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10 Fantastic Water Slide Fails

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The 30 Greatest UFC Fighters of All Time

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The UFC has become one of the biggest sports in the world, growing astronomically from its first event in Denver, CO back in 1993. The sport has created legends and given a platform to some of the greatest athletes the world has ever seen, and is definitely at the pinnacle of performance right now. We reviewed the last 20 years and assembled the greatest fighters to ever grace the Octagon. These are the 30 greatest UFC fighters of all time.
brock lesnar, ufc greatest
30. Brock Lesnar

Who knows what would have happened with Lesnar's career if he had gone straight to MMA. He was the second fighter ever to win a UFC title in his fourth professional fight. He is the only man to earn consecutive wins over three reigning UFC champions and is tied with Randy Couture and Tim Sylvia for most consecutive heavyweight title defenses.


vitor belfort, ufc greatest
29. Vitor Belfort

Belfort is currently ranked #4 middleweight in the world and is a former light heavyweight champion. He has won eight of his last ten fights which highlight a career that includes such prominent opponents as Anderson Silva, Randy Couture, Chuck Liddell, Rich Franklin, Tito Ortiz, Wanderlei Silva and Dan Henderson.



jens pulver, ufc greatest
28. Jens Pulver

Pulver was the first UFC lightweight champion and holds the distinct honor of being one of only two fighters to defeat BJ Penn in the lightweight division. He also went on to coach "The Ultimate Fighter 5."





forrest griffin, ufc greatest
27. Forrest Griffin

Griffin was the winner of the first season of "The Ultimate Fighter" and went on to capture the light heavyweight championship. While he has fought in numerous high-profile battles, his fight against Stephan Bonnar in 2005 is considered by many to be the fight that broke the UFC into the mainstream in the U.S.



urijah faber, ufc greatest
26. Urijah Faber

The former featherweight champion who recently dropped down to the bantamweight (135 lbs.) category has had victories over Ivan Menjivar, Eddie Wineland and Jeff Curan. He is also the only man to defeat the current UFC bantamweight champion Dominick Cruz.




benson henderson, ufc greatest
25. Benson Henderson

Henderson has enjoyed victories over Clay Guida and Frankie Edgar on his way to the UFC lightweight championship. He then beat Edgar again to defend his title. He also held the WEC lightweight title from October 2009 to December 2010.




jose aldo, ufc greatest
24. Jose Aldo

The UFC featherweight champion has defended his title four times and is currently on a 14-fight win streak as he hasn't lost since 2005. Pound for pound he is considered one of the best current fighters in the sport today.




quinton jackson, rampage, ufc greatest
23. Quinton "Rampage" Jackson

Jackson is one of the most recognizable faces in UFC history and for a good reason. His fights against Wanderlei Silva and Forrest Griffin were named best fights of the year in 2004 and 2008. He also unified the UFC light heavyweight and Pride middleweight championships.




mirko filipovic, cro cop, ufc greatest
22. Mirko "Cro Cop" Filipovic

The 2006 Pride Open Weight Grand Prix champion is known as one of the greatest strikers in the history of the UFC. He has amassed 20 wins by KO or TKO including victories over Kazuyuki Fujita, Josh Barnett and Mark Coleman.




shogun rua, ufc greatest
21. Shogun Rua

Rua was the UFC light heavyweight champion and won the Pride Grand Prix tournament in 2005, where he defeated Rampage Jackson, Rogerio Noguieira and Ricardo Arona. He is also the only man to have back-to-back knockout wins over UFC Hall of Famers, when he KO'd Mark Coleman and Chuck Liddell.



wanderlei silva, ufc greatest
20. Wanderlei Silva

With his impressive unbeaten streak from 2000-2004, Silva dominated the heavyweight division with multiple Pride championships and two wins over Rampage Jackson. He is also a black belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu under Carlinhos Gracie.




rashad evans, ufc greatest
19. Rashad Evans

Evans won season two of "The Ultimate Fighter" and went on to be the third winner to capture a UFC title when he won the UFC light heavyweight championship. His bout against Chuck Liddell in 2008 ended with what most considered the knockout of the year.




