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- 09/06/16--07:37: _19-Year-Old Fitness...
- 09/06/16--11:59: _Miserable Guy On Fe...
- 09/06/16--12:04: _Florida Man Arreste...
- 09/06/16--12:23: _Everyone In This Gu...
- 09/06/16--12:37: _Watch This Florida ...
- 09/07/16--04:18: _Today's Funny Photos
- 09/07/16--05:13: _The 10 Best Horny O...
- 09/07/16--05:46: _Feast Your Eyes On ...
- 09/07/16--05:50: _The Cast of 'Growin...
- 09/07/16--06:36: _WWE Divas Eva Marie...
- 09/07/16--06:40: _Thanks To This Twit...
- 09/07/16--07:20: _Here's Why Dog Peop...
- 09/07/16--07:30: _18 Confessions Of G...
- 09/07/16--08:04: _Woman Caught Giving...
- 09/07/16--08:37: _Hacked Sign Warns C...
- 09/07/16--08:50: _Soccer Player Tryin...
- 09/07/16--08:58: _Southwest Flight At...
- 09/07/16--10:37: _Fitness Model Mandy...
- 09/07/16--11:27: _70-Year-Old Man Rob...
- 09/07/16--12:04: _Super Uncomfortable...
- 09/07/16--04:18: Today's Funny Photos
- 09/07/16--05:13: The 10 Best Horny Old People News Stories Of All Time
- 09/07/16--05:46: Feast Your Eyes On Every Chain Restaurant Menu Rolled Into One
- 09/07/16--05:50: The Cast of 'Growing Pains' Then and Now
- 09/07/16--07:20: Here's Why Dog People Are Officially Better Than Cat People
- 09/07/16--08:37: Hacked Sign Warns Canadian Drivers To Watch Out For 'Zombie Dicks'
I just started running because I realized that I'm getting older and sooner or later I will have a paunch that will push gals to a distance (more so). But now complaining about how currently sore I am is useless because this 19-year-old fitness phenom kicks ass in the gym.
Happy Monday y'all! I am SO EXCITED to announce that I am now representing MAN Sports! Extremely blessed and excited to be a part of this outstanding company and their amazing products!😍❤️🙏🏻 #mansports #nutritox #fitness #blessed #thankful #smile #postivevibes #behappy #happymonday #girlswholift #girlswithmuscles #motivated #fitness #abs
Kendra Saba has been turning heads in the fitness world, as her Instagram already boasts over 16K followers, and the way she handles herself in the gym looks better than a lot of the dudes who you usually see yelling while lifting weights, quickly followed by high fives to no one.
Get to know Kendra a tad more by checking out some of her pictures thanks to her Instagram:
Happy Friyay!😛❤️ "Country Cuties" was the theme the other day at work😋 I love my job! If you haven't been to Tight Ends Sports Bar you're missing out! Also next Wednesday is our 1st annual bikini contest!!! Hope to see you all there😜💁🏼👙You don't want to miss it! #tightendsplano #lovemyjob #bikinicontest #waitress #comeseeme #happyfriday #lovelife #work #bikinicompetitor #abs #fitness #motivated #itsalifestyle
A little BTS from the @mansports photoshoot today! YES I am laying in a GIGANTIC pile of REESES PIECES😭😩😍❤️🙏🏻 what more could a girl ask for?😍😭 I was in heaven🙏🏻❤️ Plus I got to lay in a whole bunch of other candies too & lick vanilla ice cream & drink some chocolate milk😜😋💕👌🏼lol (if u haven't already go follow @MANSports snapchat to see all of the fun behind the scenes footage!😜) This was one of the most fun shoots I've done😍❤️ I can NOT wait to see the finished products! S/O and huge thank you to everyone that helped out today! So blessed to be part of such an amazing company and team with such amazing people!🙏🏻❤️ happy Monday everyone!😘💕💁🏼 #happymonday #mansports #blessed #happy #thankful #reesespieces #girlsqhoworkout #itsalifestyle #livelife #photshoots #smile #postivevibes #fitness #workout #dowhatyoulove #mansportsathlete
Motivation Monday guys!😄👍🏻 And a little update for y'all & LONG post coming so sorry in advance lol! Within the past few months I have just recently started practicing flexible dieting or IIFYM! I have to say I am absolutely obsessed & in love with it! It has helped me SO much with the binge eating problem I struggled with so hard post-show last year. This year I haven't had that problem at all! I don't EVER feel restricted with my foods & I have so much variety in my diet now that I don't feel the need to binge! It has TRULY been life changing for me & if you struggle with binge eating or you just want more variety in your diet I HIGHLY recommend you