Quantcast
Channel: Mandatory
Viewing all 11431 articles
Browse latest View live

Today's Funniest Photos 8-15-13

August 15, 2013, 2:00 am
$
0
0

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧
Search
↧

The Funniest GIFs of the Week - 8-15-13

August 15, 2013, 2:08 am
$
0
0

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

For Ashley Sky, the Sky's the Limit

August 15, 2013, 3:58 am
$
0
0

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

Elvis Presley Asked President Nixon to Make Him an FBI Special Agent

August 15, 2013, 8:38 am
$
0
0
Elvis Wrote a Letter to President Nixon Asking to Be an FBI Agent

We all know how and why Elvis Presley earned the title: The King. He was known and will always be known by that moniker. However, not too many people know that there was another title he was hoping to earn during his lifetime: Special Agent.

That's right, in a letter making the rounds due to the upcoming release of the book, "Letters of Note," Elvis Presley asks then-President Richard Nixon if he could become an undercover agent with his very own official ID badge. The story is pretty bizarre and the eventual meeting between President Nixon and The King became public shortly after, but here are some highlights from Presley's five-page request:
  • "The drug culture, the hippie elements, the SDS [the radical organisation Students for a Democratic Society], Black Panthers, etc., do not [underlined] consider me as their enemy or as they call it "the establishment." I call it American and I love it."
  • "I can and will do more good if I were made a Federal Agent at Large and I will help out by doing it my way through my communications with people of all ages. First and foremost, I am an entertainer, but all I need is the Federal credentials."
  • "I have done an in-depth study of drug abuse and Communist brainwashing techniques and I am right in the middle of the whole thing, where I can and will do the most good."
The letter got him a meeting with Nixon, where Presley then took the opportunity to verbally attack some of his biggest competition in the music scene. According to the Daily Mail, Elvis "indicated that he thought The Beatles had been a real force for anti-American spirit. He said that The Beatles came to this country, made their money, and then returned to England, where they promoted 'an anti-American theme.'"

The final result of the meeting was Elvis obtaining a badge and being made an Honorary Agent at Large. It's good to be The King.

via The Daily Mail (U.K.)

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

Meet Audrey Allen, Playboy's Miss June 2013

August 15, 2013, 9:54 am
$
0
0

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧
↧

The Only Fantasy Football App You Need

August 15, 2013, 11:10 am
$
0
0


I have a small confession. I love fantasy football. Myself and a friend actually go to Las Vegas every year and spend way more money than we should on a fantasy football team, which we spend the next 11 weeks either hating or loving. We call each other at odd hours and just whisper names of third stringers to see if he's worth a waiver flyer. If you're like me, then you are probably already aware of the FootballGuys.com. They are one of the best providers of hardcore stats and fantasy football analysis. Luckily, they also have an app. And even luckilier (is that a word?) we just started APPtitude, our weekly video series that highlights the apps you need in your life.

And if you're like me, you can't get enough fantasy info during the month of August. So grab the FootballGuy's Draft GM 2013 App (you can literally do a mock draft in under seven minutes) (I timed it.)

And if you ever want to discuss who you should target in the 6th round of an FFPC draft, feel free to call me whenever. I'm kind of not kidding.

And while you're at it, subscribe to our Youtube channel. It's almost awesome.

Also, we made this:

Other NFL People With Mark Sanchez's Stupid Hair and Headband

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

Devin Brugman is the Bikini Queen of Instagram

August 15, 2013, 12:37 pm
$
0
0

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

I'm with Phil: 20 Men Band Together To Help Rebuild A City

August 15, 2013, 10:56 pm
$
0
0


Phil Campbell is a person, a town and the center of a heart-warming documentary. Let us explain. In 2011, a New York-based writer named Phil Campbell decided to round up all of the other people he could find named Phil Campbell. The goal: celebrate the 100th anniversary of a small Alabama town by the name of Phil Campbell.

Then tragedy struck. As the 100th anniversary celebration drew near, a tornado hit the city of Phil Campbell. The storm ripped through the town, leaving a 12-mile long, half a mile wide wake of destruction, killing 27 people. Instead of celebrating their town, the residents of Phil Campbell were left looking for a way to rebuild.

Now all of the Phil Campbells originally assembled for a fun project have decided to band together to help rebuild the town of their namesake. "I'm With Phil" is a documentary that follows the many different Phil Campbells from around the globe -- in addition to New York, there are Phil Campbells from Australia, Jamaica and just about every other corner of the world you can think of -- in their quest to help return a sense of normalcy to the town ravaged by a tornado.

The story is not over yet for "I'm With Phil," but it is off to an inspiring start. For more information on the project, click here.

