There's Something About Rachel Stevens
↧
↧
Amazon's New Mystery Product Has Been Revealed
And boy, this thing is going to be revolutionary.
Last week, you may have seen the video of customers looking down amazed at this new device Amazon is launching on June 18th. It was quite the tease, as they don't actually show the product, but it has really gotten the tech world giddy with anticipation. Well, we were fortunate enough to also get the mystery device sent to our office, and after testing it out, we feel that we have to share it with you now. Nobody should have to wait until the 18th to know what marvel is in store for all of us. Save up your money, because you are going to want this thing right away.
↧
Today's Funniest Photos
↧
14 Weird Things Governments Around the World Have Banned
Everyone loves complaining about the government and how much they screw up the country, but sometimes the powers that be take it a bit too far. We're all looking at you, North Korea. Here are a few of the most over the top and bizarre government bans from around the world.
1. Mullets
Where: Iran
When: 2010
Why: The country said they were tired of men having what they described as "Western haircuts" and banned multiple hairstyles, including the infamous mullet. Ponytails were also banned, as a catalog was released showing what styles were permissible. You are still allowed to use a little bit of gel, though, if that's any consolation.
2. Unauthorized Reincarnation
Where: China
When: 2007
Why: This one is pretty bizarre, but China regulated reincarnation stating that, unless you were giving permission by the government, Buddhist monks in Tibet are not allowed to reincarnate. Even the Dalai Lama has said he refuses to be reborn in Tibet until it's no longer under Chinese control. That'll show them!
3. Unapproved Baby Names
Where: Denmark
When: 2004
Why: Denmark got tired of celebrities, and the non-famous eccentric parents, naming their children ridiculous names, so they came up with an extreme solution. The government put together a list of approximately 24,000 approved baby names and if you had a child in Denmark, you had to pick one from that list. It may seem absurd, but at least it would prevent anyone else from naming their child Apple.
4. Time Travel
Where: China
When: 2011
Why: The Chinese government really likes banning things that don't exist. I would love to be in one of the meetings where they decide what to outlaw next. In 2011, they put a ban on time travel, but if you had the ability, couldn't you just travel back to a time before they outlawed it? I mean, if you wanted to make sure your time travel was within government regulations, of course.
5. Baby Walkers
Where: Canada
When: 2004
Why: You know those magical little wheeled playsets you put your toddler in so they don't run out the front door while you're cooking lunch? Those are illegal in Canada. The country felt that they're too dangerous so, not only are they outlawed, but if you're caught with one in your possession you could get fined up to $100,000 or even serve jail time. Do you think there are underground baby walker dealers in Montreal? I like to think so.
6. Homework
Where: France
When: Almost in 2012
Why: OK, so this one hasn't gone into full effect yet, but in 2012 French President Francois Hollande became the hero of every 6th grader when he said that he plans to abolish homework. He wanted to put more of a focus on in-class education and claimed that the majority of homework was just busy work. Finally, something a politician says that I 100% agree with.
7. Video Games
Where: China
When: 2000
Why: The government felt like children and teens were wasting too much time playing video games, so instead of setting a limit on playtime or regulating them, they banned video games completely. The ban was lifted in January 2014, which I'm sure resulted in numerous GTA and Skyrim marathons.
8. Emo Fashion
Where: Russia
When: 2008
Why: Russia must really hate My Chemical Romance. In 2008, the country banned emo clothing because they felt it led to depression and suicidal behavior. Despite protests the bill outlawed teens from wearing everything from face piercings to black hair with bangs.
9. Chewing Gum
Where: Singapore
When: 1992
Why: The only way you're allowed to chew gum in Singapore is if it's for therapeutic value and has been prescribed by a doctor. Other than that, the ban is strictly enforced with a $500 fine. The ban originated in 1992 when the government claimed vandals were leaving gum all over floors and public walkways, and on elevator buttons. The ban is still in place so if you visit Singapore, leave the Doublemint at home.
10. Yellow Clothing
Where: Malaysia
When: 2011
Why: After a protesting activist group had caused a bit of a headache for the government, they responded in an extreme manner. The group was known for wearing yellow shirts, so therefore all yellow clothing became illegal. Seems sensible? The ban wasn't limited to just shirts, but any clothing or accessories that were yellow was considered a sign of protest and, therefore, illegal.
11. Claire Danes
Where: Manila
When: 1998
Why: Don't ask any of your friends in Manila if they've seen "My So-Called Life." After it was revealed that Danes said Manila was "smelly, rat-infested and weird," the city took offense. Not only did they ban Danes from returning, they also banned all of her movies and television shows.
