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12 Of The Most Bizarre Things Baggage Checkers Found In Luggage

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If you're anything like me, you usually check your suitcase a dozen times to make sure there's nothing that would alert TSA or cause any embarrassment for you. After reading what TSA workers have found in bags through the years, it appears that people like us are not in the majority. If you thought your last pat down was humiliating, you'll feel much better after reading these horrifying experiences:

1. BellaBunny
I worked security at an airport and apart from assorted dildos and vibrators, I've opened bags and found:
  • A snake in a coke bottle full of embalming fluid
  • A rubber chicken
  • A human skull
  • Live cockroaches
  • Hundreds of condoms
  • And of course, a bag of poop

2. Soryaan
Family with a girl and a boy - he was 18/19 - just finished his military service. Goes through detector - beeping - they ask if he forgot something in his pants - he is getting fidgety - but pulls out two bullets in the end - huge problem - now they have to call the police and explosives team. Dad is pissed about boy but pretty calm so far. Police comes, checks bullets and now the real fun begins - turns out the bulls are from the army and were apparently and unofficial souvenir - problem is that this is a pretty serious crime here since its military hardware. Dad freaks out starts to hit son - police has to separate them - arrests both - mum and daughter are crying - all stay put and we have to de-embark them.

3. Indy_Pendant
Three thousand dollars in small, unmarked bills.

4. Tok91
I go to a catholic college and they don't hand out any condoms at my school. I visited a friend at a school, which was very liberal with their condom handouts. I was able to get a hold of approximately 250, all gold and in a giant garbage bag. Passing through NYC the bag checker at the train station just looked at me with disgust and shook his head.

5. TheNeverThrowAway
I work at an airport and some weirdo had taped a fork to a dildo. The group of friends proceeded to laugh, I have always assumed it must have been some weird fetish they were in to.

6. Ryanrows
I was working as an usher for an event that did not require tickets, let alone a bag check. Nonetheless, a woman insists that she show someone her bag "to be safe." Inside: assorted regular purse items, a box of magnum condoms, anywhere between $2500-$5000 cash, a razor, and a burrito.

I had to confiscate the burrito.

7. Notlandshark
While working at the airport, I checked a bag that contained an entire goat, including the head. In pieces. Bloody, hairy pieces taped up in plastic bags.

8. Captain_DeWolfe
I used to work on the border in Australia, and some of the shit people think they can bring into a country... I started keeping a list of some of the weirder shit, thought about writing a book one day. Here's a few, and let me tell you, bags are just the start:
  • Contraband parrots (live) hidden inside a taxidermist bear
  • Smoked monkey meat
  • Snakes (live) wrapped around the coils of old VHS tapes.
  • Reptiles (live and dead) declared as a didgeridoo.
  • Iguana hidden inside a prosthetic leg
  • Frogs (live) concealed in film canisters
  • Gift-wrapped hawk
  • Pigeons taped to ankles and hidden under pants
  • Vest of exotic bird eggs, worn

9. HavenKane
I worked reservations for an airline for a while. Had a lady call to make sure it was okay to bring a frozen turkey as her carry on. Apparently she didn't trust her daughter-in-law to buy the right kind for Thanksgiving. We couldn't find any reason that she couldn't, but I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when she went through security.

10. CustomsCartman
A full animal spine, not professionally butchered, fresh with bits of flesh attached. Being brought in for voodoo/African witchcraft type ceremony. It took four people to restrain the woman when we took it. She reacted like we were holding a knife to her child's throat or something.

11. Dthangel
Friend of mine told me about 2 very odd ones. He was a TSA supervisor at an international airport. While he had a ton of stories, the 2 that got me were.
  1. Preserved human head. I was a professor from a college personally transporting it. Apparently it was rather important and was on loan. He forgot to file the paperwork, and just stuck it in his bag and sent it throw security. Missed his flight while they sorted it out.
  2. A custom lined briefcase with a couple hand made cattle prods, electrified "inserts" and restraint gear. Could obviously tell it was very high end stuff. It was a diplomat from another country, so they had to just ensure that the prods were not charged, and let him through with it.
12. Highschoolblows
Oatmeal. Not like dry oatmeal either, it was an entire suitcase filled with cooked oatmeal. They lined the inside with plastic so that it wouldn't leak.

 

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