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧
Search

Tianna Gregory Will Make You Believe in Heaven on Earth

August 16, 2013, 1:01 am
$
0
0

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧
↧

Rum Review: Brugal

August 16, 2013, 1:11 am
$
0
0
You may not know it, but today is a very important day. Yes, it is important because it is Friday, but it is also National Rum Day (lucky coincidence, eh?). Many people hear the word "rum" and think of a relatively cheap party booze, used for island cocktails. Others think of the sweet liquor that pirates are known to indulge in. However, as the category continues to grow, you should know that rum doesn't always have to be sweet, and there are current brands on the market that offer a more dry, balanced and sophisticated flavor. One such brand is Brugal, a rum that calls itself "Refreshingly Dry." We were able to get our hands on a couple bottles of their top two marques, and here is what we found:

brugal extra dry rumBrugal Especial Extra Dry

When you first take a sip of the Extra Dry, the first thought you have is that this is not like any rum you are used to, especially white rum. It has a very distinct flavor and dry profile that you'll notice right away. The Extra Dry enters your taste buds very clean and smooth, making it a great rum to drink on the rocks, and ends quite dry with a lingering finish. Our tasters said they detected mild vanilla and coconut flavors, but nothing overpowering like other sweet rums. When it comes to using the Extra Dry in cocktails, the main benefit is that the dry profile provides a very versatile option that works to make drinks crisper, more balanced and refreshing. It's a transparent rum in every sense of the word, and we can't hide that it's a great value, as well.

Suggest Retail Price: $19.99
Alcohol By Volume: 40%
Brugal 1888
Brugal 1888

Once again, the 1888 surprises you with how unlike other aged rums it is. Brugal prides itself in their careful cask aging process, and it definitely pays off here. Like the Extra Dry, it is dry and not sweet, and is very rich and full-bodied. It is a rum that whiskey lovers can enjoy. Give it the sniff test and you may detect some spicy notes and hints of cocoa, coffee and cinnamon. It goes down smooth and leaves a slightly sweet, long lasting aftertaste. The color is a very nice dark amber that is bright and clean. Although you could use the 1888 for cocktails, we recommend sipping on its own or with ice, much like a quality whiskey.

Suggested Retail Price: $49.99
Alcohol By Volume: 40%

For more info, follow Brugal Rum on Facebook.

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

Hotwire For Hookers

August 16, 2013, 1:13 am
$
0
0
  • 1 of 2

    by Matt Shirley

    Are you looking to book the services of a lady of the night, but want to make sure you get the best deal? Introducing Hotwire for Hookers, a discount website built just for you, that offers the lowest prices from our unsold inventory. You may not know exactly where you're going or what kind of lady you're getting, but we can guarantee that it won't cost you a lot of money.

  • 2 of 2
    Next: The Funniest Photos Around

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

The Best Cities for Meeting Beautiful Women

August 16, 2013, 1:13 am
$
0
0
  • atubbs via flickr
    1 of 10

    A man will go to the ends of the Earth if it means finding a bodacious babe, but that isn't exactly necessary. There are plenty of great cities for meeting beautiful women right here in the U.S., and a man doesn't need a compass to get to them other than the one stored between his legs.

    Portland, OR

    With some of the best donuts, bike trails and breweries in the country, along with eclectic book shops like the largest indie book shop, Powell's City of Books, you'd expect to find less than a few well-read gals in Portland with good taste in vinyl and self-made attire like something out of an "Annie Oakley" episode who grind their own coffee beans and hang their DYI dream catchers in the closet sized bathroom.

    Portland, a city known for keeping it weird within its relatively minute cityscape, is about as down-to-Earth as an urban dwelling can get. Places like Voodoo Donuts are what make a woman vie for someone to share her gluten with. And with enough old-fashioned dine-in movie theaters, a few tasty breweries and cafes on any corner, it's becoming more accessible for weird dudes to meet weird chicks with every passing underground indie song in this city.

  • ifmuth via flickr
    2 of 10

    Chicago

    In a city where the bars close down just long enough for you to get breakfast before reopening, you have to figure there's someone for everyone there. With more things to do and see than any city nearby, Chicago stands tall as one of the greatest cities despite those eight months of bitter winter nights and stifling summer days.

    For a city that forces people indoors so many days of the year, there's still an abundance of things to do, places to see and beers to drink. Whether you're into baseball, Lakeshore bicycling or exotic aquariums, Chicago has at least one of everything, and that includes more than enough well mannered Midwestern gals with some good-natured morals and a family full of Bears fans. But don't go strutting into a Southside Sox fan's home wearing a Sosa jersey and talking about how this year's going to be the one, or else you'll be torn to shreds immediately.

  • eric gilliland via flickr
    3 of 10

    Nashville

    Known as Music City for its music diversity and full access to live tunes on every scale, Nashville is the ideal spot for cultured music lovers to find an artsy fox with a thing for flannel and tall boots. With only 600,000 people in its city, Nashville is top dog for a second bump-into, a close-knit city for the wild at heart.

    Between The Parthenon in the park, The District and Vanderbilt University, you'd be hard-strapped to find a place to sit that wasn't already occupied by the lovely ladies of Nashville. If you like your girls knotted at the belly, you'd be foolish to try any other place than the city that prides itself for the peanut shells on its floors.

  • susanastray via flickr
    4 of 10

    Austin

    As a major city, Austin still somehow manages to have the tight-knit composure of a small city with big eccentric vibe. Zilker Park, full of free spirits and hard bodies, is a main attraction to all walks of life, especially to the young, accessible gals of its fair city. With a few of the best festivals, including Austin City Limits, Hot Sauce Festival and SXSW, there's really no good reason not to visit in the spring or fall.

