Zuleyka Silver Is Better Than Gold
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How to Completely Erase Yourself From the Internet
Have you ever wished you could completely scrub yourself off the Internet? All of those vital pieces of information about how old you are, where you work, what you like to shop for, who your friends are and on and on and on, all of which have been gathered slowly over time thanks to incessant updates on social media and pointless Google searches. It may seem like a daunting task to get rid of all that, but this step by step guide will help you totally disappear online. (Until you crack three days later and re-open your Facebook account.)
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Via Tumblr
Via Tumblr
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Ridiculous Lays Potato Chip Flavors Won't Make You Hungry But Will Make You Laugh
So for the second time, Frito Lay has decided that it's a good idea to give free reign to the Internet to name a new flavor of their potato chips. Not surprisingly, a lot of people took the idea and ran with it in the weirdest possible directions. I'm sure there are plenty of legitimate suggestions out there but for my money, these are the most important contributions to the contest.
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Via Tumblr
Via Tumblr
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Suspected Domestic Violence Turns Out to Be Pig Orgy
What does it sound like when one male pig is balls-deep in five sows? According to a woman in China, Maine, it sounds a lot like a domestic disturbance.
![pig sex mistaken for domestic violence, pigs humping]()
Four Maine state troopers were called to a home last week after one neighbor reported hearing what she thought was screaming related to domestic abuse. But according to the police report, the officers were told the screams were instead coming from a male pig who was "in a pen with five other female pigs in heat."
Or in other words, this male pig had just hit the jackpot.
The report also noted that police determined there was no assault and no disturbance "other than the screaming male pig." However, there was no mention of just how in the hell the woman who phoned police had no idea she was living next to a pig farm.
(via Kennebec Journal)
More sexy than six pigs going at it: The Best Animal Selfies to Ever Grace the Internet
Four Maine state troopers were called to a home last week after one neighbor reported hearing what she thought was screaming related to domestic abuse. But according to the police report, the officers were told the screams were instead coming from a male pig who was "in a pen with five other female pigs in heat."
Or in other words, this male pig had just hit the jackpot.
The report also noted that police determined there was no assault and no disturbance "other than the screaming male pig." However, there was no mention of just how in the hell the woman who phoned police had no idea she was living next to a pig farm.
(via Kennebec Journal)
More sexy than six pigs going at it: The Best Animal Selfies to Ever Grace the Internet
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Ireland Baldwin Has a Bangin' Bod
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Surveillance Camera Catches Suspected Thief Humping a Mannequin
Here's a guy who won't be babysitting our kids.
A Brazilian man known only as "Bruno" has been accused of stealing discount clothing during a robbery last week in the town of Jaragua, which on its own is disturbing enough. I mean, discount clothing?
But after this surveillance camera footage of Bruno bumping uglies with one of the store's mannequins was posted on YouTube, we're sure he wishes the theft charge was the only thing he had to answer to.
Yup. That was just a video of a suspected thief going to town on a mannequin's cans, masturbating, and then walking away, but not before turning back to double check that, yes indeed, he just gave the business to a headless piece of plastic. Throw in the fact the mannequin was also a double-amputee, and there's no denying it: We're dealing with one sick son of a bitch here.
According to the local newspaper, Bruno told police he sold the stolen clothing to pay for drugs, but he refused to talk about giving the mannequin a little slap and tickle. And considering the mannequin is missing a head and a pulse, we'll assume she isn't saying much about it either.
(via Huffington Post)
You think this clown has problems? Check out this guy: Drunk Man Crashes Into Restaurant Then Gets Out And Masturbates
A Brazilian man known only as "Bruno" has been accused of stealing discount clothing during a robbery last week in the town of Jaragua, which on its own is disturbing enough. I mean, discount clothing?
But after this surveillance camera footage of Bruno bumping uglies with one of the store's mannequins was posted on YouTube, we're sure he wishes the theft charge was the only thing he had to answer to.
Yup. That was just a video of a suspected thief going to town on a mannequin's cans, masturbating, and then walking away, but not before turning back to double check that, yes indeed, he just gave the business to a headless piece of plastic. Throw in the fact the mannequin was also a double-amputee, and there's no denying it: We're dealing with one sick son of a bitch here.