bas rutten, ufc greatest
18. Bas Rutten

The former UFC heavyweight champion finished his career on a 22-fight unbeaten streak with 21 wins and 1 draw, including two different victories over Frank Shamrock.





dan severn, ufc greatest
17. Dan Severn

With a UFC record of 70-13-7, Severn is truly one of the legends of the sport. He won the UFC 5 tournament and was the last fighter to hold the UFC Superfight championship. Severn was inducted into the UFC Hall of Fame at UFC 52.




cain velasquez, ufc greatest
16. Cain Velasquez

Velasquez is the first Mexican-American to win any heavyweight championship in mixed martial arts. His biggest victory came at UFC 121 when he defeated the champ, Brock Lesnar, who had been completely unstoppable before the bout.




lyoto machida, ufc greatest
15. Lyoto Machida

The former UFC light heavyweight champ is known for his background in Shotokan karate. He has trained in it under his father since he was 3 years old. He single-handedly revived interest in karate after his victory over Rashad Evans in 2009.




14. Frankfrank mir, ufc greatest Mir

The most incredible part of Mir's career was the amazing comeback he made after a motorcycle accident in 2004. He tore the ligaments in his knee and shattered his femur only a couple of months after winning the UFC title from Tim Sylvia. Many thought he would never return to the Octagon, but after two and a half years of rehab he won a UFC interim title and has gone 6-4.



antonio rogerio nogueira, ufc greatest
13. Antonio Rogerio Nogueira

The Brazilian Jiu Jitsu champion was a force in the UFC along with his brother Rodrigo for years. His most notable wins have been against Tito Ortiz, Rashad Evans, Dan Henderson and Guy Mezger.





rich franklin, ufc greatest
12. Rich Franklin

Franklin held the UFC middleweight championship with two successful title defenses during his career. His resume includes fights with superstars such as Anderson Silva, Dan Henderson, Vitor Belfort and Forrest Griffin. He also won a Fight of the Night award for his impressive victory over Chuck Liddell at UFC 115.



ken shamrock, ufc greatest
11. Ken Shamrock

Known as "The World's Most Dangerous Man," Shamrock enjoyed an illustrious career in the UFC including becoming the first UFC Superfight Champion when he defeated Dan Severn at UFC 6. He also holds the record for the longest fight in UFC history, which lasted an incredible 36 minutes at UFC 5.



dan henderson, ufc greatest10. Dan Henderson

Henderson's resume is stronger than just about anyone in the history of the UFC. His only losses have come against the top names in the UFC while he holds victories over Wanderlei Silva, Vitor Belfort, Ryo Chonan, Antonio Nogueira, Fedor Emeilanenko, Yuki Kondo and numerous more. He is also the only fighter to ever knock out Renzo Gracie.



tito ortiz, ufc greatest
9. Tito Ortiz

One of the most decorated fighters in UFC history, Ortiz holds the record for most successful light heavyweight title defenses, most consecutive defenses, most light heavyweight championship fights, most light heavyweight championship fights won, and most light heavyweight championship rounds fought.



chuck liddell, ufc greatest
8. Chuck Liddell

Liddell dominated the light heavyweight division for over 11 years and was the first UFC fighter to ever appear on the cover of ESPN the Magazine. His career includes victories over Tito Ortiz, Randy Couture, Wanderlei Silva and Vitor Belfort, with a two-year reign as the light heavyweight champion.



royce gracie, ufc greatest
7. Royce Gracie

One of the trailblazers of MMA, Gracie was the first inductee into the Hall of Fame in 2003. If you need any proof of his skills and abilities, check out UFC I when Gracie defeated three different opponents in one night, a feat completely unheard of now in the sport.




bj penn, ufc greatest
6. BJ Penn

It's no surprise how dominant BJ Penn has been in the UFC seeing how he earned his BJJ black belt in three years, a task that usually takes more than 10 years to achieve. Penn is the only fighter to ever win both the lightweight and welterweight titles, as well.




