The Weirdest Experiments Scientists Performed on Themselves
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Passive-Aggressive Holiday Insult Generator
Passive-Aggressive Insults You'll Hear From Your Family During the Holidays
The holidays are a time for eating, drinking and getting insulted by your family members. Click the button below to see all the passive-aggressive insults you can expect to hear from your relatives this holiday season.
Also check out: Married Couple Quote Machine, The Hipster Baby Name Generator, Mitch Hedberg Quote Generator, Ralph Wiggum's Guide to Life, The Excuse Creator, DJ Name Generator and our Accountant Name Generator
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Funny and Awesome Etsy Cross-Stitch
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Today's Funniest Photos 11-20-13
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Ask Mandatory - Episode 7: Things Get Messy
On this week's "Ask Mandatory," the staff once again answers your very important questions about people with funny names (like John Boehner), toilet paper problems and fat asses. As you will see, things get a little disgusting, but then transition into sexy by the end.
For more fun, original content, subscribe to Mandatory's YouTube channel.
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Sandra Nilsson Proves Not All Sexy Swedes Are Blondes
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16 Album Covers With Lead Singers Standing Obnoxiously in Front
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History's Most Notable Killers for Hire
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Thanksgiving Cocktail Recipes to Be Very Thankful For
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Today's Funniest Photos 11-21-13
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Other Famous People With Owen Wilson's Nose
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Your Guide to Safely Tackling an NFL Quarterback in 2013
With the news that San Francisco 49ers linebacker Ahmad Brooks was fined over 15 grand for essentially hitting New Orleans Saints quarterback Drew Brees too hard, it's become very clear that the NFL will stop at nothing to protect its precious quarterbacks. For defensive players who have been raised to do only one thing - hit the quarterback really hard - fines like these send a very mixed message. In order to clear up any confusion, we've put together this helpful chart to explain how you can safely tackle the quarterback in the NFL in 2013. Hope it helps.
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The Funniest GIFs of the Week - 11-21-13
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Clemson Marching Band Pulls Off Amazing Nintendo-themed Halftime Show
Who needs a good football game when you have a halftime show like this? The Clemson University marching band put on a spectacular display of musicianship and choreography at halftime of their football game against Georgia Tech.
In addition to playing classic theme songs from the games Super Mario Bros. and The Legend of Zelda, the band members also morphed into a variety of characters from each game. The group started the show in the formation of a giant video game controller before kicking into the six-minute performance. All the action was caught by a fan from up in the nose bleeds.
Oh yeah, Clemson also won the football game, 55-31, so it wasn't just video game fans who went home happy.
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Boyfriend's Anniversary Prank Goes Horribly Wrong
So this guy thought it would be funny to set up a hidden camera and prank his girlfriend by telling her that he cheated. Seems kind of cruel, but he probably understands her sense of humor better than we do. Then again, maybe not, because his girlfriend's reaction brings about her own admission and sends the original prankster into hysterics. The lesson: Don't pull off twisted pranks unless you can handle what you dish out.
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Karlee Ironside Shows Off Her Sexy Side
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Girls Are Assholes: At A Bar
"Girls Are Assholes" is a web series about, well... girls being assholes. And apparently this is never more evident than when they're at a bar. Watch as some poor guy goes through something we've all experienced at some point in our lives.
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Gamblin' With Gary: 11-22-13
If you're like me, simply watching sports isn't enough. Sure, I enjoy a good rivalry game or an exciting comeback as much as the next guy, but unless I have a little action on it, it's not the same. So I enjoy placing a few bets every weekend to make things more interesting. You may say I have a problem; I say I have a solution. These bets are 100 PERCENT GUARANTEED TO MAKE US ALL RICH, and I am willing to share them with you to prove it. Last week I did not lose, going 3-0-1 and demonstrating my sports wagering greatness. This week you can expect more of the same, as I have another four picks sure to come through. I'm putting my money where my mouth is. Feel free to join me.