look into & research flexible dieting! I am almost 2 months post show & I am ONLY 3.4 lbs above what I weighed on stage..which is CRAZY to me bc I gained weight super fast last year after my shows. I am still experimenting with my macros & still slowly adding in more calories etc! But the main thing I want to point out is that I am ENJOYING life. I'm going out to social events with friends, movies, restaurants etc & I AM eating things at those places. But the difference from last year to now is that when I eat those things & indulge I'm not binging or feeling the need to blike I would have in the past. It really is all about MODERATION ya'll & I am a FIRM believer in that now that I have found flexible dieting. I am truly just SO happy because I feel like I am finally starting to find balance in my life.🙏🏻😍❤️ It has not been an easy journey to get to this point but I want to let you know it IS possible. No matter what gets in your way just keep moving forward & you WILL get where you want to be. & please don't think I am saying you will only find balance if you do flexible dieting! Bc that's NOT what I'm saying. I just want to let you know what is working for me & maybe it can give you some other ideas & help you out a little! But at the end of the day all that really matters is your own happiness so do whatever makes YOU happy.😊🙏🏻☺️ #motivationmonday #smile #behappy #flexibledieting #iifym #inspire #balance #positivevibes #girlswhoworkout #girlswithmuscle #determined #driven #lovelife
In honor of hump day!😜☺hehe😏🍰🍑️ and a mini tb to 4th of July weekend😍🍺❤️💙 thank you @srevengebikini for my swimsuit! I'm so obsessed😍👙#booty #appreciatethebooty #humpday #wgw #workout #thankusquats #npcbikinicompetitor #npc #vipsupplementwarehouse #muscles #girlswholift #eatclean #itsalifestyle #behappy #murica #offseason #bootygainzzz
Now check out Kendra in the gym:
Now follow these gals: Follow The 12 Hottest Fitness Girls On Instagram
All that the guy below wanted to do is hang out with his date and possibly get some action, but what actually occurred was that he ended up on a Ferris wheel at the Minnesota State Fair, all while his date completely ignored him as her phone took top priority. And the internet once again came out of the woodwork once a picture of this dude looking miserable as all hell hit the web (people still say "the web"? Asking for a friend).
Check out the original picture below. Notice the utter hopelessness in his eyes:
And now the internet got to work thanks to Reddit:
Although judging by his face they've been married a few years.
This happy couple was crushed: A Couple Asked For Photoshop Help And The Internet Rose To The Occasion (Again)
Mack Yearwood is a 41-year-old Florida man who measures in at 5'6" and tips the scales at 148 pounds.
He's also a f**king moron.
According to ABC News, after the Stuart Police Department created a "Wanted of the Week" poster for Yearwood based on his felony warrant for two counts of battery, Yearwood thought it would be a good idea to make that poster his profile picture on Facebook.
It was not, as a tipster pointed it out to police and they promptly arrested him.
Oh, but Yearwood's shitdickery didn't stop there. Police said he asked to put on a pair of jeans after they arrived to take him downtown, and wouldn't you know it, it just so happened to be the same pair of jeans where Yearwood was hiding his weed stash.
And then, as if things couldn't have gotten any worse for Yearwood, the police jumped on Facebook and trolled the everliving shit out of him.
If common sense was this difficult for Yearwood, we can only assume that prison life is probably going to be quite the bitch for him as well.
He's definitely not the first dipshit to come out of the Sunshine State: Florida Man Arrested After Bragging About Selling Drugs On Facebook
Dr. Christopher Callam is an organic chemistry professor at THE Ohio State University, and he just might be the coolest teacher of all time.
Callam allows one student every year the chance to win the entire class a score of 100 percent on their first quiz if that student can throw a crumpled up ball of paper across the classroom and land it in the trash receptacle at the front of the room.
