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German Woman Robs Pharmacy by Spraying Breast Milk

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Here's a story that could qualify as both the grossest and hottest robbery of the year. I mean, there had to be an 18-year-old employee stocking cough syrup and pantyhose somewhere in the store who thought this was the greatest thing he had ever seen.
German woman robs store by spraying her breast milk
According to UPI, a "robust" German woman robbed a pharmacy in Darmstadt Monday afternoon by exposing her boobs and spraying employees with her breast milk.

Employees told police the woman acted as if she was interested in purchasing a breast pump worth $25 and handed the cashier a bill worth approximately $255. She then whipped out a nipple and "used her fingers to make it squirt milk at a pharmacist."

Despite soaking the first pharmacist, the woman still had enough milk left in the tank to move on to a second cash register and do the same thing. At the end of the night, that register was $127 short. Police said the woman's spray sesh was "likely a distraction for the woman's theft."

Um, no shit.

Call us crazy, but if the woman handed over a note worth $255 and only made off with $127, this would probably also qualify as the dumbest robbery of all time.

Now that you're in the mood: Woman Lifts Dress at Work and Fills Milk Carton With Breast Milk

 

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