12. Cell Phones
Where: Cuba
When: Anytime Before 2008
Why: Cell phones were only permitted for executives working for foreign companies or the highest-ranking government officials. This should come as no surprise considering the amount of censorship Cuba has enforced over the years. The ban was lifted in 2008, but since most Cubans only made about $20 per month at the time, the general population really couldn't afford them. Now around a half a million Cubans have cell phones in the country.
13. Haggis
Where: United States
When: 1989
Why: In the late '80s, the US feared that sheep organs were not only unhealthy, but could be lethal. As a prevention, the government banned haggis, which is traditionally made with sheep lungs. The ban was lifted 21 years later in 2010, but I still think I'll pass on eating sheep lungs.
14. Scrabble
Where: Romania
When: Late 1980s
Why: Before Nicolae Ceausescu left power, he made one last bizarre and terrible decision - he banned Scrabble. What possible reason could you have for banning a game that simply involves spelling words? He said it was too intellectual and therefore must be subversively evil. Out of all the things in the world to consider evil, Scrabble has never come to mind. If Ceausescu saw "Jumanji," his head would explode.
↧
10 Abandoned Amusement Parks of America
↧
↧
Kanye West Quotes Are the Absolute Worst Quotes
Newsflash: Kanye West has a gigantic ego. For those of you that have somehow completely missed this fact, here is your chance to join in on the loathing. USA Today's Kanye West Self-Confidence Generator brings some of the most ridiculous things the producer, rapper and husband to Kim Kardashian has ever said right before your very eyes. Come to think of it, these are so bad ... are we absolutely sure he isn't somehow related to Jaden Smith?
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
↧
Street Talk With Alison Becker: Episode One
Welcome to our weekly series where our host, comedian and actor Alison Becker, runs up on random people on the street to put them on the spot. Becker asks funny, ridiculous and occasionally uncomfortable questions, forcing her subjects to answer on camera with nowhere to hide.
↧
Pennsylvania School Aide Gives Students Cookies That are Actually Pet Treats
Is it just me, or do these cookies taste a little more like ground up horse meat than usual?
According to Huffington Post, a school aide at New Hanover-Upper Frederick Elementary School in New Hanover Township is in deep shit after allegedly passing off pet treats as cookies to about 75 students last Thursday.![School Aide passes off pet treats as cookies]()
Gabriel Moore, a student at the school, said he ate three of the treats.
"She made it look like it was a joke that they were dog treats," Moore told a local television station. "And then she came around and said, 'No they are cookies. They are fine.'"
Boyerton Area School District Superintendent Richard Faidley said through a statement that unless a student had a specific food allergy, none of the kids who consumed the pet treats were harmed.
"The treats may have been misrepresented as cookies or crackers," Faidley said. "Our research on the product indicates that the treat ingredients would not be harmful to people."
Authorities are still trying to determine what motivated the aide to pass off the pet treats as cookies, but we'll assume it had something to do with her being a huge b**ch.
If we had to choose, however, we would take the school aide over these teachers: The 10 Creepiest and Most Awful Teachers of All Time
According to Huffington Post, a school aide at New Hanover-Upper Frederick Elementary School in New Hanover Township is in deep shit after allegedly passing off pet treats as cookies to about 75 students last Thursday.
Gabriel Moore, a student at the school, said he ate three of the treats.
"She made it look like it was a joke that they were dog treats," Moore told a local television station. "And then she came around and said, 'No they are cookies. They are fine.'"
Boyerton Area School District Superintendent Richard Faidley said through a statement that unless a student had a specific food allergy, none of the kids who consumed the pet treats were harmed.
"The treats may have been misrepresented as cookies or crackers," Faidley said. "Our research on the product indicates that the treat ingredients would not be harmful to people."
Authorities are still trying to determine what motivated the aide to pass off the pet treats as cookies, but we'll assume it had something to do with her being a huge b**ch.
If we had to choose, however, we would take the school aide over these teachers: The 10 Creepiest and Most Awful Teachers of All Time
↧
These Hilarious Celebrity Equations Totally Add Up
When you take certain celebrities and mash them up with other celebrities, you get a third celebrity. See if you can follow along with the math with these hilarious celebrity equations.
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
Via Vodka Vortex
Via Vodka Vortex
↧
↧
Florida Man Arrested for Sexting Naked Photos of Himself to Police
Apparently, even in Florida, sexting pictures of yourself wearing lingerie to a male officer is something that is frowned upon.
According to the Naples Daily News, Paul Arnold Kirleis was arrested on Sunday and charged with stalking and prohibition of certain acts in connection with obscene, lewd materials after doing just that.