Well, guess what Vinny Forte did when he was given the opportunity this year:
S/o to Benny for making this shot and getting the entire lecture an automatic 100 on our first ochem quiz pic.twitter.com/nmYJ34DjdM— rachel brown ✧･ﾟ: * (@yo_rochelle) September 2, 2016
Callam said that nobody came close the first 10 years he tried the stunt, but the last two years, students have made miracle shots and earned the love of every single one of their fellow classmates.
"I just randomly throw the ball up to the balcony and whoever grabs it is the 'proton acceptor' or Lewis base and I make the horrible and classic joke that 'I just made an acid of myself,'" Callam said. "When the student made the shot last year no one had a video of it because no one thought it would go in. This year I told them we had to live up to last year making the shot so get your phones out. The student who made it 'Vinny' had his named chanted for several minutes after he made it. Not your normal day in Ochem."
Our guess is that Vinny will have no shortage of dates for the rest of the semester. Well played, kid.
If you thought that shot was amazing, wait until you see this one: Golfer's Trick Shot Opens A Bottle Of Champagne
If you thought that you had seen it all in Florida, well, think again.
According to the New York Daily News, a 19-year-old Florida woman was arrested over the weekend after a surveillance camera captured her setting fire to her ex-boyfriend's ride in an effort to get some kind of revenge on him.
The problem with that? You guessed it: The shitty Honda Civic that Carmen Chamblee set ablaze didn't belong to her ex. That's right, kids. The owner (or former owner, I guess) of the car is Thomas Jennings, and he was none too pleased with Chamblee's antics.
Call it a hunch, Carmen, but maybe your ex-boyfriend dumped you because you never paid attention to anything he was doing. And if he indeed really was your boyfriend, then odds are you probably should have been able to correctly identify the hunk of shit he used to pick you up in before taking you out for a delicious "2 for $20" meal at Applebee's.
It would have been even more embarrassing if she would have set the wrong dick on fire: Woman Sets Cheating Boyfriend's Penis On Fire Because Hell Hath No Fury Like A Woman Scorned
It's intro time! But luckily for today's batch of hilarious photos, they won't have to say, "I'm glad I don't have to follow that guy" because I'm absolutely terrible at these. So...Wednesday's, huh? Not the kind of hump day I was hoping for, amiright gentlemen?
...I'm not exactly sure what to do if I'm not booed off stage by this point, so let the funnies take it from here and call it a day.
Funny Photos capture all the precious moments in life.
You know what goes great with funny photos? More Funny Photos.
ICYMI: Yesterday's Funny Photos
#10 - 105-Year-Old Woman Requests Hunky Firefighters for Her Birthday
On August 18, a woman in Crawcrook, England, turned 105. What did she want for her birthday? A team of hunky firefighters to crawl through her window in a faux rescue operation. The century-old Ivena Smailes requested the present, and the Tyne and Wear Fire and Rescue Service obliged. Smailes told ABC News,"It was great! Out of this world." Why did the fire and rescue team do it? "All because the lady loves a burly firefighter," they wrote on Facebook. Smailes said next year she would like to meet Prince Harry -- which is possibly another attempt to meet a hunk.
#9 - Two Teenagers Tie 84-Year-Old Sugar Daddy Up for 20 Hours
SeekingArrangement.com bills itself as a site where "arrangements" can be sought, mostly of the sexual kind. But one fateful day in 2014, octogenarian Paul Aronson would play the sugar daddy card too hard, and end up the fool. He contacted 17-year-old Shaina Foster through the website. They went on one date. On the second date, Foster brought along her twin sister. They dined at an expensive restaurant in Midtown, and they went back to Aronson's posh brick townhouse located on East 38th Street. He poured them raspberry-flavored rum. Then they tied him to a coffee table using zip ties and proceed to steal $470 in cash and his credit cards. They spent the night buying clothes and makeup.
When Aronson brought the high schoolers to court, Shaina couldn't understand his epic levels of chutzpah: "He asked to do things I wasn't going to do. He is ugly, old and disgusting. I tied him up. I took his money and left. He was starting to creep me out." What a way to go out.