    And in the summer, locals cool off in the cold springs, Barton Springs, where skinny-dipping is probably not so uncommon during the heat surges of Texas. Austin is also home to the Texas Longhorns and University of Texas, where spots like The Drag and Fourth Street are popular places for lady youths and bad decisions. For some unexplainable reason, men of all ages seem to appreciate budding gals of the southern belt. Who knew?

  • markpritchard via flickr
    5 of 10

    San Francisco

    One of the most loving cities in the country, San Fran celebrates all walks of life with its nude cyclists and pride parades. With a youthful glow in its late night hours and some of the best outdoor spots this side of the Rockies, you'd be smitten just walking into the grassy knolls of Dolores Park with that big city view.

    Third Thursdays are great for going to the aquarium at the California Academy of Science for seeing water-friendly mammals while dunking your snout in a tall glass of wine. And with some of the best outdoor Farmer's Markets on Saturdays, you'll notice San Francisco has a lot of friendly faces that are easy to talk to. If you can't find love in the city of pride, you might consider becoming a recluse.

  • koadmunkee via flickr
    6 of 10

    San Diego

    For a little taste of the sweeter things in life, San Diego has the surf-friendly sunshine and bikini bottoms all just how you like them in the land of lady Mecca. The city, which sprawls in all directions, has a little something for everyone, be it the music and bar scene, ocean play or off-roading activities. You can never go more than 20 feet without bumping into some extraordinary beauty.

    With San Diego, it's as easy to say that people who like to rough it can find a good time roughing it in Ocean Beach, guys who like a fancy gal can try an upscale Mission Beach and then folks who appreciate a good cocktail and music with good people can try out Pacific Beach or the Gas Light District. And just outside of these, surf areas like Carlsbad are great for getting in the water and meeting some surfing sweeties. With San Diego, you can't ever really go wrong.

  • antonello via flickr
    7 of 10

    Miami

    Miami ranks as one of the most risque cities, except with more elegance than Las Vegas and hopefully fewer transmitted infections. With a healthy dose of salacious, impressionable women and more nightclubs than you can shake your stick at, this salty Atlantic beach city is home to wild nights, hot days and plenty of foreign babes.

    Any guy tired of the same ol' American girls will appreciate the wondrous variety of Florida's own version of Sin City. Anything you want to do, you can do it, whether soft and quiet like the Schnebley Redland's Winery or loud and hard like the boom-boom rooms of The Vagabond.

  • sam howzit via flickr
    8 of 10

    Denver

    For snow bunnies and legal grass growers, Colorado has a few high-elevated spots in the mountains for you, especially around Denver. If you've never tapped the Rockies or chased the slopes in search of some sweet loving, it's about time for changing that little mistake. With a little of every outdoor activity, Denver is a rare gem hidden in the mountains, like a caveman that's been iced over ages just waiting to thaw and get his rocks off in this hip new era we're trapped in.

    And for the gentlemen who like meeting gentlewomen in large, crowded places with loud music for bumping and grinding, there's a number of urbanized places like Milk, Vinyl and the Bar Standard. But for the quiet guy who likes to pour his heart out, there's a cool little wine bar called The Living Room worth checking out.

  • pieter.morlion via flickr
    9 of 10

    New Orleans

    For the best in drunk, jazzy women, visit NOLA for some endless whiskey nights and wildly evocative dancing in the middle of Bourbon Street. New Orleans is quite the place for the wild at heart, hungry at stomach and poor at decisions, but that doesn't mean you can't meet a nice girl and have a semi-religious experience while you're in the Mardi Gras capital of America.

    There's plenty to do outside the way of belligerency too, as the city offers everything from football games to lake fishing, depending on what kind of ladies you like running into, dancing spandex girls or Daisy Dukes fishing with big rod. Clearly, New Orleans isn't the prime pick for places to meet a classy gal, but maybe classy isn't what you need, as you realize you haven't worn a shirt or underwear in more than three days.

  • cloganese via flickr
    10 of 10
    Next: The Sexiest Girls on Instagram

    Seattle

    For the beautiful, dark souls of the country who appreciate a good amount of rain and have either fear or hatred for the sun, Seattle is notorious for consoling their fragile bodies. Between the grunge rock history, abundance of sea lions and the fact that Seattle has more dogs than kids, you can see why it might be a tempting place to find someone of the fairer sex.

    With so many dog lovers, it might be time to adopt yourself a little pup, bust out the umbrella and hit up one of the many great dog parks in the area. Seattle is also home to some of the best-known coffee chains, including Starbucks and Seattle's Best. No reason you can't treat yourself to some fresh brewed joe and Washington women in one quick swoop.

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

The Kentucky Fried Movie: Jokes You'd Never be Able to Make Today

August 16, 2013, 1:26 am
$
0
0
  • aaltra94 via youtube
    1 of 10

    "The Kentucky Fried Movie," in case you're unfamiliar, is a 1977 cult oddity that launched the careers of writers David Zucker, Jerry Zucker, and Jim Abrahams (who would later go on to become kings of the spoof movie with "Airplane!") and director John Landis ("An American Werewolf in London," "The Blues Brothers"). A series of short, bizarre sketches built around an extended spoof of Bruce Lee's "Enter the Dragon" called "A Fistful of Yen," "The Kentucky Fried Movie" is loaded with the kind of outrageous shock humor you can't believe actually made it to movie screens - and would go over like a fart in the elevator in the more socially conscious 2000s. Here are the top ten examples of the outrageousness they got away with.