![Florida man sexts cops nude photos]()
Marco Island police said Kirleis initially called them to report a suspicious vehicle in his neighborhood. One of their officers responded to him on his department-issued cell phone, but he began receiving texts and suggestive photos from Kirleis shortly thereafter.
The first photo was of "a man in a black thong and nothing else." That one was followed by a picture of a nude Kirleis allegedly bent over and looking back at the camera. The third picture again featured a man resembling Kirleis bent over and looking back at the camera, but this time, he was wearing lingerie.
Following the three photos, the officer received a text from Kirleis that simply read "Sooo."
Sooo, he was arrested.
Calling 911 in Florida is apparently the equivalent to calling a 1-900 number: Florida Woman Calls 911 for Sex
According to the Naples Daily News, Paul Arnold Kirleis was arrested on Sunday and charged with stalking and prohibition of certain acts in connection with obscene, lewd materials after doing just that.
Marco Island police said Kirleis initially called them to report a suspicious vehicle in his neighborhood. One of their officers responded to him on his department-issued cell phone, but he began receiving texts and suggestive photos from Kirleis shortly thereafter.
The first photo was of "a man in a black thong and nothing else." That one was followed by a picture of a nude Kirleis allegedly bent over and looking back at the camera. The third picture again featured a man resembling Kirleis bent over and looking back at the camera, but this time, he was wearing lingerie.
Following the three photos, the officer received a text from Kirleis that simply read "Sooo."
Sooo, he was arrested.
Calling 911 in Florida is apparently the equivalent to calling a 1-900 number: Florida Woman Calls 911 for Sex
↧
Next-level Sneakers You Should Own Now
↧
Chubby Kid Totally Oversells Injury and Gets Baseball For It
Often times, a young boy won't start crying after he hurts himself until he looks around to see if anybody else saw him. Sometimes he cries because he's really hurt, but most of the time it seems to be a combination of embarrassment and a need for attention.
But this young San Francisco Giants fan took it to another level during last night's Nationals-Giants game.
With the Nationals leading 2-0 in the top of the second inning, Tyler Colvin hit a hard ground ball down the first-base line that hopped up into the stands for a ground rule double. From there, this little porker stole the show:
We've watched the video a dozen times, mostly because watching fat kids fall down is hilarious. But we're willing to go as far as saying that the ball might not have even hit the kid.
Who knows? Maybe he really was hurt. Or maybe he realized that the woman in the row in front of him was laughing at him, and a high level of embarrassment set in. Either way, it looks like that leg didn't hurt too much as he stood up to wave to the crowd once he realized he was on TV.
Playing baseball probably isn't in this kid's future, but we'll bet he can throw a ball better than 50 Cent: 50 Cent Throws Out the Worst First Pitch in the History of First Pitches
But this young San Francisco Giants fan took it to another level during last night's Nationals-Giants game.
With the Nationals leading 2-0 in the top of the second inning, Tyler Colvin hit a hard ground ball down the first-base line that hopped up into the stands for a ground rule double. From there, this little porker stole the show:
We've watched the video a dozen times, mostly because watching fat kids fall down is hilarious. But we're willing to go as far as saying that the ball might not have even hit the kid.
Who knows? Maybe he really was hurt. Or maybe he realized that the woman in the row in front of him was laughing at him, and a high level of embarrassment set in. Either way, it looks like that leg didn't hurt too much as he stood up to wave to the crowd once he realized he was on TV.
Playing baseball probably isn't in this kid's future, but we'll bet he can throw a ball better than 50 Cent: 50 Cent Throws Out the Worst First Pitch in the History of First Pitches
↧
Tinder: The Good, The Bad and The Totally Insane
Dating can be really challenging. Luckily for single people, the Tinder app is here to help you meet all sorts of other single people looking to hook up. The only problem is, it seems a large number of those single people on Tinder might be slightly off their rockers. Here's a collection of the weirdest of the weirdos on Tinder.
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
↧
↧
Jessica Ashley is Playboy's Miss June...Swoon
↧
Absurd Yearbook Photos Vol. 3
↧
Chloe Patterson Makes Physical Education Sexy
↧
What Does It Take to Get 'No Results Found' on PornHub?
If any topic in the world needs to be discussed, it's what it takes to think of something so bizarre that not even Pornhub will serve up results. I'm assuming the average search on there usually falls under the sex category, but what if you try to search for the most non-sexual things you can come up with? I tried it and here's what happened.
