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Sexy Tan Lines To Get You Motivated For Summer

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When it comes to summer, is there anything that excites the average man more than sexy tan lines? Or, rather, #sexytanlines on Instagram. Sure, you have to root through the riffraff to find the truly satisfying photos, and a lot of times even the really good ones will lead you to less than desirable (aka NSFW) pages, but it's worth it for some much needed "inspiration." So kick off Memorial Day 2016 right with some of the hottest tan lines under the sun.

A photo posted by @perfectbuttperfect on





A photo posted by @forlustandlove on





A photo posted by @sexodus69 on





A photo posted by @monkeysee_monkeedo1 on





A photo posted by @perfectbuttperfect on





God bless America.

Related: 25 Of The Hottest #NoMakeup Selfies On Instagram

 

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18 Hilarious Before And After Pet Bath Pics

Britney Spears Bikini Post On Instagram Will Make You Love The Song 'Time After Time'

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Britney Spears knows how to deliver a compelling Instagram post. It's a pretty easy formula, really. Britney Spears plus a bikini plus anything. In this particular instance, the "anything" is Cyndi Lauper's classic song "Time After Time." Which you will now have stuck in the back of your head for the rest of the night. But I have a feeling you won't really mind. Enjoy.

Just chillaxing 🕶

A video posted by Britney Spears (@britneyspears) on

 

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Today's Funny Photos

18 YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think They Are

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The more time you spend on YouTube, the deeper into the wormhole you will go. And before you know it, it's 4 a.m. and you're wondering why you're watching a video of poodles exercising with humans. It happens more often than not. And the YouTube screenshots below just prove that YouTube is a large and strange world. So check out 18 of them, and know that what you see is what you get.

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
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YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Video

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
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YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
Deleted, but here he is.

YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
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YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
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YouTube Screenshots That Are Exactly What You Think It Is
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Via Smosh

And these folks actually get paid for their crap: Meet The Filthy Rich Stars Of YouTube

 

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10 Celebs Getting Autographs From Other Celebs

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Sure, some people have had uncomfortable experiences while meeting a celebrity, but that doesn't mean that is always the case -- especially if it's one celebrity asking another celebrity for an autograph. While it is all about selfies these days, there was a time when a famous person's signature meant everything. And the celebs below know all about that.

Check out 10 celebrities asking other celebrities for their John Hancock.

Mick Jagger signing his name for Andy Warhol.
10 Celebs Getting Autographs From Other Celebs

Elijah Wood waiting patiently for Turkish singer Selda Bağcan's autograph.
10 Celebs Getting Autographs From Other Celebs

Sting giving Gwen Stefani an autograph.
10 Celebs Getting Autographs From Other Celebs

John F. Kennedy signs an autograph for Barbra Streisand.
10 Celebs Getting Autographs From Other Celebs

Harrison Ford gives an autograph to co-star John Boyega.
10 Celebs Getting Autographs From Other Celebs

Madonna almost dying of excitement while Elvis Presley gives her an autograph.
10 Celebs Getting Autographs From Other Celebs

Frank Sinatra asking Yankee legend Lou Gehrig for an autograph.
10 Celebs Getting Autographs From Other Celebs

Mega star Michael Jordan asking mega star Ken Griffey Jr. for an autograph.
10 Celebs Getting Autographs From Other Celebs

Eva Mendes waits for Alyssa Milano's autograph in 1989.
10 Celebs Getting Autographs From Other Celebs

Muhammad Ali signs an autograph for Pope John Paul II.
10 Celebs Getting Autographs From Other Celebs

Via Izismile

Make sure it's really them: 10 Famous People Who Used Body Doubles In Public

 

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Florida Teen Attacked By Shark Over Holiday Weekend

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While everyone headed out to the beach over the Memorial Day weekend, one teen probably regrets doing so as he became the victim of a shark attack. The 13-year-old boy was swimming at Neptune Beach, in waters that were about three feet deep when he was attacked and bitten on his right calf by a shark. Take a look at the aftermath of the bite thanks to a video tweeted by Nicole Snyder of WJXT:


The teen was rushed to the hospital with non-life threatening severe lacerations. The Neptune Beach Police say that based on the bite marks the shark had to be between five and six feet.

And because the teen is going to be alright, I think it's OK to remind you of this great shark scene:

Florida Teen Attacked By Shark Over Holiday Weekend
h/t Complex

Swimming in the tub sounds nice, too: Massive, 60-Foot Shark Caught On Film And Now I'm Never Swimming Again

 

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Video: Gigantic Alligator Strolls Across A Florida Golf Course

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Hey, yet another reason never to step foot in Florida again.

As if it wasn't bad enough playing golf, golfers were able to film a huge alligator taking a stroll across Buffalo Creek Golf Course in Palmetto. Take a look at the video below thanks to Charles Helms, who calls it the "biggest freakin' alligator" he has ever seen in his life:


"I didn't know if we were being punked or something," Helms tells ABC Online. "It was just laying down, resting, when it got up and started moving towards the big lake."

But hey, don't be freaked out because according to course employee Wendy Schofield, "He doesn't bother anybody" and "he's like a mascot for the course."