    10. ARGON OIL

    Not a minute into the movie, and already the Zuckers and Abrahams are on the offensive. In a skit about an oil company mining natural resources from bizarre places (the faces of teenagers, burping fast food customers), they mention that a large amount of their crude oil comes from combs collected from Italians. Not cool, capiche?

  • aaltra94 via youtube
    2 of 10

    9. CATHOLIC HIGH SCHOOL GIRLS IN TROUBLE

    The movie's fake trailer for an adult film has some groaners ("Linda Chambers recreating her classic role" as she rolls down a hill), some greats (the "show me your nuts" gag is still funny), and some, well, jaw-dropping inappropriateness. It opens with the line "More offensive than Mandingo" over a shot of a little girl in pigtails in bed with a large black man, then goes on to show a group of topless girls chained in a dungeon being whipped by a dwarf in a clown suit (a whole lot of wrong there) and finally accompanies the voice over call-out "Savage!" with a quick shot of African tribesmen. Borderline misogynist and more than a little racially insensitive? You could say that...

  • Klaus leuters via youtube
    3 of 10

    8. SCOT FREE

    This fake commercial for a family-friendly board game about the assassination of John F. Kennedy and the ensuing conspiracy theories and scandals is, on the surface, not THAT bad. But you have to imagine the idea of small kids moving assault rifle pieces around a board and discussing shooting the president would have wildly different connotations today.

  • markgreyeyes via youtube
    4 of 10

    7. UNITED APPEAL FOR THE DEAD

    Again, we're extremely sensitive these days to how kids are portrayed and treated on screen, even in adult comedies - so this faux medical infomercial about living with the "handicap" known as "death" and its imagery of the rotting corpse of a small child being dragged to football games and left floating face down in the pool would raise some ire.

  • aaltra94 via youtube
    5 of 10

    6. A FISTFUL OF YEN

    Overall, the "Enter the Dragon" spoof is harmless, and hilarious, and definitely feels more in line with "Airplane!" and "The Naked Gun" than anything else in this movie. Still, even though star Evan Kim is Asian, you'd have to assume that making fun of Bruce Lee's lispy, accent-heavy speech would have a lot of people clutching their pearls and crying racism at the white director for forcing the Asian actor to perform the cultural equivalent of Step 'n Fetchit.

  • huggy1959 via youtube
    6 of 10

    5. COURTROOM

    "Stenographer Gordon Simley had a sex change operation, and is now a switch hitter for the Atlanta Braves" is a joke in the film accompanied by a man in a frilly dress and hat holding a dildo. We can't see the transgender community taking that one well at all.

  • huggy1959 via youtube
    7 of 10

    4. NESSON OIL

    Just imagine the protests from PETA over the assertion that Nesson Oil is perfect for frying cats.

  • mromcocume via youtube
    8 of 10

    3. CLEOPATRA SCHWARTZ

    Another faux movie trailer, and one that is just a minefield from the word go. Promoting a blaxploitation flick about a kickass African-American woman and her Hassidic husband? There's no coming out of this one unscathed.

  • laden weird via youtube
    9 of 10

    2. ZINC OXIDE AND YOU

    The gag in this educational film is fairly simple - an omniscient narrator makes a woman's everyday household items disappear to prove the ubiquity of zinc oxide, with increasingly disastrous results. The problem comes from the condescending portrayal of "the housewife" (kerchief and apron on, natch) and the fact that one of the gags involves her adolescent son shooting himself with his own rifle and dying on the kitchen floor. Yeesh.

  • skrimps333
    10 of 10
    Next: Classic Movie Endings Changed By Text Messaging

    1. DANGER SEEKERS

    Whooo, boy. This one is just a jaw-dropper. We meet "Danger Seeker" and amateur daredevil Rex Kramer as he's about to perform his latest death-defying feat. He steps into a circle of black men rolling dice and proceeds to shout the N-word. With a hard "R" sound at the end, no less. This would be a career-ending gag today.

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧
↧

Signs It's a Very Slow News Day, Vol. 2

August 16, 2013, 1:41 am
$
0
0

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

Today's Funniest Photos 8-16-13

August 16, 2013, 1:44 am
$
0
0

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧
Search

This Week's 20 Funniest Tweets

August 16, 2013, 2:14 am
$
0
0

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

The Chaser: Is Dating a Friend A Good Idea?

August 16, 2013, 8:15 am
$
0
0


Can me and women just be friends? Can friends turn their platonic relationship into love? The Mandatory Chaser guys discuss the "40 Days of Dates" experiment taking place between two New York friends (one man, one woman) who were tired of the dating scene. So they decided to see if they could date each other (following a number of criteria) to see if they could turn their friendship into a successful romantic relationship.

Also check out last week's Chaser episode where we crown the NFL preseason champion.

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧
↧

Homemade Zipline Fail Results in Pain, Funny Noises

August 16, 2013, 9:13 am
$
0
0


Don't worry, he's fine. No, it doesn't sound like it, but he is. Really. There was a news report on him and everything.

