquely inflated lips in extreme pain. Beauty is painful, people.

     

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    Now that we've seen the "Sesame Street" gang perform Bone Thugs-n-Harmony's "Tha Crossroads," and homies Bert and Ernie go crazy on Warren G and Nate Dogg's "Regulate," another Dogg has gotten the puppet cover. But this time it's "The Muppets."

    Snoop Dogg's "Who Am I (What's My Name?)" is a classic, and Rowlf the Dog and Fozzie Bear are going to remind you just how good it actually is. Once again, shoutout to Mylo the Cat at Is This How You Go Viral for providing us with this gem:



    Damn, Rowlf don't play around.

    These puppets can deal with this now: Watch Julia Louis-Dreyfus Curse On 'Sesame Street'

     

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    "You know the problem with dildos is that you have to use one or both hands to get the job done...."

    Have no fear, the Dildo Drone is going to solve that problem. Technology is all about making us more and more lazy, so anything that requires the use of our hands or limbs is considered outdated; we're all about hands-free technology nowadays, folks. And that's why this newest creation will make anyone happy.

    The Dildo Drone Reminds Us Technology Is Everything
    From the maker behind the Dildo Selfie Stick, comes the Dildo Drone. And yes, it is exactly what it sounds like. And who cares if this isn't super legit; it's just nice to know there are people out there who want to change the world for the better.

    Check out the Dildo Drone in the video below:


    Sure, why not? Sex Toys Have Way More Uses Than Just Their Intended Purpose

     

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    Sex and politics are two subjects that commingle more than they probably should. I mean, why do they commingle at all? In what way do sex and politics ever deal with each other aside from the assumption that politicians probably have sex with their wives or husbands.

    Who You're Voting For Says A Lot About You Sexually
    Yet for some reason, during this election, I've received several emails about how/why politics affects people regarding their sexual relationships. Two of the more interesting surveys come from dating sites Match and Zoosk, which polled over 5,000 people each in their individual surveys, which makes the information below generously representative of our society during the political run in 2016.

    Though you've never asked for this information in any way, here is how the politician you support affects you sexually.

    1. People Who Are Passionate About Politics Are Quite Sexually Expressive

    Before I get into separating political supporters using the survey information, I will address them as a whole. In fact, the generalization is favorable toward those interested in politics.

    Respondents who admitted they were into politics were 57 percent more likely to explore open relationships and 110 percent more likely to engage in a threesome. I guess there's one disadvantage, actually, and it's a bit of a doozie: 80 percent more likely to drunk dial an ex. Something no man or woman should ever do.

    Who You're Voting For Says A Lot About You Sexually
    2. What Are Hillary Supporters Like Sexually?

    According to the Match's annual Singles in America survey, those in support of Hillary are 129 percent more likely to drink wine (because of course they are), 606 percent more likely to be gay (which could suggest they're more open-minded to the idea of a woman being president), and 43 percent more likely to pursue a committed relationship than a one-night stand. Which seems about right. Doesn't it?

    3. What Are Trump Supporters Like Sexually?

    Trump supporters, on the other hand, were 79 percent more likely to drink beer (yeah, probably), 82 percent more likely to be unemployed (seems likely), and 116 percent more likely to talk smack about an ex (most definitely).

    Who You're Voting For Says A Lot About You Sexually
    4. Which Candidate Would You Want To Get Drunk With?

    According to dating site Zoosk, who recently polled nearly 6,000 singles on how politics impacts relationships, most singles (36 percent) would want to get drunk with Trump of all those up for election, which is understandable, because the guy's a total character.

    Trump's reign was followed by Bernie at 27 percent, and Hillary at a mere 15 percent.

    5. Which Candidate Would Make The Best Wingman?

    Believe it or not, singles believe Trump to be the "most charming and funniest candidate" in the running. Does this surprise you? Because he pretty much swept both categories. Thirty-six percent agree he's the most charming, followed by Bernie (25 percent) and then Hillary (16 percent).

    As for his humor, these results were even more significant, with 41 percent believing him to be the funniest, followed again by Bernie with 28 percent and Hillary with 14 percent.

    Who You're Voting For Says A Lot About You Sexually
    6. Which Supporters Are The Better Lovemakers?

    According to singles in the Zoosk survey, the majority of singles (55 percent) believe Democrats are better lovemakers than Republicans. Hell, Republicans agree, with 23 percent of respondents saying Democrats are likely the better lovers.