Sorry, Wendy. But chances are Mr. Met wouldn't ever eat me.

And this happened, too: Here's A Massive Alligator Eating The Hell Out Of Another Alligator

 

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These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

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We can't say that we have a problem at all with honest girls on Tinder, but then again, we aren't their dads. If the dads to any of the gals below knew what was on their Tinder profile they might need to go out for some air, and make a quick call to the family therapist. Check out some Tinder women that are aiming to give their poor dads a stroke.

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy

These Tinder Women Are Most Likely Going To Send Their Dads To Therapy
And then we have these gems: These Tinder Profiles Prove That Some People Have Zero Boundaries

 

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MMA Fighter Pukes After Opponent Farts In His Face

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Whatever it takes to win, I guess.

Two MMA fighters were going at it at the NAGA Vegas Grappling Championship when one of them decided to pull out his secret weapon. Well, "let out" is probably a better way to put it. While grappling one another, one of the dudes just farts in his opponent's face.

Check out video of it below, and check out how the victim reacts:


You can hear the guy say his opponent "farted in his face." And that, ladies and gentlemen, will be the legacy he leaves behind.

h/t The LAD Bible

And sometimes it's more than a fart: MMA Fighter Craps Pants All Over Ring After Getting Decked

 

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Oblivious People In Asia Wearing Racy English T-Shirts

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I remember how awesome I thought I was when I used to stock up on T-shirts with sassy words on them; I'd like to think I was like the 92nd most coolest person in my middle school. But since those days are long gone, it's nice see other people shamelessly rocking those tees. Even though it's probably because they have no idea what they actually say.

Check out some people in Asia wearing some pretty racy T-shirts.

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China

English T-Shirts In China
Via Bored Panda

And here are some clueless kids: Kids In Other Countries Are Wearing Inappropriate T-Shirts Because They Don't Understand English

 

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Jessica Simpson Made Everyone's Holiday Weekend Better With This Bikini Pic On Instagram

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While you were off taking pictures of yourself stuffing your face with hamburgers, Jessica Simpson was off one-upping you, as she showed off her tight, red and white bikini in honor of Memorial Day.

Take a look at the picture below thanks to the 35-year-old's Instagram:

🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

A photo posted by Jessica Simpson (@jessicasimpson) on


Can't wait to see how she celebrates Fourth of July.

Here's a nice way to know more about Jessica: Jessica Simpson Loves Her Daisy Dukes

 

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15 People Obeying Signs To A Fault

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Cool people will tell you that rules are meant to be broken. Find the right rule, however, and you'll be just as awesome for following it. Then again, there are certain signs out there that are completely useless, especially when taken out of context. These are the ones you shouldn't obey, but unfortunately, some people still do.

people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, upside down walk sign
Dude makes one clever joke and it immediately goes to his head. Blood, that is.


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, touch only with your eyes
Seems like an odd request, but you're the sign.


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, metal only truck
So much for keeping both hands on the wheel.


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, men's hats shirts
I bet if Pharrell did it, it would catch on.


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, closed when flashing
Hope no one was planning on using this road today.


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, kiek in de kok museum
I don't think it was meant as a suggestion.


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, car swerving sign
Again...


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, seat reserved really good mood
To be fair, it's a really good seat he can't sit in.


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, free please take sign
As in "Take it as a sign"?


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, place your butts here sign
I bet she doesn't even have multiple butts.


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, you can make it bridge jump sign
Sign. Dare. What's the diff?


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, no diving sign belly flop
The ol' belly flop loophole. Classic.


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, backwards foot sign
That sign is going to have a lawsuit on its foot in no time.


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, man draws bridge draw bridge sign
You didn't say WHICH bridge.


people obeying signs to a fault, funny acting out signs, watch this space sign
I think we're done here.

On the flip side... Even More People Being Totally Badass Rebels And Disobeying Signs

 

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Cubs Fan Gets World Series Tattoo A Tad Early

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As I am writing this, the Chicago Cubs have the best record in baseball and have completely dominated their opponents. Of course we aren't even at the halfway point of the season yet, but some Cubs fans are already believing that this may finally be the year the Cubs win it all. One of those Cubs fan is Dean Masani.

Cubs Fan Gets World Series Tattoo A Tad Early
Masani is a 47-year-old father of four who is such a diehard Cubs fan that he's decided to go ahead and give himself a little ink; ink that clearly states the Cubs will win the World Series before the decade is over. Check out the tattoo that he got a little while back:


The $250 tattoo took about an hour to make, and Masani is OK with his decision: "Look at the lineup they have. This is the worst team I think they'll have until 2019 and they're dominating," Masani said.

Masani added a comma at the end of the tattoo in case the Cubs keep winning World Series. Well, talk about being confident. Oh, and if they don't win? "It's not an option," Masani said. "I have a mental block that there is no Plan B because it's not going to be needed. Of course, I could have them do something with the tattoo, but I don't have a Plan B. No reason for one."

Boy, it's going to suck when the Cubs break his heart yet again.