![Penn State Minnesota Football]()
CAN'T LOSE BET #1 (College Football)
Wisconsin at Minnesota (+17) - Minnesota +17
I'm not going to sugar-coat this: I hate Wisconsin. They have already burned me twice this season, as I bet against them when they played Iowa and BYU and they won and covered both games. This is it, though. The Badgers have not lost ATS all season, but Minnesota is the perfect team to put a stop to that. They are 5-1 at home with a couple high quality wins, and they play good defense. Wisconsin has not lost since September and recently demolished Indiana (pff, big deal), but there's no reason they should be favored by this much on the road against a fellow 8-2 team. Also, the public is backing Wisconsin at more than 70 percent so you know what that means -- jump all over the Golden Gophers with the points.
CAN'T LOSE BET #2 (College Football)
![Texas Tech Baylor Football]()
Baylor at Oklahoma St. - UNDER 80
Amazingly, this is not the highest point total on the board this week. That would be the Indiana-Ohio St. game (82), but don't mess with that. Baylor scores a ton of points and OSU can light it up, too, but the thing is both of these teams can also play some defense. Baylor has given up less than 17 pts/game over the last four games, and OSU has allowed 18 pts/game over the last five. So something's gotta give, and I expect the defenses to step up and make this not quite the barnburner everyone expects. Also, the point total in the Baylor game last week was 97, so a lot of idiots are just going to assume the over is a lock this week, too. That's exactly what Vegas wants. Bet the under...hard.
CAN'T LOSE BET #3
![Lions Steelers Football]()
Pittsburgh (+1) at Cleveland - Pittsburgh +1
This one is pretty simple. Here are two teams in the terrible AFC North, both are 4-6 but still have an outside shot at winning the division and a decent chance of nabbing the final wild card spot. One is led by 2-time Super Bowl winning quarterback Ben Roethlisberger, and the other is led by a perennial backup QB who only starts games because of injuries -- Jason Campbell. The fact that the Steelers are still getting a point in this game makes it a no-brainer. Take Pittsburgh all the way to the bank.
CAN'T LOSE BET #4 and #5
Jacksonville (+10) at Houston - Jacksonville +10 and OVER 43.5
Did I say I had four sure-fire picks for you this week? My bad, because I actually have five with this parlay bonus that is going to make you rich. Now before you call me crazy, let me give you some pertinent info. First, the Jags have won two games ATS all season -- their last two road games. I fully expect them to play hard on the road again this week and keep it close. Secondly, the Texans are just 1-4 at home this season (0-5 ATS), and look like they have completely lost their way. There's no reason they should be favored by ten points. As for the over, every single Houston home game has gone over this year, and Jags road games have seen the over go 4-1. That's a winning combo, especially when the two teams on the field probably won't care much about playing defense this week. Boom.
![Jaguars Titans Football]()
CAN'T LOSE BET #1 (College Football)
Wisconsin at Minnesota (+17) - Minnesota +17
I'm not going to sugar-coat this: I hate Wisconsin. They have already burned me twice this season, as I bet against them when they played Iowa and BYU and they won and covered both games. This is it, though. The Badgers have not lost ATS all season, but Minnesota is the perfect team to put a stop to that. They are 5-1 at home with a couple high quality wins, and they play good defense. Wisconsin has not lost since September and recently demolished Indiana (pff, big deal), but there's no reason they should be favored by this much on the road against a fellow 8-2 team. Also, the public is backing Wisconsin at more than 70 percent so you know what that means -- jump all over the Golden Gophers with the points.
CAN'T LOSE BET #2 (College Football)
Baylor at Oklahoma St. - UNDER 80
Amazingly, this is not the highest point total on the board this week. That would be the Indiana-Ohio St. game (82), but don't mess with that. Baylor scores a ton of points and OSU can light it up, too, but the thing is both of these teams can also play some defense. Baylor has given up less than 17 pts/game over the last four games, and OSU has allowed 18 pts/game over the last five. So something's gotta give, and I expect the defenses to step up and make this not quite the barnburner everyone expects. Also, the point total in the Baylor game last week was 97, so a lot of idiots are just going to assume the over is a lock this week, too. That's exactly what Vegas wants. Bet the under...hard.