#8 - Four Men -- Ages 85, 77, 72 and 67 -- Caught Banging in Parking Lot
I'm all for homosexuality. In the 21st century, I say let your multicolored flag fly. But there has to be a line drawn somewhere. In July, police in Danbury, Connecticut, received numerous complaints that something gross was happening in the parking lot of a public park. So they set up surveillance cameras. Over the span of several days, these candid cameras picked up Michael Melnick, 85, Pat Barbato, 77, Stuart Sherr, 72, and Jay Doyle, 67, banging like cymbals in a car. All of them were charged with public indecency.
#7 - 92-Year-Old Woman Fires Guns at Neighbor's Home After He Refuses to Kiss Her
Helen Staudinger -- an old leathery woman who has seen some shit judging by her mugshot -- was peeved to high heaven in 2011 when her neighbor, 53-year-old Dwight Bettner, didn't kiss her. So she did what any sane, logical, 92-year-old person would do: took a semi-automatic pistol and fired four shots at his house.
"If my head would have been over just a little bit further, a bullet probably would have hit me in the back of the head," Bettner said. According to the official story, Staudinger entered his home uninvited and he told her to, "Get your ass out of my house." She said she wouldn't go unless he kissed her. He slammed the door in her face and then Staudinger popped caps. She told the Ocala Star Banner he was a "smooth talker" who would sometimes give her a peck on the lips or cheek, and they would sometimes go to dinner. Bettner denied those claims, but he did say he kissed her on the cheek once out of politeness.
You stuck your tongue in her mouth, didn't you, you freak? Anyway. The crazy old horndog was placed in jail on $15,000 bail.
#6 - Nursing Home Buys 85-Year-Old Woman a Male Stripper, Son Sues
"Vile" is the word he used to describe the event. One January day in 2014, Franklin Youngblood found a picture of a jacked up male stripper grinding his 85-year-old mom. We weren't there to see it, but we speculate Franklin threw the picture down and yelled "AH HELL NAH." His mother, Bernice Youngblood -- whose blood is far from young -- is seen stuffing dollars down the stripper's underwear.
Franklin said his mother lacks the physical and mental capacity to make such a decision, which is quite condescending and ageist to say the least. "I felt terrible. I was shaken and going on." Bro, let your mom get some beef. The facility's attorney rebutted, "There is nothing inappropriate about it," and his case was bolstered by the fact that 16 people on the nursing home panel approved it.
#5 - Senior Citizen Has Penis Amputated After Viagra Overdose
In the headline we said these are the "best" horny old people moments, but this moment was far from the best for Gentil Ramirez Polania. In 2013, the 66-year-old Colombian farmer knowingly ingested too much Viagra to impress his new girlfriend. What happened next to his penis wasn't "gentil" at all.
It got inflamed, gangrenous, and fractured. He had a boner for several days. Luckily, surgeons got to work, and according to Dr. Antonio Correa, "The patient showed bruising on the testicles and penis, was treated and is recovering well." The punchline: This all took place in a town called Gigantic.
#4 - Old Woman on the Cusp of 70 Is Arrested for Drunken Public Sex
If you haven't heard of The Villages, we envy you. This Florida retirement community is home to some of the rankest sexual activity on the face of the earth. STD rates there are among the highest in all of America. It's where old people go to rest...on each other. In the summer of 2014, police found 68-year-old Margaret Ann Klemm naked, drunk and visibly horned. Her flame, the 20-years-younger David Bobilya, had his pants around his ankles. They were having sex in the public square. Coincidentally, this happened four days after Klemm was cited for DUI when cops found her driving wasted on a golf cart.
#3 - Old Cali Couple, 72 and 62, Caught Smacking Hams in Parking Lot
In the quiet town of Sonora, California, something not-so-quiet happened in 2013. Two decrepit lovebirds had just finished eating at Doc's Smoked BBQ and Burgers. Full, they decided they wanted dessert. Customers alerted the police after they walked by their car, where they were jamming. "It gets hot back here and it was obviously getting hot out there," restaurant owner Rachael Shevlin said.
