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There's not a man among us who didn't have at least one or two sports figurines growing up. Sure, they weren't always the most detailed or accurate, but we got the point. However, looking back, a lot of our childhood heroes had toys, statues and bobbleheads modeled after them that could just barely qualify as being in their likeness. Here is a list of some of the worst offenders.
Roy Halladay, 2012 (MLB.com)
Let's start with a collectible that drew a lot of negative attention from fans when it first showed up on MLB's website. Along with Halladay's uncharacteristically happy face, he appears to be playing some sort of variation of the game where pitchers hold the baseball at all times and throw their gloves at the batter instead. Who knows, maybe it'll catch on.
(Editor's note: After it was discovered, MLB.com rectified the error)
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Gary Payton, 1996 (Starting Lineup)
OK, to be fair, if you search for and order the 1996 Gary Payton Starting Lineup figure from Amazon, you will get an actual Gary Payton figure and not this obvious mistake. But this is the photo they have up, and people aren't too happy when they order it expecting to receive the flawed product. However, that doesn't mean it's any less hilarious to us.
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Jason Kidd, 1996 (Starting Lineup)
Rest assured, if you are even remotely anything but white, Starting Lineup will capitalize on it...
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Derek Jeter, 1996 (Starting Lineup)
...unless you are Derek Jeter. Then you become a white Irish man.
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Alex Ovechkin, 2012 (NHL.com)
This one is actually pretty good. And by pretty good, we mean that if you have a buddy who is a huge Alex Ovechkin fan and you like it when someone spits in your face, you should buy it for him as a gift.
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Dennis Rodman, 1999 (Street Players)
This one is too close to pick a favorite. On the one hand, who wouldn't want an awful-looking, borderline Dennis Rodman Barbie doll that you can accessorize? But on the other hand, you'd have to be as sexually confused as Dennis Rodman to buy the blushing bride on the right.
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One more shot of the Dennis Rodman Wedding Day doll, just for good measure.
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Brett Favre, 1998 (Headliners)
Is it possible to read sarcasm? Let's give it a shot. Wow, for a product that focuses primarily on faces, they sure sculpted this one down to the finest detail.
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Dale Earnhardt, Sr., 2004 (Sportsman Collection)
This one is pretty close when it comes to his likeness. We just wanted to point out how NASCAR was just shamelessly exploiting their fanbase. But just for future reference, hunter Dale Earnhardt, if you are going to go through all the trouble of even buying a camo backpack, spring for the camo hat as well.
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Tiger Woods
Judging from his body language, Tiger just sank a putt, and he is pumped. A lot of detail sure went into this statue. Too bad the designers didn't think his face needed to reflect that.
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Robert Griffin III, 2012 (McFarlane Toys NFL Series 31)
In all honesty, this figurine looks pretty damn good. But of course, it is getting a lot of complaints from die-hard fans. While the attention to detail here appears to be quite stellar, Robert Griffin has always worn a white glove as well as a pure white arm sleeve. And honestly, they probably would have gotten away with it if that glove pattern weren't so ridiculously ugly.
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Charles Barkley, 1996 (Starting Lineup)
Who wouldn't want a guy on his basketball team with arms longer than his legs with an inability to jump straight up?
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Charles Barkley, 1997 (Starting Lineup)
Another one for Chuck. We're not saying he looks like a Green Lantern villain, we're just not NOT saying it. And what happened to his torso?
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Mark McGwire, 1988 (Starting Lineup)
Now, we'll admit that we don't know everything about human anatomy, but we are pretty sure that a person's wingspan, and not just their right arm by itself, should be about the same as how tall they are.
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Ronaldo (Brazil), 2009
We get it, his teeth are a little weird, and he's not as attractive as the other Ronaldo. But come on, cut the poor guy a little slack.
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Mike Tyson
What can we say about this doll other than it makes the previous Ronaldo bobblehead look like Michelangelo's David. Seriously, this may be the ugliest thing we've ever seen. Jokes aren't even really necessary if you just look at the picture for about 10 straight seconds.
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Steve Nash, 2007 (MacFarlane NBA Series 5)
Where to even start with this one? Besides looking nothing like Steve Nash (more like Justin Long perhaps?), it's just a repainted version of his Dallas Mavericks figure that also looks nothing like him (next slide).
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See, told ya.
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Ken Griffey, Jr.
We don't want to say this one is borderline racist.
...That is all.
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Cal Ripken, Jr., 2007 (giveaway)
Sorry, we don't know why we put this one. It's a perfectly accurate Bruce Willis bobblehead.
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Lou Williams, 2012 (giveaway)
This meme really says it best. And just as an added bonus, here is a cool Lou Williams story.
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Zinedine Zidane (Real Madrid)
We don't think a man's facial/head features could be exaggerated any more than this.
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Shaquille O'Neal, 1998 (Starting Lineup)
Doubles as "Generic Bald African-American Athlete" quite well.
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Roger Bossard, 2011
Don't get us wrong, it's neat that the Chicago White Sox had a Roger Bossard bobblehead day to honor the team's official head groundskeeper since 1983. But...come on. Where do you even put something like this once you have it?
(Editor's note: In 2012 the White Sox also had a Beer Vendor Bobblehead giveaway)
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25 of 25Next: The Worst Movie Action Figures of All Time
Michael Vick
He was the most hated athlete in the NFL at one point, and for good reason. And this custom made figure combining Vick with McFarlane Toys' Military Series 4 Dog Trainer line -- actually, this is just in very, very poor taste.