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Twitter1 of 20Another week, another batch of inappropriately hilarious tweets compiled just for you. Be sure to follow these guys and gals, and check back here every week for more jokes you can tell your friends and pretend you came up with them yourself. They'll think you're hilarious, but inside you'll be cold and dead.
Follow @robfee on Twitter.
The lone plane crash survivor crawls ashore a deserted island and takes shelter under a tree. Carved in bark: Hot Singles In Your Area
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Twitter2 of 20Good pickup line: "I notice you're not fat..."
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Twitter3 of 20raisin hell and raisin' hell are incredibly different
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Twitter4 of 20How much wu would a wutang tang if a wutang could tang wu?
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Twitter5 of 20sext: You say that the human body has 206 bones. I say let's make it 207.
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Clik here to view.Twitter6 of 20What if robots dance normal and we've just looked like assholes this whole time
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Clik here to view.Twitter7 of 20If I were a fruit I'd be a cantaloupe because I'm a big piece of shit
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Clik here to view.Twitter8 of 20Was having a bad day then realized Chelsea Clinton's porn star names is "Socks Pennsylvania"
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Clik here to view.Twitter9 of 20Hello, k€sha? are you there? kes#a? kesh@, your fa+h3r and i are very worried about you. please call. love mom.
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Clik here to view.Twitter10 of 20TIP: A common grammatical mistake is confusing "there" and "thinking strangers want your grammatical advice."
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Clik here to view.Twitter11 of 20After sex, the penis turns into an Auntie Anne's pretzel to share.
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Clik here to view.Twitter12 of 20I bet Anne Hathaway's parents still play the "quiet game" with her.
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Clik here to view.Twitter13 of 20Girls who quote Marilyn Monroe poke holes in condoms.
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Clik here to view.Twitter14 of 20it was the busta rhymes, it was the wursta rhymes
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Clik here to view.Twitter15 of 207 Tips For Getting Back Down To Your Birth Weight
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Clik here to view.Twitter16 of 20Bleeding out after chest bumping the mirror. I just saw a bro and I didn't think, ok?
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Clik here to view.Twitter17 of 20Nothing gets me motivated for 10-15 seconds like a good inspirational quote.
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Clik here to view.Twitter18 of 20Don't be so quick to judge! That "loser" at Taco Bell may know dozens of bird calls.
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Clik here to view.Twitter19 of 20Rap stars make so many promises in their lyrics about how great their sex will be I might just give it a try.
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Clik here to view.Twitter20 of 20Next: Even More Hilarious TweetsI can't believe "strap on" backwards is "no parts." That's literally the most ironic thing in the world.