The naked Linda Titus, 72, and Gary Wells, 62, were cited for indecent exposure and soon released. News spread through the town and one local said, "Seventy years old? I hope I'm doing that when I'm 70." Don't we all. Another said, "That's just weird. I don't know, that's all I can say about it." Shevlin said she isn't mad at the couple for their expression of love, and hopes they come back. "It'll be a little awkward. We might all be like 'You go deal with him. No, you go deal with him,' but you know, it will be all right."
#2 - Horny Woman Dials 911 and Begs for Sex
On February 25, 2014, a Punta Gorda, Florida, woman dialed 911. Maria Montenez-Colon -- who is 58 but appears to be in her late 60s -- told dispatch that her son took her late husband's Corvette and that she wanted it back. But when the officer arrived to her home, her intentions became crystal clear.
"You are so sexy," Montenez-Colon told the officer. "Are you married?" Things got weirder. "I haven't been penetrated in years." When the officer said she was being inappropriate, she said, "I know, I'm bad." When he further questioned whether there was anything he could do for her, she grabbed the cop's arm and said, "You can f**k me." He gave her his business card and said to never call the emergency line, only the non-emergency line.
But the desperate aged Latina wasn't done. She called 911 again. She told them the officer "pissed her off" and asked to see another. She elaborated: "He was a perfect gentleman, but when I asked him to f**k me, he turned me down so that made me angry." Dispatch asked if she remembered the officer telling her to call the non-emergency line, to which she replied, "I do, but how else am I going to get you to f**k me."
Montenez-Colon was arrested, handcuffed and booked in Charlotte County Jail.
#1 - 81-Year-Old Man Accused of Sex Act with Shrubbery
In July, a man in Stratford, Connecticut, was arrested for having sex with his bushes. A neighbor videotaped 81-year-old Wallace Berg naked in his yard humping shrubs. Berg stopped, covered himself with a grill cover, apologized and went inside his home. The nosey tattletale called the police and Berg was sent to jail, where he posted a $10,000 bond.
I thought this was America!?
When you go to a chain restaurant, you should know immediately what you're getting yourself into. I mean, they're all the same. They may choose different adjectives to describe their chicken fingers, but at the end of the day, they're all the same. So what would an honest chain restaurant menu look like? This. This is exactly how every menu would look if they were being completely honest.
Yes, life can be pretty monotonous: Every Trip To Target Pretty Much Goes Like This
Alan Thicke (Dr. Jason Seaver)
Alan, not to be confused with his son Robin (the guy who got Emily Ratajkowski topless in his music video), is a longtime actor, around since the late '60s and still going strong. Aside from game show hosting, he's had a number of credits for composing music for shows, too. That explains how his son got where he is, you know, with Emily's ta tas. Alan is still hip as ever, showing up in new hits like "Scream Queens" and the new season of "Fuller House," reportedly as Jason Seaver! Dun-dun-duuun!
Joanna Kerns (Maggie Malone Seaver)
The voice of reason, played perfectly by a Lifetime movie favorite Joanna Kerns, Maggie Malone was mother to us all. Aside from "Growing Pains," and the 2000 "Growing Pains" TV movie and 2004's "Return of the Seavers," Kerns hasn't played any role as extensively, though working steadily, that was, at least until 2010 when she last worked. She played the mother in Judd Apatow's 2007 "Knocked Up," but since has taken up directing TV, including new shows "Pretty Little Liars," "Jane the Virgin" and "The Goldbergs."
Kirk Cameron (Mike Seaver)
Once a '90s heartthrob, Kirk Cameron found God in a big way, such a big way it almost ruined Christmas. Once a Golden Globe-nominated boy actor for a hit TV show, Cameron is now on an evangelistic crusade, preaching to god-fearing Americans with his ministry, The Way of the Master, and frightening moviegoers with his Razzie-award winning holiday film, earning him Worst Actor, Worst Screenplay and Worst Picture all in one quick swoop.
Jeremy Miller (Ben Seaver)
Though he was the quiet kid of the bunch, little Ben was actual stalked by a man during the show's run who threatened to kidnap and kill him. It comes as no surprise that the mid-30s actor sticks to commercials and quiet, small-time movies since his "Growing Pains" days.