matt hughes, ufc greatest
5. Matt Hughes

Considered the greatest welterweight fighter in the history of the UFC, Hughes was inducted into the Hall of Fame in 2010 and defended the welterweight title an amazing seven times. His fights with BJ Penn are some of the most exciting his weight class has ever seen.



randy couture, ufc greatest
4. Randy Couture

One of the most recognizable faces in the sport, Couture is the oldest fighter to ever win a title, as he defeated Tim Sylvia at age 43. The Hall of Famer is a three-time UFC Heavyweight Champion and also held the light heavyweight title twice. He also gets extra points for being one of "The Expendables."



jon jones, ufc greatest
3. Jon Jones

If he keeps fighting the way he has, in a few years Jones will be a strong argument for the best fighter of all time. The current light heavyweight champ has successfully defended his title five times already and is the youngest fighter in UFC history to hold a title. Interestingly enough, Jones has said that he learned many of his moves from watching YouTube videos.


georges st. pierre, ufc greatest
2. Georges St. Pierre

The two-time and current welterweight champion won the title from Matt Hughes at UFC 65 and boasts wins over BJ Penn, Jon Fitch, Josh Koscheck, and Thiago Alves, just to name a few. He has also won 11 straight fights, going unbeaten for the last four years.




anderson silva, ufc greatest
1. Anderson Silva

No one in the UFC has ever been more dominant than Anderson Silva. Originating from Brazil, "The Spider" holds the all-time record for most consecutive wins and the most title defenses in the UFC. There is not a more dominant striker in the sport than Silva.


Also Check Out: The 10 Nastiest MMA Knockouts of All Time

 

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15 Athletes Whose Names Sound Like Sex Acts

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Let's just be honest and admit that deep down we are all immature 12-year-old boys. As dignified and refined as we pretend to be, it's hard not to laugh when someone introduces themselves with a name that sounds like something that belongs in our underwear. Here are 15 athletes whose names sound like sex acts and what those so-called sex acts would entail.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, ron tugnutt
Ron Tugnutt
Who He Is:
A 17-year goalie in the NHL
Possible Sex Act: Some sort of discount happy ending request at a low-end massage parlor.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, chuck knoblauch
Chuck Knoblauch
Who He Is:
2nd baseman for a number of teams, including the New York Yankees and the Minnesota Twins
Possible Sex Act: Mouth love that takes place while one member of the party is doing a headstand.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, dick tiddy
Dick Tiddy
Who He Is:
Beloved 25 year Club Pro at the Bay Hill Golf Club
Possible Sex Act: C'mon, this one is pretty self explanatory. You can't even say that name without giggling. If you need help, the act would probably be similar to an already-existing one that rhymes with "kitty luck".

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, jumbo cummings
Jumbo Cummings
Who He Is:
Retired heavyweight boxing contender who fought Joe Frazier in the 1981
Possible Sex Act: Whatever it is, someone is probably leaving pregnant.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, rollie fingers
Rollie Fingers
Who He Is:
Hall of Fame Major League Baseball relief pitcher
Possible Sex Act: Hand love that simulates playing the opening riff from "Sweet Child of Mine" on Guitar Hero.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, dick butkus
Dick Butkus
Who He Is:
Hall of Fame linebacker from the Chicago Bears
Possible Sex Act: The act of kissing using only each of the participant's rear ends.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, albert pujols
Albert Pujols
Who He Is:
First baseman for the Anaheim Angels
Possible Sex Act: The act of connecting both parties genitals using a chain held together by bejeweled piercings.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, rusty kuntz
Rusty Kuntz
Who He Is:
Retired Major League Baseball player and current first base coach for the Kansas City Royals
Possible Sex Act: Intercourse where WD-40 is used as the personal lubricant.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, bj armstrong
BJ Armstrong
Who He Is:
Retired point guard for the Chicago Bulls
Possible Sex Act: Manual act of love using the bend of the arm on the opposite side of the elbow.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, dick trickle
Dick Trickle
Who He Is:
Retired American NASCAR driver
Possible Sex Act: Lovemaking act by one individual using a showerhead with stronger than normal water pressure.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, manuel pfister
Manuel Pfister
Who He Is:
World Luge Champion from Australia
Possible Sex Act: Probably what you see in his photo, just replace the sled with a fist.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names,  bob griese
Bob Griese
Who He Is:
Retired Quarterback for the Miami Dolphins
Possible Sex Act: Mouth love given and received while each partner eats a pepperoni P'zone from Pizza Hut.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names,  phyllis mangina
Phyllis Mangina
Who She Is:
Former basketball player and coach for Seton Hall
Possible Sex Act: Furious dry humping that requires both participants to wear a finely pressed pant suit.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, misty hyman
Misty Hyman
Who She Is:
American gold medal winning swimmer from the 2000 Summer Olympics
Possible Sex Act: Lovemaking involving one person and a completely filled Windex bottle.