    7. Which Supporters Expect Sex On A First Date?

    Trump's, of course. Match's survey found that Trump supporters were a whopping 1,104 percent more likely to expect sex on the first date. Clinton's base, on the other hand, is an even more whopping 2,133 percent more likely to have no physical expectations by the end of the first date.

    Who You're Voting For Says A Lot About You Sexually
    8. Which Supporters Are More Sexually Adventurous?

    You guessed it. Trump again. Ninety-nine percent were more likely to film themselves having sex. Though unrelated, Trump supporters were also twice as likely to lie about the number of people they've slept with.

    9. Which Political Supporter Is Most Likely To Get Ghosted?

    In both August 2015 and March 2016, female singles were twice as likely as males to report "wanting to run in the opposite direction" if Trump was brought up on a date.

    Also worth adding: 36 percent of single females would "ghost" a Trump supporter. If you're not up to date on millennial lexicon, this means she'd ditch without a reason or explanation why.

    Who You're Voting For Says A Lot About You Sexually
    10. All In All Though, We're All Pretty Open To Dating "Across Party Lines"

    That's right. At the very least, we weren't childish enough to dump somebody based on who they're voting for, because that's just juvenile. Zoosk's research found that 84% of singles are willing to date someone from the opposite party. This is a 9% increase from just August 2015.

    Who You're Voting For Says A Lot About You Sexually

     

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    If the roads are completely flooded, just remember you aren't driving a submarine, and don't attempt to drive through it because chances are you won't get too far.

    That was the case when KTRK Houston's news reporter Steve Campion was live in that area, but his news report was thwarted when he witnessed a guy attempting to drive through the flood in his Honda Insight. The guy in the car seems completely clueless as to why he is in the situation he's in.

    Campion of course has to do his best impression of Anderson Cooper and go save the guy. Check out the hilarious video below:


    This is the face of the man who's just realized he's in deep shit.

    Irritated Reporter Rescues Dude From Sinking Car On Live TV
    In related news, does anyone know what happened to the driver of the first car that completely sinks? No? Me either.

    h/t Jalopnik

    Another genius: Live News Report Features San Diego Man Lose His Mind Over His Flooded Car

     

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    ​The sixth season of the hugely popular HBO show "Game of Thrones" premieres on April 24, and that means tons of brutal, gory deaths are sure to follow. ​But before we get to more, let's take a stroll down bloody memory lane and rank the most brutal deaths that have occurred on the show so far.

    We decided to rank these deaths not only by how tough they were to watch, but also by the shock, chaos and drama of it all. See if you agree with our list. And if you don't, please don't wish upon us that we get turned into dust by dragons.

    Two quick notes: there are tons of spoilers here, so if you're not all caught up it's probably best you steer clear of this. Also, you can click on the hyperlinks to see clips of all these death scenes.

    10. Tywin Lannister Dies On The Toilet​ (Season 4)
    Ranking The Most Brutal Deaths On Game Of Thrones
    Tywin Lannister deserved to die; the dude was an asshole. And while he got a quick death by crossbow at the hands of Tyrion Lannister, what makes this so brutal is that the man was sitting on the toilet. That's just humiliating. No man deserves that. What a shitty way to go.

    9. Styr Gets A Hammer To The Head​ (Season 4)
    Ranking The Most Brutal Deaths On Game Of Thrones
    Having a quick death on a toilet is one thing, but being bludgeoned by a hammer, well, that's just rough. Jon Snow proved to be very handy as he took out Styr with one swift swing to the head during the Battle of Castle Rock. The celebration was short-lived for Jon Snow, though, as his lover Ygritte quickly died soon after by taking an arrow through the chest thanks to that jerk Olly.

    8. Kraznys Burned Alive By Dragons (Season 3)
    Ranking The Most Brutal Deaths On Game Of Thrones
    Being burned alive by a mythical creature isn't high on the list of "ways I could go," but unfortunately for Kraznys, it was. Kraznys quickly learned what happens when you insult a woman: You get disintegrated, which is what occurred when Kraznys thought it would be a good idea to insult Daenerys (Emilia Clarke). And boy did he pay the price, as he was introduced to Drogon the damn dragon.

    7. Shireen Baratheon Burned Alive By Dad (Season 5)
    Ranking The Most Brutal Deaths On Game Of Thrones
    Being burned alive by a dragon sucks, but being burned alive at the order of your own father is just completely tough to comprehend. Stannis Baratheon decided to take his name out of "Father of the Year" running by ordering that his own daughter be burned alive as a sacrifice to Lord of Light by Melisandre. Shireen pleads and yells for help as she slowly dies. Now that's brutal.