Tracey Gold (Carol Seaver)
Gold was a hot '80s girl, but toward the back half of the show's run, she became almost fatally anorexic, which led to a cut in her screen time. A couple years after "Growing Pains" wrapped, she starred in a Lifetime movie "For the Love of Nancy," a story about a girl with body image issues. She's now reportedly a spokesperson for Krispy Kreme. Since her days as Carol, she's done mostly TV movies.
Ashley Johnson (Chrissy Seaver)
Little baby Chrissy didn't show up until the final seasons of the show, but she seems to be the rising star of the bunch. Aside from being an accomplished musician, she had a recurring role on "Blindspot" and "The Killing," as well as guest spots on "The Mentalist" and "Masters of Sex." We think it's worth a mention: She's also a bit of a bombshell....
Andrew Koenig (Richard "Boner" Stabone)
After a few seasons entertaining us with the Seavers, Andrew Koenig ("Boner") went on to write and direct a few short films. Sadly, he went missing in 2010, when his body was found in the woods after he'd taken his life at the age of 41.
Leonardo Dicaprio (Luke Brower)
This guy? Oh, he only went from being the orphan boy of the show, Luke, brought in by Mike Seaver to becoming a show regular and quasi-Seaver. Before long -- what do ya know! -- twenty-something-odd years later, he won an Oscar for his role in "The Revenant." To go on about what's up with Leo would be about as pointless as telling you ketchup is still red.
And how are the Tanners? The Cast Of 'Full House' Then And Now 'Fuller'
Sure, WWE Diva Eva Marie is currently serving a 30-day suspension for violating the WWE wellness policy, and she seems to be taking it quite hard...while vacationing on a tropical island with her WWE pal.
While Eva hasn't exactly made her mark yet inside a WWE ring, aside from having a wardrobe malfunction, she is sure having a positive mark on us with the pictures she is sharing of herself and WWE Diva Maryse on vacation together.
Just take a look at how difficult the suspension has been on her thanks to her Instagram and Maryse's Instagram:
My husband took this photo of me relaxing on the beach, this trip has been unreal! I have been to almost every country in the world and i must say.... This place is MAGNIFICENT!!!!! Exuma is a private secluded island an hour away from nassau Bahamas, only accessible by taking a private jet!!! Its absolutely breath taking!!! Its my favorite place on earth!!!!! I wish everyone could experience this place once in their lifetime!!! Insanity .... #TotalDivas
h/t Bro Bible
Is your favorite on this list? The 20 Hottest Women In The History Of The WWE
If you've ever found yourself ignoring your responsibilities because the thought "I wonder what my dog lookalike is" distracted you, well worry no more, because there is someone out there that is taking the time to answer your important question.
Thanks to the very appropriately named Twitter account YouAreDogNow, people can now submit a photo of themselves and get back a dog that looks just like them. But while you look for the perfect photo to find, take a look at some celebrities and their dog lookalikes, starting with ramen noodle head, Justin Timberlake:
This is why I'm not worried about our future.
More dogs for ya: Photos Of Dogs Sitting On Other Dogs Will Have You Howling With Laughter
Growing up, I've always had a pet in the house. One hundred percent of the time, this pet was a dog. I mean, I had a bunny once when I was really, really young, but he'd viciously attack my parents whenever they tried interacting with him.
We eventually discovered his thirst for blood was too great for our household and as such, I received the "we took him to the farm" narrative parents elect to use when breaking this kind of news to their young child.
My point here is that dogs are the best pets anyone can ask for. My family has never had a problem with the many dogs we've owned growing up and as such, this affinity for pets has been passed down to me. I remain firm in the belief that dogs are the best pets in the world, especially when one tries to tell me cats are better.
Like, are you kidding me? My next door neighbor has cats; two of them, and they are the worst. They have half the personality of most dogs, shit in a sandbox in the living room and are as easy to cuddle as a cactus. They also favor the cold shoulder as a welcoming gesture whenever I enter the house. For these reasons and more, I cannot conceivably understand why people would ever choose cats over dogs. I just can't.
But since my own biased experience isn't enough of a motivator to make my point, I've consulted science to let you know without a shadow of a doubt that dogs are better than cats and therefore, dog people are better than cat people.