CAN'T LOSE BET #3
Pittsburgh (+1) at Cleveland - Pittsburgh +1
This one is pretty simple. Here are two teams in the terrible AFC North, both are 4-6 but still have an outside shot at winning the division and a decent chance of nabbing the final wild card spot. One is led by 2-time Super Bowl winning quarterback Ben Roethlisberger, and the other is led by a perennial backup QB who only starts games because of injuries -- Jason Campbell. The fact that the Steelers are still getting a point in this game makes it a no-brainer. Take Pittsburgh all the way to the bank.
CAN'T LOSE BET #4 and #5
Jacksonville (+10) at Houston - Jacksonville +10 and OVER 43.5
Did I say I had four sure-fire picks for you this week? My bad, because I actually have five with this parlay bonus that is going to make you rich. Now before you call me crazy, let me give you some pertinent info. First, the Jags have won two games ATS all season -- their last two road games. I fully expect them to play hard on the road again this week and keep it close. Secondly, the Texans are just 1-4 at home this season (0-5 ATS), and look like they have completely lost their way. There's no reason they should be favored by ten points. As for the over, every single Houston home game has gone over this year, and Jags road games have seen the over go 4-1. That's a winning combo, especially when the two teams on the field probably won't care much about playing defense this week. Boom.
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The Celebrity Nude Leaked Photos Report Card
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A Day in the Life of a Jacksonville Jaguar Fan
Let's face it, if you're a Jacksonville Jaguars fan, not a lot is going right for you these days. The team has one pathetic win this year, and somehow things actually look worse every week. But what if their terrible luck isn't just limited to football and their taste in football teams actually affects their every day life. Here's a look at a day in the life of a Jaguars fan.
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8:00am - Wake up...because there's a hole in the waterbed and it's spouting out stagnant water like some sort of condemned geyser.
8:30am - Get in the shower, but instead of hot water coming through the faucet, it's raw sewage. How is this even possible?
8:45am - Time to brush your teeth. The toothpaste tastes weird for some reason. It's a tube of Preparation H.
9:00am - Leave for work but you notice something about your car. Just like Maurice Jones-Drew, it won't run.
9:15am - Try to call one of your co-workers to pick you up, but your phone is exactly like all of the Jaguars' wideouts: no reception.
10:00am - Arrive to work, only to find out your company has moved from Jacksonville to Los Angeles.
10:30am - Walking down the street, someone offers you drugs. You turn them down and alert an officer. It was Justin Blackmon. He's now suspended indefinitely.
Noon - Go to lunch at a local diner. You order a sandwich, but the waiter throws it three tables away from you. It's Chad Henne. You still have to pay for the meal.
1:30pm - Swing by CVS to grab a soda, but they're out of everything except this:
2:30pm - Blaine Gabbert is walking down the street and waves. You put up your hand to high five him and he swings his hand, but misses by a good 5 feet.
4:00pm - Try to listen to some music, but your Zune freezes up and gives this message. Also, a Zune? Seriously?
5:00pm - Might as well grab dinner out. Taco Bell for 3 Chalupa Supremes with extra lettuce. The next day, this photo shows up on the news:
5:45pm - Get home and check the mail. There's an envelope from Netflix. They mixed up the account and sent you 3 copies of "Grown Ups 2."
7:00pm - Time to watch a little television before bed, but a tape is stuck in the VCR and won't turn off. It's this:
8:00pm - Might as well go on to bed, but the waterbed has a hole in it. Good thing there's an air mattress.
8:02pm - There's a hole in the mattress as big as the ones in the Jaguars' defensive line. Looks like you're sleeping on the floor tonight.
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