    6. King Joffrey​ Swallows Poison (Season 4)
    Ranking The Most Brutal Deaths On Game Of Thrones
    That little prick Joffrey probably deserved worse than what he got. But seeing him slowly suffocate as poison destroyed his throat and insides was probably good enough for us. So shout-out to Olenna Tyrell and Littlefinger for taking down the Lord of the Seven Kingdoms. Although, this is pretty much the same reaction I once had when I accidentally took a sip of peach iced tea.

    5. Meryn Trant Loses His Eyes, Then His Life (Season 5)

    And yet, not the most brutal way to lose your eyes (more on this later). Meryn Trant enjoyed using and beating young girls, but he met a bloody conclusion at the hands of Arya Stark who not only blinds him, but stabs him numerous times, gags him and then finally cuts his throat. All in a day's work for Arya it seems.

    4. Viserys Targaryen Gets Molten Gold Poured On His Head (Season 1)
    Ranking The Most Brutal Deaths On Game Of Thrones
    Sometimes your brother annoys you so much you have to order molten gold be poured on his head. You know, typical family stuff. Daenerys tells her man Khal Drago to do the dirty work, as Viserys gets a bucket full of hot molten gold, and dies pretty instantly.

    3. All Those Damn Red Wedding Deaths (Season 3)
    Ranking The Most Brutal Deaths On Game Of Thrones
    In a scene that caused millions of horrified reactions, "The Red Wedding" was exactly that: full of blood. From pregnant Talisa Stark getting stabbed in the stomach, to her husband Robb Stark getting shot through the heart, to his mother Catelyn Stark yelling out in agony before having her own throat slit open, this one was extremely tough to watch, and remains one of the most traumatizing moments in TV history.

    2. Jon Snow Gets Stabbed A Bunch Of Times. Like, A Lot. (Season 5)
    Ranking The Most Brutal Deaths On Game Of Thrones
    Poor Jon Snow was labeled a traitor, and for that he took multiple stab wounds by all his former friends, including that awful, awful Olly who I wish was on this list. The man walked into a trap and was left with a bunch of wounds in his body. Though perhaps Jon Snow shouldn't be on this list, as he has been rumored to still be alive, and we can expect him to show up on the new season of "Game Of Thrones."

    1. Obertyn Martell's Head Explodes (Season 4)
    Ranking The Most Brutal Deaths On Game Of Thrones
    And now we get to this one. I mean, the gif above says it all. Oberyn Martell, the Prince of the House Martell, goes one on one with Gregor Clegane in a trial by combat to determine the fate of Tyrion Lannister. And well, the confident Oberyn quickly learns this isn't his day, as he gets his eyes destroyed by Gregor, with his head quickly exploding soon after. Yes, folks. The guy's head explodes. This is by far the most brutal death on "Game of Thrones" so far. But I'm sure George R.R. Martin has something else up his sleeve.

     

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    In case you weren't at Coachella last weekend, here's what you've missed so far: a bunch of people sang songs, a bunch of people got high and Kendall Jenner freed her nipple. Oh, what a glorious festival.

    And in case you didn't notice Kendall's revealing outfit at Coachella, don't worry, because her sister Kylie Jenner made sure to zoom in on it so you could get a better look. Take a look at her zoom skills via Instagram:


    Sister bonding sure has changed over the years.

    Here are more shots of Kendall's outfit choice for the music festival courtesy of her own Instagram:

    🌟⭐️🌟

    A photo posted by Kendall Jenner (@kendalljenner) on



    Important things are happening at Coachella, folks.

    h/t Maxim

    And here's Kendall enjoying her goods: Here Are Gigi Hadid And Kendall Jenner Playing With Their Boobs Because These Are The Things That Matter

     

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    And by the looks of things, she's pretty hot.

    According to Uproxx, the hotel that inspired Stephen King to write "The Shining" might be inspiring future guests to lock their doors and hide under the covers or perhaps consider a nearby Holiday Inn Express instead.