Here are the facts: This is Larry Snyder of Federal Way, Washington and he fell 12 feet right onto his back because he decided to take a spin on his homemade zipline. Here's one more fact: you might never hear a funnier noise than the garbled wail coming out of Snyder after he hits the ground.

Via King 5 News

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

10 Criminals Who Got Away With Crazy Stuff In Prison

August 19, 2013, 12:51 am
$
0
0
  • Anne Arundel County Police
    1 of 10

    After binge-watching "Orange Is The New Black," we got curious as to exactly how much power and freedom inmates have when they're behind prison walls. Most of them don't have any, of course, but a few enterprising prisoners have managed to turn a stint in the pokey into a bizarre kind of vacation. Here's 10 stories of convicts who got away with some crazy stuff in prison.

    Tavon White

    One of the toughest things to get used to in jail is the lack of female companionship. For Black Guerilla gang member Tavon White, that was never a problem. The Baltimore kingpin got sent to the Baltimore City Detention Center on a racketeering charge and proceeded to turn the whole prison into his personal harem. White fathered five kids while he was in the clink - with four different female guards. Two of the guards even got his name tattooed on them! An investigation into increasing violence at the prison unearthed the depths of the corruption, with a total of 13 female guards indicted for conspiring with the Black Guerillas.

  • Mugshot
    2 of 10

    Bassam Hamzy

    Usually when high-level gangsters go to jail a power vacuum opens up at the top of their organizations, with subordinates squabbling to run things. Not so for Australia's brutal Brothers 4 Life gang. When leader Bassam Hamzy was brought in on murder charges in 1998, he took it as a challenge and continued to grow his criminal empire from behind bars. In 2008, he was caught with a mobile phone in his jail cell and it was soon discovered that he'd managed to orchestrate several shootings from the pen. Even in supermax custody he's managed to influence guards, pass contraband and make unauthorized phone calls.

  • PA
    3 of 10

    Iorworth Hoare

    Some guys have all the luck. That's the only way to explain the truly bizarre story of Iorworth Hoare, who was jailed for life in 1989 for attempted rape. The career criminal had multiple previous arrests on his record, so him dying in prison wasn't going to make anybody very sad. That is, until he bought a ticket in Britain's national lottery while on temporary release in 2004 and won the grand prize of $14 million. He couldn't spend a dime of it in jail, though, so it was a bit of a hollow victory. When he was finally released, he faced universal hatred and abuse everywhere he went.

  • Liputan 6
    4 of 10

    Freddy Budiman

    Prison corruption happens all over the world, but this Indonesian case is notable for just how much the inmate managed to get away with. Freddy Budiman was a Southeast Asian druglord known as the "Ecstasy King" for his dominance of the party pill trade, but he got caught trying to bring millions of pills into China and was sentenced to death. While he was on Death Row, Budiman managed to receive multiple conjugal visits with his hot model girlfriend Vanny Rossyanne. The pair would have special access to a warden's room, where they would smoke crystal meth and bang all day. Budiman would later get busted trying to smuggle meth while he was being transferred to another prison, which is a totally baller move.

  • AP Photo
    5 of 10

    Kevin Bell

    When you're in jail, you'll pull any string you can to get by. For some reason, South Carolina inmate Kevin Bell, who was serving a sentence for cocaine trafficking, managed to get close enough to his guards that they gave him a job selling things on eBay for them. He made over $20,000 doing this while he was in the pokey, and earned lots of other special privileges like day breaks to take his daughter to Chuck E Cheese. In total, he left the prison walls as many as a hundred times. Oh, and he was planning his upcoming wedding... to a female guard. That explains a lot.

  • Handout
    6 of 10

    Diego Perez Henao

    The Colombian drug cartels are some of the most feared criminal groups in the world, so it's no surprise that high-ranking cartel leaders manage to get all kinds of perks when they're in jail. Diego Perez Henao was the kingpin of the Rastrojos cartel until he got nabbed in Venezuela and deported to Colombia, where he was deposited in La Picota maximum security prison. La Picota is notorious for letting wealthy prisoners flaunt the rules, and Henao not only continues to oversee his gang's operations on a pair of smuggled BlackBerry phones but also gets regular visits from prostitutes to keep himself from getting too bored.

  • Thinkstock
    7 of 10

    Unnamed Mexican Prisoner

    Typically we try to only tell stories of prisoners we can identify, but this tale is so insane that it has to be mentioned. At Mexico's Cereso Hermosillo prison, a savvy inmate gained access to a hidden room that had been tricked out with all the amenities - a TV and DVD player, a working kitchen, even wood paneling. Instead of keeping it for himself, he set up a raffle system where for 200 pesos his fellow inmates could win a chance at a night in the luxury suite. He was eventually released, and soon after prison officials discovered the raffle scheme and shut down the secret room.

  • Unsolved Mysteries
    8 of 10

    Don Decker

    Here's a totally bizarre tale of a prisoner who got away with something more unusual than smuggling or illicit sex - he apparently contacted the spirit world while he was in jail, and nobody could explain it. Don Decker was in prison in 1983 for possession of stolen property. While in the clink, he was given a weekend furlough to go to his abusive grandfather's funeral. When he came back, something had changed in Decker - he could somehow create moisture indoors, making it rain in his jail cell. It sounds crazy, but there were dozens of witnesses who all testified under oath that it happened. Decker led an uneventful life until he was thrown back in prison in 2012 for arson.