athletes with funny names, athletes with sexual names, dean windass
Dean Windass
Who He Is:
English Premier League Soccer player
Possible Sex Act: Spanking the buttocks of your partner while it hangs out the window of a fast moving car.

 

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Today's Funniest Photos 5-29-13

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If Celebrities Were Dictators

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Cheer Up with Sexy Photos of 'The Hills' Star Lauren Conrad

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Tequila Review: Casa Noble

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We at Mandatory are huge fans of tequila. Not the cheap, harsh tequila that burns your throat on the way down and is best taken in one swift shot or masked by an alarming amount of the most sugary margarita mix you can find. We enjoy the good stuff. The stuff you can drink straight, on the rocks, or mixed in a sophisticated cocktail. The kind that goes down a little smoother and is so delicious that just one glass really isn't an option.

This is why we were all about sampling the different expressions of tequila that Casa Noble has to offer. Casa Noble is one of only three organic tequilas made in the world and boasts a number of awards. The fermentation process is 100% natural and is followed by triple distillation. Each expression has its own distinct flavor so, depending what you're in the mood for, they've got you covered. Plus, you know a tequila is good if Rock 'n' Roll legend Carlos Santana is a part of the team.


Casa Noble Crystal
Any good home bar should have a Silver/Blanco tequila. Casa Noble's Crystal, which earns its name by appropriately looking the part, would be a welcome addition to any basic bar. While it may be the least appealing of the three expressions in this review, it's affordability makes it an excellent stepping stone on your journey from blacked-out frat boy to full-fledged tequila connoisseur. With summer quickly approaching, do yourself a favor and pour a little bit of this sweet and smoky tequila with hints of cinnamon, citrus, white pepper, and cherry over some ice to enjoy as soon as possible. $35





Casa Noble Reposado
Aged in French Oak barrels for nearly a year (364 days, to be exact), Casa Noble's Reposado is the perfect mixture of smooth and spicy. The little kick at the end makes this one of our favorites because there's enough age on this tequila to make it a sipping tequila, but it doesn't suffer from being too smooth (not that there's anything wrong with that.) But for those times when you want to be reminded that you're a man drinking a man's tequila, then opt for the Reposado instead of the ultra-smooth Anejo. $45







Casa Noble Anejo
This expression is an overall favorite of not only the three included in this review, but of tequilas entirely. It's extra aged in French White Oak barrels for two years and is produced in limited quantities. With notes of chocolate, coffee bean, and rich oak complimenting the sweet agave, citrus, herbs, and spices, you'll pleasantly discover during the first sip why this high quality tequila is an award-winner. $50





Check out Casa Noble.com for more information, including cocktail suggestions and recipes.