    That's because a man named Henry Yau recently visited The Stanley Hotel in Estes Park, Colorado, and we're pretty sure he captured the image of a ghost when he snapped a photo of the hotel's iconic staircase:

    A photo posted by Henry Yau (@ares415) on


    Paranormal investigator Kevin Sampron thinks Yau actually captured two ghosts in the photograph, as another apparition can be seen just to the left of the young lady who's dressed up like she's ready to have one hell of a night. He says he doesn't believe the image was Photoshopped, and while he rules out 95 percent of the submissions he receives, he thinks there are "legitimate ghosts" here this time around.

    Sampron also said he believes the second ghost is a child, and if that's the case, then I'm no longer interested in taking this young lady out to dinner.

    ​A ghost with a sense of humor? Who knew? Mysterious Ghost Child Photobombs Family's River Picture

     

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    Somebody might want to make sure nobody gets this girl a puppy for Christmas.

    According to The Washington Post, a 24-year-old mother was arrested last week after she allegedly left her 9-month-old daughter in her PT Cruiser while she auditioned at a Nashville strip club.


    Police said Kelsey McMurtry (left) went inside Deja Vu Showgirls to audition for a dancing gig and left her infant daughter in her shitty car with the "doors locked and the windows rolled up" for 30 minutes. Her 19-year-old "friend" Summer Taylor (right) was tabbed with keeping an eye on the child, and while Taylor told police she "had been checking on the girl," witnesses told them she had been inside the tit bar with McMurtry the entire time.

    While it was a beautiful 72 degrees and sunny outside, police said the temperature inside the car "likely topped 100 degrees," and that's why McMurtry's daughter was found "drenched in sweat in her heavy coat" when authorities arrived.

    McMurtry and Taylor were both charged with child neglect, but McMurtry was also slapped with a "criminal impersonation" charge for "lying to police about her identity to avoid being associated with an outstanding warrant."

    No word if McMurtry's audition was a success or if she'll have to find a job doing something else, but if it's the latter, odds are you can rule out babysitting as a source of income.

    Vaginas R' Us: The Best Strip Club Names You'll See

     

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    I feel like I'm almost obliged to donate at least a dollar to Hillary's campaign now.

    A KNTV live report on a Hillary Clinton fundraiser in San Francisco Friday night got way more interesting when an attractive young lady decided to jump in the background, lift her shirt and show off her "purchases."

    woman flashes San Francisco live news report
    Of course, the NSFW video is much better than a blurred screen shot, so odds are you'll want to take a peak at that puppy once you leave the office.

    You have to love NBC Bay Area's motto of #WeInvestigate, as in this case, we'd love to investigate just how a girl with such a spectacular rack was able to find the perfect spot to stand without being blocked by either the reporter or the graphic. Plus, with the live shot going down in what looks like an uncrowded area, we'd like to believe the crew on-site knew exactly what was going to happen.

    Our guess is that KNTV is just getting a leg (or shirt) up on the competition just before Sweeps Week.

    h/t The LAD Bible

    Here are two big reasons to use Google Maps: Busty Australian Woman Flashes Google Street View Car

     

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    Bad dog! Wait a minute, that's actually kind of funny.

    dog eats crayons, dog poops rainbows, dog crayon shit
    According to redditor ibluemyself0, their dog (not the dog pictured above) ate an entire box of crayons. And, well, the resulting shit it took was magnificent:

    dog crayon poop, dog eats box of crayons
    I bet you didn't think you'd look at a photo of dog poop and smile today, right? What a world we live in.

    Related: 18 of the Best Cat and Dog Shaming Photos

     

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    Since the Zodiac Killer allegations were passed on to Bernie Sanders once everyone realized Ted Cruz was too young (not to mention clearly Kevin Malone from "The Office"), things have mellowed on the doppelgänger front. That is, until now. We tend not to post stuff like this unless the evidence is concrete, so take that information as you will while gazing upon yet another uncanny resemblance.

    ted cruz grandpa munster gif
    Ted Cruz is totally G-Mun incarnate; actor Al Lewis having been dead for 10 years be damned!

    (via Giphy)

    Related: 25 Of The Funniest Tweets About Ted Cruz

     

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    Forget the NFL Draft. The Los Angeles Rams had more urgent matters to take care of for their football team first: selecting their new cheerleaders.

    According to TMZ, 66 participants tried to make the final cut this past weekend at tryouts. This included stripping down to sexy bikinis and going down the catwalk to impress a panel of judges that included former Rams great Marshall Faulk.



    Nice work, ladies. Ultimately, 25 of these beauties were selected to be 2016 L.A. Rams cheerleaders. Congrats to them.

    More: The Hottest NFL Fans Of All 32 Teams

     

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