Via dna info

Place your bets: The 8 Greatest Tattoos That Were The Result Of Losing A Bet

 

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14 TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

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As much as we like to root for the hero in TV shows, it's the baddies that keep us watching every episode, and that's because they just make things more fun. From sinister villains to comical ones, the bad guys below are etched into pop culture because they could talk shit like no one else. Check out some TV bad guys that have perfected the art of trash talking.

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit

TV Bad Guys Talking Shit
Via Izismile

Sometimes the bad guys get all the love: 10 Movies Villains Who Overshadowed The Hero

 

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A Pregnant Courtney Stodden Danced In A Bikini On Memorial Day

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Everyone was eager to throw on their bathing suits over the holiday weekend, and while Jessica Simpson was showing off her boobs on Memorial Day, a pregnant Courtney Stodden was having her own fun.

Check out what Stodden posted on her Instagram, and look out for what she drew on her baby bump.

Embracing these insane body changes with a smile lol #pregnant #babybump 🍼

A video posted by Courtney A Stodden (@courtneyastodden) on


I'm not quite sure what I just watched, but it's Courtney Stodden so I shouldn't overthink it.

She also finds time to do this on Instagram: Courtney Stodden Just Endorsed Bernie Sanders On Instagram In The Strangest Way Possible

 

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It Was All About Asses On Kylie Jenner's Instagram Page This Memorial Day Weekend

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As if it needed a special occasion, right? Kylie Jenner isn't exactly a stranger to putting her sexiest features on display via social media. In fact, a lot (if not all) of the same girls from this weekend's Memorial Day ass-for-all were featured in Kylie's "Suns Out, Buns Out" celebration on Instagram just a few months back. But hey, we're not complaining. Ladies, but probably mostly gentlemen, we give you the latest mother lode of Kylie and friends' heinies:

A photo posted by King Kylie (@kyliejenner) on





A photo posted by King Kylie (@kyliejenner) on


Even Khloé Kardashian stopped by for a quick ass Snapchat. Why not?


(h/t Someecards)

Seriously, is there any occasion that doesn't require a photo for these girls?: Kylie Jenner Broke Her Nail, So It's Sexy Selfie Time

 

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Catcher Lands On Disabled List After Taking Foul Ball To The Nuts

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The Baltimore Orioles lost to the Boston Red Sox 7-2 on Memorial Day, but something tells us that's the least of Caleb Joseph's concerns right now.

That's because the Orioles catcher took a foul ball off the bat of Travis Shaw straight to his nards in the top of the eighth inning:


To his credit, Joseph found a way to finish the game behind the plate after being tended to by the trainer for several minutes. He was taken to a hospital after the game, and it was announced today that he'll be spending at least the next 15 days on the disabled list.

The Orioles didn't go into detail in regards to Joseph's DL stint, but let's be honest: They shouldn't have to. Baltimore has called up Francisco Peña to replace Joseph while he ices down his balls for the next few weeks, but if you're an Orioles fan, you're hoping Peña never sets foot on the diamond because he sucks.

h/t Barstool Sports

Some dude nailed his nuts to the street on purpose:10 Guys Who Did Weird Stuff With Their Balls

 

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Ohio Man Arrested For Pooping On Self-Checkout Scanner At Grocery Store

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On second thought, I will wait in line for an actual cashier.

According to The Smoking Gun, a 23-year-old Cincinnati man was arrested for public indecency and disorderly conduct early Sunday morning after he allegedly stripped naked at his local Hyde Park Kroger grocery store and dropped a deuce on one of their self-checkout scanners.

Ohio Man Arrested For Pooping On Self-Checkout Scanner At Grocery Store
Police said Colin Murphy smelled of booze, had slurred speech and was staggering when they arrived on the scene. But that was nothing compared to what went down earlier, as witnesses said Murphy stripped naked in front of a male employee and then shit on a "U-Scan it."

Not even Murphy's sweet mustache could save him from spending a night in jail before somebody posted his $2,000 bail. A pre-trial hearing was set for Wednesday, but in the meantime, he'll have to shop elsewhere if he's in the mood for Pabst and Doritos, as a judge has barred him from setting foot in the Kroger store.

No word if the self-checkout scanner politely asked Murphy to remove his last item from the scanner after he crapped on it, or if it just considered it close enough to a bag of Chili Cheese Fritos and asked him to continue shopping.

If you aren't pooping within 30 minutes of waking up, you're in trouble: Doctors Have Determined The Best Time Of Day To Poop

 

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Years Of Sexual Innuendo And Fart Jokes Have Made Steve Harvey's Life As 'Family Feud' Host A Living Hell

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Steve Harvey's slow descent into madness from hosting "Family Feud" for so many years has never been more prominently displayed than in the following video. The latest from Super Deluxe, this montage uses extreme zooms, voice distortion and even a bit of slow-motion for added comedic/dramatic effect, impeccably capturing what it must be like having to listen to people's workarounds on topics such as slicing their husband's "tallywhacker" in half, audible flatulence and literally everything else you shouldn't say on family-oriented television day in and day out since 2010. Needless to say, it seems like a nightmare that will never truly end.


(h/t The A.V. Club)

Related: Steve Harvey's Mental Breakdown Continues With This 'Family Feud' Answer

 

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