  • Sonny Barker/facebook
    9 of 10

    Sonny Barker

    Prisoners in modern jails are given access to all kinds of amenities, but social media isn't supposed to be one of them. That didn't stop British thug Sonny Barker, in jail for robbing a home and holding a mother and daughter at knifepoint, from getting on Facebook and posting pictures of his posh living conditions for the world to see. Barker, along with cellmate Korrel Kennedy, smuggled in a BlackBerry and used it to post multiple pictures of his cell, complete with a PlayStation 2 and pictures of topless girls on the walls. He also bragged about how well he was doing in the clink and when he'd be out.

  • AP Photo
    10 of 10
    Next: The Most Epic Prison Escapes

    Pablo Escobar

    And, finally, one of the most insane cases of a prisoner getting away with things in prison comes with the construction of an entire prison. When Colombian drug legend Pablo Escobar was finally caught, as part of his plea deal with the government he won the right to build his own prison. La Catedral, as it would be named, was a posh paradise with a Jacuzzi, a soccer field and many other amenities. It was staffed by guards hand-picked by Escobar, to boot. Unfortunately, when he started bringing rivals to the prison to be tortured the government had to step in and transfer him to a more traditional prison after a little over a year.

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧

The Most Successful Scams and Schemers

August 19, 2013, 1:03 am
$
0
0
  • List Fave
    1 of 10

    Let's face it: honest work is for suckers. While you're slaving away at a computer/deep fryer/car-assembling-robot/stripper pole or whatever, someone much smarter and far less moral than you is raiding your retirement fund, often in a way that ensures they'll never be caught (or at least convicted).

    What follows is a list of scams and schemers who've managed to make mad bank while spending a minimum of time behind bars.

    JOSEPH "YELLOW KID" WEIL

    A con man famous even in an era dominated by con men, Joseph Weil dropped out of school at the age of seventeen to become a collector for a local Chicago loan shark.

    When Joseph noticed his fellow collectors were skimming profits, he organized his first protection racket-Weil wouldn't rat on them if he got a cut of their earnings. Weil soon rose to a sort of secret fame in the grifting underworld under the coaching of Frank Hogan, where he earned the "Yellow Kid" nickname after the popular Hogan's Alley and the Yellow Kid comic strip, but the Kid soon surpassed all of his tutors by making use of what his biographer called his "uncanny knowledge of human nature."

    Weil is estimated to have stolen more than eight million dollars during his criminal career, but only served two years in prison and died a free man at the age of 100.

  • Eastern Terraces
    2 of 10

    BERNARD CORNFELD AND INVESTORS OVERSEAS SERVICES

    Bernard Cornfeld got his start early, convincing a friend to use his insurance benefits to buy an age-and-weight guessing stand at Coney Island. After a brief stint as a social worker, Cornfeld founded Investors Overseas Services. it was a a complicated mutual fund operation that took advantage of the differences between different countries' financial regulations to dodge taxes and fees of all kinds.

    Just to name one example, IOS' headquarters were officially in Geneva, Switzerland, but the actual offices were located just over the border in France, circumventing the need to obtain Swiss work permits for the staff. By all accounts "Bernie" was an incredible salesman, and his natural talent combined with IOS' slippery business practices generated enormous cash dividends that Cornfeld funneled into a legendary party lifestyle.

    But he and his company were always just a hairs breadth from real legal trouble. Cornfeld was eventually muscled out of his own company for embezzlement (spending only 11 months in Swiss jail for his crimes) and did a brief stint in American prison for an unrelated telephone scam, but the brilliant con artist died wealthy, free and surrounded by supermodels in California.

  • Escreveretriste
    3 of 10

    JEFF "SOAPY" SMITH, COLORADO CON KING

    Jefferson Randolph Smith II was a master of the "short con," fast-acting low-profit scams that never aspired to rip off more than what a typical mark carried in his wallet.

    Smith earned the "Soapy" sobriquet from his most successful scam, known as "The Prize Soap Racket." Smith would hawk bars of completely ordinary soap as miracle cures and sweetened the deal by wrapping up a few bars with twenty, fifty, and hundred-dollar bills.

    A few of the "prize bars" would go to Smith's shills, but the others would pass through sleight-of-hand into his briefcase. The scheme was so successful that Soapy Smith ended up running a significant portion of Denver's gambling and vice markets.

    After a few years, Colorado governors started to close in on Soapy's rackets, but Smith simply relocated to Skagway, Alaska, focus of a new gold rush and a town even more lawless than Denver at its peak.

    Smith and his gang soon assumed so much power over the town that his saloon became known as "the real city hall," and no legal or governmental power could hope to challenge his power.

    Fortunately for the clean-living citizens of Skagway, Soapy pushed his luck when he challenged vigilante Frank Reid, and in what became known as the Shootout on Juneau Wharf the sudsy scofflaw took a bullet to the heart.

  • Wikimedia Commons
    4 of 10

    THE SUCKERS OF SUPERVALU

    The key to every really successful scam is choosing a good victim. The unknown and still un-caught con artists who ripped off Minnesota-based supermarket chain Supervalu to the tune of ten million dollars managed to find the mark every con man dreams of. All they needed to do was send two emails posing as representatives of Frito-Lay and American Greetings, claiming the companies had changed bank accounts and that further payments should be sent to a new address in Florida.