1. Cat People Are Wet Blankets
A study from Carroll University in Waukesha, Wisconsin, completely dedicated to discovering the differences between cat and dog people found that dog people tend to be more "lively" (read: energetic and outgoing) than cat people. This makes sense, because dogs tend to be more energetic and outgoing than cats. We're a party.
Cat people, on the other hand, were found to be introverted, sensitive and nonconformist. So basically, the kind of people who conversing with feels like a chore and take 20 minutes to order two beverages from Starbucks while polishing their nonprescription glasses.
2. WAY More People Like Dogs Than Cats
The same study, which surveyed over 600 college students, found that 60 percent identified as dog people, while a mere 11 percent were cat people. The remaining percentages couldn't decide between the two.
So basically, six times the amount of people who like cats prefer dogs. And since we tend to favor majorities when consulting statistics, I'll say this is yet another win for dog lovers.
3. Cat People Are ⅓ More Likely To Live Alone
Apparently, the "cat lady" archetype is based on actual, reported research. Results from Modern Dog magazine found that cat lovers were one-third more likely to live alone than dog owners, as well as twice as likely to live in an apartment. Studies found that cat lovers cite "affection" as their favorite trait in a cat, which I guess would make sense considering the statistics. Being married, living in a house and having children were all characteristics of people who prefer dogs. Not surprising then that single women were the most likely individual to own a cat.
4. Dog People Are More Compassionate
According to research published in Modern Dog magazine, when asked if they'd take a puppy as a gift (considering they had ample space in their home and no complaints from others) 68 percent of cat people said they wouldn't accept a dog. Dog owners, on the other hand, were 70 percent likely to take in a cat (considering the amount of dog owners there are compared to cat owners, this statistic is a lot more compelling than the two percent shown). How could somebody turn down an innocent, living animal? Monsters, cat lovers, that's who.
5. Cats Are Easier To Hate
I didn't just make this up, people. According to an Associated Press/Petside.com poll, 15 percent of adults questioned said they disliked cats "a lot," while the number of people who disliked dogs was only two percent. Boom! Roasted.
6. Dog People Have More Friends
Facebook researchers analyzed 160,000 American users and found that, on average, dog people had 26 more friends than cat people; probably because we're more outgoing. This stat might seem petty, but I'm keeping it here anyway. So there.
7. Dogs Love Their Owners More
This boastful declaration is backed by science, people. So complain to the white coats if you must. Research performed by the BBC documentary "Cats v Dogs" proved that dogs love their owner five times more than than cats do. Because cats are assholes.
8. Dogs Have Jobs
Dogs can find drugs, bombs, criminals, you name it. They're employed by the police and the government and also do charity work, serving as seeing eye dogs to the blind. Do cats do these things? No. No they do not.
9. Cat People Are More Likely To Be Atheists
So take that however you choose.
Seeing eye cats? I don't think so.
Or we can all just agree to disagree.
Everyone likes reading about ghost encounters, but no one likes when those encounters happen to them, and that's exactly what happened to the folks below who got a taste of the other side, whatever that may be. So if ghost stories you shouldn't read alone didn't scare you, thanks to Whisper these ghostly encounter confessions just might.
Now check these out for more scares: 12 Creepy Stories That Will Keep You Up At Night
Perhaps this bold woman saw the video of porn stars revealing the secret to giving the perfect handjob and wanted to try it out on her man, and perhaps she didn't give a damn that she and her man were in a packed restaurant.
A couple didn't seem to mind that there were a bunch of customers at the Orinoco restaurant, in the city of San Pedro Garza Garcia, Mexico, when the woman performed the sex act on the very satisfied (we assume) man. Sure, this was filmed with a potato, but you can clearly see the woman's impressive hand movements. Check out the NSFW video below:
Customers informed the owner who called police, as made evident by the couple being taken away by cops. Local media is reporting that the couple was drunk and on drugs. And I'm reporting that stuff like this doesn't happen at Golden Corral.
h/t Bro Bible
Best game show ever: Japanese Game Show Pits Women Against Each Other...In Hand Job Race
On second thought, we will take the back roads to your mom's house after all.
According to The Huffington Post, police in Ottawa say an investigation into who hacked a street sign last week to warn drivers to protect their vaginas and use condoms because of the "zombie dicks" ahead will only be opened if they receive a complaint about it.