 

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10 Bizarre On-Set Injuries of Famous Movie Stars

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Fuck You, Tapas

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Tapas is a scam. Every time I go out to a restaurant that specializes in Tapas (overpriced small plates for the uninitiated), I end up leaving broke and starving. To better illustrate this point, we put the average price of a regular non-tapas meal price next to a standard Tapas meal with it's giant pile of tiny plates.
tapas, fuck you, tapas, tapas sucks, tapas is overpriced

I know Tapas has been around forever, but it seems like every restaurant in the universe figured out that if they sell minuscule plates of regular food, but with a sprig of micro greens or a dusting of wasabi powder, then they can charge nearly the same as a real meal with a real amount of food. Fuck you, Tapas.

 

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The Golden Girls On The Appetite for Destruction Album Cover Just Because

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golden girls, appetite for destruction, golden girls and appetite for destruction, guns n roses

Everyone in the world agrees that Appetite for Destruction is the most important piece of music ever released. The Golden Girls played a similar role in the world of sitcom television. These are two trailblazing pieces of art that will live on forever and now they can live on forever together. See what it looks like when Dorothy, Blanche, Rose and Sophia hop on the cross that Axl, Slash, Duff, Steven and Izzy first made famous in 1987. For the record, I would buy this album in an instant.

 

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The Funniest GIFs of the Week - May 30, 2013

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Today's Funniest Photos 5-30-13

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Man Installs Motion Sensor Shower To Stop People From Peeing In His Alley

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Business Owner Gets Revenge on Public Urinators

Look, we've all been there before. There is nothing worse than having to go to the bathroom really bad and being stuck far away from any functioning toilet. That doesn't mean you have the right to piss all over somebody else's property.

One enterprising individual took it upon himself to keep strangers from marking their territory on his territory. As you can see, as each unsuspecting urinator steps into the alley corner, they think they've found the perfect location to take a leak. Then, just as they settle in -- SPLASH -- a flood of water showers down on top of them. Now they need a bathroom with a urinal and a hand dryer.

More from Mandatory: The Funniest Photos You Will See Today

 

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Anna Cariad is a Welsh Wonder

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Nathan Fielder's Social Media Prank That Ruined Relationships

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If you're not familiar with Nathan Fielder and his Comedy Central show "Nathan for You," then you are seriously missing out on some of the best pranks in recent memory. We recently featured it on The Funniest Shows You Might Have Missed and after you see his latest prank you'll understand why. Fielder took to Twitter and offered this challenge to his followers:
nathan fielder, nathan for you, text prank
A shocking amount of men and women decided it would be worth possibly throwing away their relationships to participate. It was terrible for them but absolutely hilarious to us. This is one time that I wish the text conversations were photoshopped. If this is any indication of what the next season of "Nathan for You" will be like, we are in for some fantastic television. You can follow Fielder on Twitter and check out some of the other Social Media pranks he's pulled, but for now take a look at the responses Fielder received:
nathan fielder, nathan for you, text prank
nathan fielder, nathan for you, text pranknathan fielder, nathan for you, text pranknathan fielder, nathan for you, text pranknathan fielder, nathan for you, text pranknathan fielder, nathan for you, text pranknathan fielder, nathan for you, text pranknathan fielder, nathan for you, text pranknathan fielder, nathan for you, text pranknathan fielder, nathan for you, text pranknathan fielder, nathan for you, text prank
nathan fielder, nathan for you, text prank
nathan fielder, nathan for you, text prank

 

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The Weirdest Bootleg Merchandise from 'The Simpsons'

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The 30 Best "Steve Jobs, Bob Hope, and Johnny Cash" Jokes on the Internet

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If you've ever stumbled upon a Twitter parody account you've probably seen this old joke posted about a million times:

Ten years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope, and Johnny Cash. Now we have no jobs, no hope, and no cash.

Profound and moving, I know. It has since taken on a life of its own and mocking the overdone joke has become a joke format or a meme in itself. There is even a fake parody account, KattWillFerrell,that does nothing but post different variations of the same joke much to the disapproval of those following who aren't in on the joke. Here are 30 of the best variations of the not-so classic joke:

 

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This Week's 20 Funniest Tweets

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Today's Funniest Photos 5-31-13

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Playboy's Miss May 2011 Sasha Bonilova Knows How to Fill Out a Shirt

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