    Incredibly, no one at Supervalu bothered to double-check this information, and it was only after the real company reps called to ask where their money was that the supermarket realized its mistake.

    While the FBI was able to freeze most of the cash, the perps got away clean and Supervalu was left to fight over the remaining money between Frito-Lay and American Greetings.

    This sort of egregious screw-up could only have happened in the early days of business e-mail and electronic invoices, right? Wrong-the farcical affair occurred just six years ago.

  • Wikimedia Commons
    5 of 10

    THE LUCRATIVE GOSPEL OF BENNY HINN

    There have been a lot of bogus preachers that have preyed on the trust of innocent parishioners, but few have been as successful as Benny Hinn. Born Toufik Benedictus Hinn in Arabic Palestine, Benny's family emigrated to Toronto where his father claimed to be the former mayor of the Israeli city of Jaffa, establishing a solid foundation of lies that Hinn would build a commercial evangelical empire on.

    Benny Hinn's specialty was faith healing, particularly the well-publicized faith healing of disabled followers who would stagger onto his stage begging for relief from their wounds, receive a blast of holy gibberish, and walk away whole and hearty, casting off their casts and braces.

    Curiously, many pilgrims suffering from muscular dystrophy, cerebral palsy, and other visible disabilities often find themselves being ignored or even turned away by Hinn's screeners.

    Such activity (along with stunts like his 2006 request for donations towards a $36 million Gulfstream jet) has brought Hinn's ministry to the attention of both the United States government and the evangelical organization Ministry Watch.

    But unlike some other crooked televangelists, Benny has kept his nose clean and has so far managed to avoid having sex with men for crystal meth... or at least he's been pretty discreet about it.

  • Greatest Con Artists
    6 of 10

    THE MONA LISA CAPER OF 1911

    Argentine con man Eduardo "Marquis" de Valfierno had a master forger in his employ, six near-perfect copies of the Mona Lisa, and a tricky problem: no matter how good his forgeries were, nobody was going to buy one when the real Mona Lisa was quite obviously still on display in the Louvre.

    To solve this problem, de Valfierno reached out to his contacts in the Parisian criminal underworld in search of a thief capable of snatching one of the world's greatest art treasures from one of the world's greatest museums.

    When painter Louis Beroud arrived on the morning of August 22, 1911 to sketch the portrait he found only a blank space on the wall. In the ensuing investigation everyone from the Parisian mafia to Pablo Picasso was called in for questioning.

    In fact, the portrait had been stolen by Louvre employee and Italian patriot Vincenzo Peruggia, who intended to return the painting to its native Florence-de Valfierno paid the man a pittance to simply walk out of the museum with the portrait under his jacket and never contacted him again.

    With the painting stolen, the Marquis was able to sell his six forgeries to six different suckers, confident that none of the marks would ever find out about the others.

    As for the original, it was believed lost forever until Peruggia attempted to sell it to the Uffizi Gallery in Florence, for which he received a slap-on-the-wrist sentence of six months in jail while the famous painting toured Italy.

  • William Reese Company
    7 of 10

    STEPHEN BURROUGHS, "THE WORST BOY IN TOWN"

    Son of a stern Congregationalist minister, Stephen Burroughs was one of America's first folk heroes and/or supervillains, as well as a pretty solid example of how a religious upbringing is no guarantee of good behavior.

    After an infamously misspent youth involving brief stints in the Army, in college, and a tour on a privateer (where he pretended to be a doctor) Burroughs finally settled down in Massachusetts to a career of pretending to be a minister and seducing foxy schoolgirls.

    While this would be enough for most people, Burroughs decided to become one of America's first and most infamous counterfeiters, earning him several prison stays marked by the occasional spectacular escape attempt before he finally ran to Canada to establish a far more successful counterfeit ring.

    The charismatic crook was massively popular in his lifetime, and his memoirs became the young country's first best-seller. Burroughs supposedly reformed and lived out the rest of his life as a tutor for schoolchildren (although I'd think twice before having him look after the education of your foxy schoolgirl) but his legacy was such that for years, criminals would give the name Stephen Burroughs to the arresting officer.

  • Wikimedia Commons
    8 of 10

    GREGOR MACGREGOR, PRINCE OF POYAIS

    So full of vice they named him twice, Gregor MacGregor was a Scottish soldier, mercenary, and adventurer who got his start in the Napoleonic Wars before selling his commission and traveling to South America in search of more lucrative combat.

    A skilled warrior, MacGregor sold his talents to various rebel militaries before hitting his high point as the warlord of the "Republic of the Floridas," a short-lived microstate that he ran out of Amelia Island (just east of modern-day Jacksonville) until the money dried up and the sneaky Scotsman departed the New World only to embark on a new scheme.

    MacGregor convinced London high society that he was the cacique (meaning prince or high authority) of the Principality, Territory, or Republic of Poyais, depending on who he was talking to at the time.

    Eventually, he convinced some 240 colonists to invest in the settlement of a country that he described as fertile, civilized, and friendly to European settlers. The two boat-loads of would-be colonists arrived in the Bay of Honduras to find nothing more than a few huts constructed by American hermits and thousands of acres of hostile untamed jungle.