According to the local newspaper, Bruno told police he sold the stolen clothing to pay for drugs, but he refused to talk about giving the mannequin a little slap and tickle. And considering the mannequin is missing a head and a pulse, we'll assume she isn't saying much about it either.
(via Huffington Post)
You think this clown has problems? Check out this guy: Drunk Man Crashes Into Restaurant Then Gets Out And Masturbates
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Florida Man Thinks Monkey Is Breaking Into Cars
Maybe it was the banana stuck in the passenger-side key hole. Maybe it was the remnants of feces thrown at the windshield. We weren't there, so we can't say for sure.
But at least one resident in a Florida town thinks the recent string of car break-ins in the area can be blamed on - wait for it - a damn, dirty ape.
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According to WTVT-TV in Tampa, a resident in the nearby town of Apollo Beach claims to have recently photographed a loose rhesus macaque monkey in the neighborhood, and he now thinks it is responsible for two break-ins.
Corey Beckman, who works for WTVT-TV as a photojournalist, said his cars were clearly broken into, but nothing was taken:
You'd think anybody breaking into a car would find it nice seeing a GPS there and an iPod but they just left it all sitting here. What does a monkey need with an iPod? Maybe it didn't like my music.
Well, that all depends on how many Creed songs were on that iPod, Corey.
(via UPI)
More monkeying around: Monkeys, Gorillas and Apes Mooning You
But at least one resident in a Florida town thinks the recent string of car break-ins in the area can be blamed on - wait for it - a damn, dirty ape.
According to WTVT-TV in Tampa, a resident in the nearby town of Apollo Beach claims to have recently photographed a loose rhesus macaque monkey in the neighborhood, and he now thinks it is responsible for two break-ins.
Corey Beckman, who works for WTVT-TV as a photojournalist, said his cars were clearly broken into, but nothing was taken:
You'd think anybody breaking into a car would find it nice seeing a GPS there and an iPod but they just left it all sitting here. What does a monkey need with an iPod? Maybe it didn't like my music.
Well, that all depends on how many Creed songs were on that iPod, Corey.
(via UPI)
More monkeying around: Monkeys, Gorillas and Apes Mooning You
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These Photos Will Make Sure You Are Scared Of Heights
I don't know how these photos were taken or if they are real or if any of the people in them are still alive. All I know is after looking at this collection, I will forever be scared of heights.
Via Web of Epic
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Florida Man Asked to Stop Masturbating in Front of Window Sets Building on Fire Instead
Well, that escalated rather quickly.
What seems on the surface like a pretty simple and legitimate request for a 58-year-old man to stop tugging on his yogurt-slinger in front of his open windows and front door somehow led to first-degree arson charges after the man reportedly responded to the complaint by setting the building on fire.
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No one was injured in the blaze, but four families were left homeless and 28 units had to be evacuated. But it's tough to say how long they'll be scarred with the mental image of Kenneth Haskins rubbing one out while standing in his doorway for the entire complex to see:![kenneth haskins masturbate arson]()
Police didn't confirm whether or not he saw The Ring earlier this week, but did say Haskins shot himself in the face with a shotgun years ago, resulting in the cross between Rocky Dennis and a bald Kenny Rogers seen in his mugshot. Yikes.
Haskins is being held without bail at the Orient Road Jail, where we're pretty sure they'll have a different way of "requesting" that he stops spanking it.
(via Tampa Bay Times)
More trials and tribulations of 'Florida Man' - Florida Man: The Comic
What seems on the surface like a pretty simple and legitimate request for a 58-year-old man to stop tugging on his yogurt-slinger in front of his open windows and front door somehow led to first-degree arson charges after the man reportedly responded to the complaint by setting the building on fire.
No one was injured in the blaze, but four families were left homeless and 28 units had to be evacuated. But it's tough to say how long they'll be scarred with the mental image of Kenneth Haskins rubbing one out while standing in his doorway for the entire complex to see:
Police didn't confirm whether or not he saw The Ring earlier this week, but did say Haskins shot himself in the face with a shotgun years ago, resulting in the cross between Rocky Dennis and a bald Kenny Rogers seen in his mugshot. Yikes.
Haskins is being held without bail at the Orient Road Jail, where we're pretty sure they'll have a different way of "requesting" that he stops spanking it.
(via Tampa Bay Times)
More trials and tribulations of 'Florida Man' - Florida Man: The Comic
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