And since no investigation has been opened, then I guess it's safe to say that most drivers were very appreciative of this prankster's tip:
Sadly, we're not sure there's a condom on the market that will protect your vagina from zombie dicks, ladies. So yeah, you'll probably just want to pull over and find another way to get to your destination just to be on the safe side.
This sign is proof the "FHRITP" prank will never die: Florida Construction Sign Gets Hacked, Continues Absurd Vulgar Prank Craze
Soccer can be a dangerous sport at times. I mean, I've seen guys shatter their shins to shit after colliding with another player, guys knock each other unconscious trying to play the ball with their heads and even one referee get shot by an insane player.
And oh yeah, we almost forgot about the guy who recently crushed his cock and balls when he slid into the goal post trying to prevent the opposing team from scoring:
Making matters worse, the poor dude crushed his rocks trying to prevent the ball from finding the back of the net, and it still went in.
The good news? You guessed it: He may have prevented himself from ever having kids in the process, which is nice.
h/t Barstool Sports
Maybe just a fist bump this time around will do, pal: Watch This German Soccer Coach Scratch His Balls And Then Smell His Hands
Passengers aboard a Southwest Airlines flight that landed in Chicago last week received a welcome surprise once their plane touched down. I mean, not only were they in the Windy City for a few minutes without being shot to death, but they also received a hysterical welcome message from one of the flight attendants as they taxied to their gate.
Watch and listen as Zach Haumesser displays his amazing range of voices from your favorite "Looney Tunes" characters and receives a much-deserved round of applause from the passengers for his efforts:
That was pretty damn impressive. In fact, for a second there, it probably made everybody forget how miserable they were because they decided to fly with Southwest.
h/t The Huffington Post
Probably the most impressive range of voices ever from a 14-year-old kid: 8th Grader Impersonates Presidential Candidates In Best Graduation Speech Ever
It is easy to see that we are big fans of gals and their behinds, and it's our job to distract you from the important news out there to bring forth even more important news: Mandy Cherundolo's ass. And who is Mandy Cherundolo? Well, she is just a fitness model who enjoys showing off. And we have zero problem with that.
So allow yourself to be a gross and disgusting human, and embrace Mandy's Instagram which currently sports over 160K followers. Which is only about 160K more than I have. So kick back on your backside and enjoy Mandy's backside -- one that may be one of the best in the biz (The Instagram biz. Whatever that means).
Might as well: The Greatest Asses Of Hollywood, Ranked
I've mentioned a few times that I'm not married, so the huge wave of misery that hits me every day has to do with other aspects of my life, and not a marriage. But unfortunately, there are some poor suckers out there that chose to get married and now they are dealing with the headache. One of those poor guys is 70-year-old Lawrence John Ripple, who chose to go to prison rather than continue living with his wife.
Ripple was charged with robbing a Kansas City bank, and according to court documents, Ripple handed the bank teller a note that read, "I have a gun, give me money." Instead of getting his ass out of there with the money, Ripple sat and waited in the bank's lobby for authorities to arrive.
Ripple notified a bank security guard that he was the guy they were looking for. Police soon arrived, and Ripple later told authorities that he and his wife argued and he "no longer wanted to be in that situation."
"Ripple wrote out his demand note in front of his wife...and told her he'd rather be in jail than at home," an FBI agent wrote in the affidavit.
This broken down man was charged in federal court with robbery.
Via Kansas City Star
A couple that robs together, stays together: Ohio Couple Arrested After Robbing Bank And Posting Pics With Wads Of Cash On Facebook
Everyone is quite aware of the disturbing relationship that Donald Trump and his daughter Ivanka have, as Donald has made it pretty clear he would have banged her a long time ago if she wasn't his daughter. So of course any encounter that Donald has with Ivanka is going to look awkward and gross, and that's pretty much what's going on here.
Check out the original photo of The Donald embracing his daughter thanks to Reddit:
Notice the gross expressions on both.
This is obviously a photo that has to be dealt with accordingly, and the internet did just that. Take a look at some of the most hilarious, and bizarre Photoshop jobs.
The internet loves destroying Donald: The Very Best Of What The Internet Has Done To Donald Trump