    A British ship from the real Honduras colony happened across MacGregor's diseased, starving settlers and offered them passage back to Britain, where despite their horrific ordeal the prospective Poyais colonists refused to place any blame on the charismatic Gregor MacGregor.

    That unshakeable loyalty to an obvious con man came in handy a year later when French authorities indicted MacGregor on fraud charges, charges he beat handily by claiming that basically everyone in his organization was guilty except himself.

    After subsequent Poyais schemes proved unsuccessful, MacGregor moved to Venezuela where he received a hero's welcome and a general's pension for his work in ensuring that nation's independence.

  • TimesCrest
    9 of 10

    THE NEFARIOUS MR. NATWARLAL

    Mithilesh Kumar Srivastava AKA "Natwarlal" is often compared to famed con artist George C. Parker, the man who sold the Brooklyn Bridge twice a week for years. The main difference between Natwarlal and Parker (and the reason Parker doesn't appear on this list) is that while Parker died serving life at Sing Sing Prison, Natwarlal was last seen at the age of 84 escaping police custody in a wheelchair.

    Born in the impoverished village of Bangra, Natwarlal was originally a lawyer before deciding upon a more lucrative and honest career selling the Taj Mahal, the Red Fort, the Indian Parliament House, and the personal residence of Indian president Dr. Rajendra Prasad.

    It was claimed that Natwarlal gave much of his ill-gotten gains to India's poor, and he soon became a folk hero and the subject of the much-loved masala movie "Mr. Natwarlal."

    Arrested a number of times, Natwarlal was always able to give the slip to his captors, and while his lawyer claims that he died in 2009 at the age of 95, no evidence has yet been produced that proves Natwarlal isn't simply planning the con to end all cons.

  • Wikimedia Commons
    10 of 10
    Next: The Most Absurd Conspiracies Ever

    THE ALBANIAN PYRAMID CRISIS

    There are many conflicting theories on how to best run a country's economy, but almost all of them would agree that whatever philosophy you subscribe to you probably shouldn't allow two-thirds of your citizens to invest half your country's GDP in Mafia-run Ponzi schemes.

    Unfortunately for the recently capitalist country of Albania, nobody had bothered to tell the citizens how to recognize a pyramid scheme and nobody had bothered to tell the government that they shouldn't publicly endorse said pyramid schemes.

    After duping the populace for a good five years, all the scam operations collapsed at more or less the same time, taking everybody's money with them.

    Suspecting government collusion with the gangster-run investment schemes, Albanian citizens in the southern port of Vlore attacked the headquarters of the local security forces. This lead to the abrupt collapse of the central government and a ten-day revolt/civil war where street gangs seized control of entire cities, mobs of rioting citizens broke into arms depots, and it was estimated that every Albanian man above the age of ten was carrying an assault rifle and a few hundred rounds of ammunition.

    After some 3800 deaths and the complete destruction of the national economy, the "Rescue Committee" of the opposition Socialist Party managed to stage national elections, somehow convincing an entire nation of people who had just seen their life savings disappear to stop shooting each other and blowing up banks.

    The chairmen of the various scam operations were convicted in absentia, but nobody in the still-ravaged country realistically expects them to show their faces in public.

 

Permalink | Email this | Comments

↧
Viewing all 11431 articles
Browse latest View live
Search

Latest Images

New $4.5 million East Bay trail path will connect bicyclists, pedestrians to...

New $4.5 million East Bay trail path will connect bicyclists, pedestrians to...

April 18, 2024, 11:05 am
Photographer Gifts for Clients / Print Packaging / 4x6 Photo Box by...

Photographer Gifts for Clients / Print Packaging / 4x6 Photo Box by...

April 17, 2024, 6:48 pm
Deepfake Video of Aamir Khan circulates Online

Deepfake Video of Aamir Khan circulates Online

April 17, 2024, 3:07 am
Very Hungry Caterpillar™ Shirt: World of Eric Carle™+ Little Goodall by...

Very Hungry Caterpillar™ Shirt: World of Eric Carle™+ Little Goodall by...

April 14, 2024, 8:14 am
Have you seen Michael Wines? Burien man has been missing since Saturday,...

Have you seen Michael Wines? Burien man has been missing since Saturday,...

April 12, 2024, 3:59 pm
Stay Salty POTS Awareness Stretchy Stacking Bracelets | Set of Three|...

Stay Salty POTS Awareness Stretchy Stacking Bracelets | Set of Three|...

April 11, 2024, 5:27 pm
19 Reader-Favourite March Purchases — From Steals To Splurges

19 Reader-Favourite March Purchases — From Steals To Splurges

April 11, 2024, 5:07 am
Fake lip ring, silver lip ring, simple lip ring, unisex lip ring by AIRlab

Fake lip ring, silver lip ring, simple lip ring, unisex lip ring by AIRlab

April 9, 2024, 4:00 pm
People's Blog • First Pictures of the Eclipse ! ! !

People's Blog • First Pictures of the Eclipse ! ! !

April 8, 2024, 1:08 pm
People's Blog • First Pictures of the Eclipse ! ! !

People's Blog • First Pictures of the Eclipse ! ! !

April 8, 2024, 1:08 pm