Let's start with something that, while not sexual in nature, is probably ripe for an XXX parody. I searched "Harry Potter" and not surprisingly:
There were pages of results. I noticed the related searches on the side and realized I should get away from anything cinematic because they've got it covered. Everything from "Scooby Doo" to "The Simpsons."
Let's take it in another direction and try everyone's favorite savings destination: Walmart.
Not only are there results for Walmart, but also every other unsanitary place you'd never think about making whoopee, as the '70s would say.
Clearly it needs to be even less sexy than Walmart. Finally, a success:
Looks like the adult film world isn't catering to those who want to see their W-2s flash a little skin.
What about the absolute worst store to walk by at the mall?
I was shocked until I realized that most of those words on their own could incorporate some sort of sex, so I guess that makes sense. Don't get too cocky though (tee hee), Pornhub. I was pleasantly surprised to find no results for the world's most famous ogre:
I know there has to be plenty of user-made Shrek porn, but it looks like he and Donkey haven't crossed over to the big time yet.
This one is interesting because, while it did have results, there were only three.
Plus, as you can see, the third one has a 0% rating, which means it's probably just a lady eating a bowl of cereal then waving at the camera.
Somehow I got exactly three results the next search as well:
Now I'm sure if I went to the right site there would be pages of results for every animal, but it looks like no one is doing Toys 'R' Us porn parodies yet.
Let's see if the rest of the animal kingdom is as well-respected as the mighty giraffe:
So apparently there's a thing called sharking where a girl wearing a short skirt has her underwear pulled down, usually in Japan. That's weird, so let's try to take it in a completely different direction:
Now we just have a bunch of aquariums in the mix and not a single reference to Mark Cuban or his hit television show. Should we roll with that? Yes.
Once again there are numerous results. It has to be a weird feeling to know that you can do a Pornhub search of "clearance shark tank at Petsmart" and see your face as a result. Really makes you question some life choices.
Let's see if there are any truly awful people uploading videos:
Yep! Not only that, but why are people searching for terrorists on Pornhub? What possible scenarios are you wanting to unearth with that criteria? Does it keep going further?
Noooooo! I don't want to know why anyone is using that as a keyword in their erotic searches. I have one last shred of hope for the future of our species. Let's see what happens here:
THANK GOD! You can parody almost any movie, but this is definitely an exception. Let's lighten the mood a little and see if "The Walking Dead" has crossed over into the adult market:
Not a huge shocker there, but let's see if the guardian of the garden/the Batman villain is represented in porn:
No scarecrow results whatsoever. Hey porn, if you're looking for an untapped market, I found it for you. To thank me for my discovery, can you agree to continue to avoid this market:
Thank you!
↧
↧
Today's Funniest Photos
↧
The Absolute Worst Rooms For Rent
Finding a good place to live isn't easy. Especially if you're living in a major city like Los Angeles or New York. Most likely, you'll be overpaying for a pretty crappy living space that you'll be too embarrassed to let anyone see. Even if that's the case, you're still better off than any of the people who end up renting any of the rooms on The Worst Room - a Tumblr that is exactly what the title says. Some are real, some may not be, but they're all definitely the worst rentals you'll see. Take a look at some of these horrid rooms for rent and their descriptions so you can go home to your crappy apartment and be beyond thankful you have it.
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
For more terrible rentals to make you feel better about yourself, head over to The Worst Room.
Bushwick, Brooklyn. $3600.00
"A Hidden Gem"
"A vast space that is truly inspiring."
Los Angeles, California. $500.00
"take notice it is a small room"
Bedford Stuyvesant, Brooklyn. $600.00
"It will be like a total dorm room thing"
"the other roommate has to walk through your room to get to theirs"
(and if you just fold the futon in half, you have floorspace and a couch!)
Raymond, NH. $600.00
"finished basement"
(Perfect for single detectives working on unsolved murder cases)
Atlanta, Georgia. $595.00
"no frills bachelor pad"
"this place is totally weird. only a weirdo could appreciate it"
"tiny grungy"
Sydney, Australia. $350/week
(The "shit-in" kitchen)
"City living at its best"
Mission District, San Francisco. $480.00
"Luxury Closet Living"
"I thought I'd only be able to live in a closet for a few months and that was nearly two years ago."
"I kept shoes and clothes in baskets, which you can do too."
Upper West Side, Manhattan. $850.00
"mezzanine above the living room"
"it's about 3 feet tall so you can't stand up"
"you wont have a door but the loft is somehow private"
Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn. $750.00
Williamsburg, Brooklyn. $1200.00
For more terrible rentals to make you feel better about yourself, head over to The Worst Room.
↧
The U.S. Men's Soccer Team With Alexi Lalas Hair
↧
More Pages to Explore .....
