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Today's Funniest Photos 9-10-13

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Ask Mandatory: We Answer All Your Important Questions

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Each week we answer your most important questions. And questions that aren't important at all. This week we tackle such pressing issues as "what to have for lunch today" and "cupcakes." Hard hitting stuff.

And while you're here, be sure to follow our Youtube channel so you can stay up-to-date with Ask Mandatory and all of our awesome videos (including one about pooping).

 

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Land of Opportunity: Immigrants Who Have Made It Big In America

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Sex Toys: A Provocative Look at the Billion Dollar Industry

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Most everyone loves sex. And most everyone loves toys. So why does the subject of sex toys have to be taboo? It turns out that it doesn't. As this infographic illustrates, the use of "adult" products is common in the bedroom, and the vast majority (94 percent) of people polled feel that sex toys are part of a healthy relationship. For more sexy facts on the topic, just scroll down. And check out Adam & Eve's online store to do more "research" (Warning: adult content).

 

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Jackie Chan's Facebook Page Is Truly Spectacular

Celebrities in Juggalo Makeup

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Super-Sized Candy Will Make You Hungry (And a Little Sick)

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Today's Funniest Photos 9-11-13

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A Guide to Popular College Majors

ThisIsMarkTwain@AOL.com: Episode 1

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What would happen if great American novelist Mark Twain had to work for a modern-day social media company? How would he, a man of such distinguished letters, keep his thoughtful musings to under 140 characters? Mandatory.com's new Web series, ThisIsMarkTwain@AOL.com, answers both of those very important questions.

Subscribe to Mandatory.com's YouTube channel for all our original videos.

 

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Downloaded: The Napster Documentary You Need to See

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Downloaded, director Alex Winter's documentary recalls the groundbreaking launch of Napster and the legal battles that sank the company. Downloaded focuses on two teenage friends, Shawn Fanning and Sean Parker, who came up with a groundbreaking internet start-up while they were in college, dropped out and moved to northern California to launch their company. The first portion of the documentary is viewable in this clip.

Watch Next Chapter Here

 

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The Most Important Deleted Scenes Of All Time

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20 Movies We Wish Were on Netflix

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Today's Funniest Photos 9-12-13

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The Most Tired and Overused Lines in Entertainment History

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There are only so many words and ways to perfectly articulate a situation, so unfortunately for the entertainment industry, writers often rely on the work of their predecessors. Below are some examples of the most overused lines in film and television history, but there are obviously many more. Let us know what we left out.

"You just don't get it, do you?"
Sometimes writers just don't get that people don't say this line nearly as often as they think.



"Keep your friends close and your enemies closer."
Yes, we agree that in dire circumstances, this is the best course of action. But can't we come up with a better way of saying it? Here's a suggestion: "Take your family to dinner but sit next to the uncle who you may have to stop from making a racist joke."

tom cruise, top gun maverick
"If I told you, I'd have to kill you."
Ah yes, the most pointlessly cliché line in history. Couldn't you just threaten to shave their pets, making them completely unwalkable in public? That should suffice.





"This ends NOW."
The creepy neighbor peeping through your daughter's window after you specifically asked him not to? The local kids keep leaving flaming bags of shit on your doorstep? Your best friend caught sleeping with your wife? You pick the situation. It all ends now.

"Guys, we've got company."
[Enter monster we have been waiting all movie to see but now we are about to be disappointed] Yes, thank you to the girl who got this line in the film because she has nothing else of value to say.

"You should see the other guy."
Classic badass line to take the focus off how badly you had your ass kicked.



"I've GOT to get me one of those!"
Usually prefaced by a fast car or shiny gadget, sometimes a sexy decoy with big cans.

"Don't worry, I've done this a million times."
This line usually comes before car crashes and explosions. Even if you have done it a million times, you'll f*ck it up horribly just by saying it.

"I feel like I don't even know you anymore."
There are many variations of this heartbreaking line in the entertainment kingdom. It is typically delivered once an established good guy character goes through harsh changes and comes out evil on the other side. A recent example of this is from "Breaking Bad."



"You're gonna pay for that."
And yet, they rarely mention the price of the thing you're going to pay for. Must be one of those gypsy markets where anything goes.

"That's Mr. ___ to you."
Whether you're Mr. Asshole or Mr. Peeping Tom, it's good to have a certain level of respect thrown your way.

"I've got a bad feeling about this."
Everybody has a bad feeling, and they're also sick of you making clear observations seem like genius revelations. Hopefully you'll be killed off next, but you'll probably be the one we have to see the most of in the end...especially when it comes to "Star Wars."



"I'd like to see you try."
A common manly line used to make women remember how weak and inferior they are when it comes to household repairs or fixing cars. It's usually followed swiftly by women using their brains instead of brawn and solving the problem.

"You wanna take this outside?"
Because getting your ass kicked in the street in front of tons more people is so much better than in the cushioned booth of a comfy bar stocked with ice. In real life, nobody asks to take it outside.

"We're gonna need a bigger boat."
A classic case of an iconic quote that has been referenced or parodied too many times on film and TV. Originally, the line was delivered by Brody in "Jaws," who actually said, "You're gonna need a bigger boat."
brody jaws, gonna need a bigger boat

"Well if you're so smart, you do it."
The setting of this quote is usually a failed swing set assembly or Christmas light hanging.

"You sound just like your mother."
This is an overused line you'll hear in sitcoms, when either a dad is tired of his kid's crap, or a husband is peeved that he married the equivalent of his mother-in-law. Or it could just be a joke on "Saved by the Bell."


"Hey, nobody's perfect."
Except Jesus, of course. Nobody every points that out.

"I'm getting too old for this shit"
Typically only used by men who have been in the game too long or were forced into an unwanted trilogy (or more) by the industry and their wad of cash. This one goes down as the key phrase for a dying franchise, and nobody did it better than Murtaugh.

 

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A Map of the Most Famous Athlete From Each State

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The Longer You're At The Gym

The Funniest GIFs of the Week - 9-12-13

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'Food Mashups' Presents Cheeseburger Hot Wings

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If you are not subscribed to Tasted on YouTube, you are missing out on some quality original food content that you won't find anywhere else. Their most recent sensation is a series called "Food Mashups," in which the star of the show "Cheffy" prepares a mashup of two or more delicious foods that you probably never thought to combine before. This episode mooshes wings and burgers together, but there is so much more. Check it out.

 

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Nikki Walton is a Sexy Wallflower

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