Life is a trip. These 10 tall tales will make you infinitely gracious for your trials and travails, for it could always be worse. We'll start with the good and then get to the ugly.
"GOOD" Dumb Luck
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Metal Rod Strikes Construction Worker's Skull, Feels No Pain ... Like a Boss
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Eduardo Leite was working at a Rio de Janeiro construction site in August 2012 when he felt something strike his brain. He reached up and felt a six-foot iron rod sticking out of his face. It had fallen from five stories and punctured his skull.
The 24-year-old Brazilian was fully conscious when he went to the hospital. "He was holding it and his face was covered in blood. His look was as if nothing had happened. When he arrived he told the doctors he wasn't feeling anything, no pain, nothing," his wife said. After a five-hour surgery and a dose of baby Aspirin, Leite was all right.
He would've lost an eye or become paralyzed if it had entered an inch or two in either direction. It hit a "non-eloquent area" of the brain, a place that serves no major function. Let's hope Mr. Leite doesn't become an asshole like Phineas Gage.
Adopted Son Finds Birth Mother He Already Knew
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A story that will give even sternest red-blooded American hard-ass the feels, a 22-year-old man discovered his lost birth mother was his coworker.
Steve Flaig worked as a delivery driver at Lowe's in Grand Rapids, Mich. Since he was 18, he was on a quest to find his mom. He went to the agency that handled his adoption and got a name, but for years he had no luck because he was spelling it wrong. The agency gave him the correct spelling and within days, his life would irreversibly change.
His mother, Christine Tallady, worked as a cashier.
"Passing each other, it was just, 'Hey,'" Tallady said. At the time Steve didn't know how to handle it so the agency phoned Tallady to let her know. They met at a restaurant the very next day. "He got out of his seat, and we just hugged and hugged and hugged and cried and cried."
Steve's roommate told "Today" that he was completely different afterwards. "He's infinitely happier. He constantly has a smile on his face and seems a lot more excited than he has been in a long time."
Astoundingly, Flaig and Tallady went to the same high school, the same church, and lived very close to each other. And now I need to clean off my keyboard because it's soaked in man-tears.
Man Saves Falling Baby, Twice
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In Detroit during the 1930s, a series of freak occurrences happened. Joseph Figlock was a humble street sweeper minding his own business when he looked up and saw a baby falling from the sky. He broke the young'un's fall and the baby survived.
In 1938, one year later, the same baby fell from the same fourth-floor window. Figlock was again in the right place at the right time, and saved the two-year-old yet again. And the Mother of the Year award goes to...
Seth MacFarlane Misses Flight on 9/11
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Seth MacFarlane partied too hard on September 10, 2001. The next morning he was scheduled for American Airlines Flight 11, the plane that crashed into the North Tower of the World Trade Center.
Hungover and late, he missed his flight by 15 minutes. At 8:46 a.m., it careened into the building and the world changed forever.
Massachusetts Man Wins Same Lottery, Twice
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In October 2014, a Norwood, Mass. man wrote down his lucky numbers. Forgetting that he already owned a season pass for the same numbers, a representative called him and informed him he technically won twice.
Kenneth Stokes won $546,000. The odds of someone winning twice were 985,517 to one. He now receives a cool $25,000 a year for 20 years.
"BAD" DUMB LUCK
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The Man Present in Both Hiroshima and Nagasaki
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On August 6, 1945, Tsutomu Yamaguchi was in Hiroshima on business. He was done for the day and was about to leave the city when he saw a plane by high overhead. He then saw a tiny silvery package fall slowly from the sky. He instinctively took cover.
Yamaguchi was blown away and lost consciousness. When he awoke, the dust blanketing the city put it in an eerie darkness. His ear drums ruptured, his eyes went temporarily blind, and searing burns covered his body. He was 1.5 miles from ground zero.
Panicking, Yamaguchi ran to a train that was still in order. He fled to his hometown, Nagasaki. In typical Japanese fashion-while still in bandages-he went back to work on August 9. That day, "Fat Man" hit the city. He was again within 1.5 miles of blast radius.
In 2009, the Japanese government recognized him as the only person to survive both. Yamaguchi lived a ripe old life until he died in 2010 at 93.
Canadian Gets Mauled by Bear, then Shot by Son-in-Law
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Winners of Canada's annual Best Name in the Universe Award Wilf Lloyd and Skeet Podrasky were hunting last October when a massive grizzly appeared in the distance. It attacked Lloyd and mauled him. Podrasky drew his gun and began firing. The first shot missed the bear and struck Lloyd, injuring him seriously.
The bear was made good, however, and conservation officers came to the scene. While the two men deserve to be on his list for those names alone, Lloyd takes the cake for the unluckiest.
Park Ranger Survives Seven Lightning Strikes
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Between 1942 and 1977, Roy Sullivan worked as a park ranger in Virginia's Shenandoah National Park. He holds the Guinness World Record for being struck seven times by lightning. They've dubbed him the "Human Lightning Rod" and the "Human Lightning Conductor."
He survived blasts to the head, which in nearly every instance burnt his hair completely off. One time he was hit while a bear simultaneously tried to eat the trout on the end of his fishing line. He promptly swatted it with a tree branch. (He later claimed it was the 22nd time he's had to hit bears with sticks.) Multiple lightning bolts couldn't kill him, but he committed suicide at 71 because a chick wouldn't love him back.
The World's Luckiest Unluckiest Man
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Croatian Frano Selak has lived the life of John McLane. He has had numerous brushes with death, lending him the nickname the "world's luckiest unluckiest man." Here are some of his follies.
o. 1962: Survived a train crash in a river that drowned 17.
o. 1963: Survived a plane crash by landing in a haystack-19 dead
o. 1966: Survived a bus crash that left four dead
o. 1970: Escaped a fiery car which ignited the fuel tank, blowing it to smithereens
o. 1977: A malfunctioning fuel pump in his car caught fire and flames singed off his hair
o. 1995: Hit by a bus in Zagreb, sustaining minor injuries
o. 1996: Just missed a head-on collision by swerving into a guard rail; he was ejected by the car because he wasn't wearing a seatbelt and his vehicle plummeted 300 feet into a ravine
In 2003, he won the lottery for $1,110,000.
Woman Surprises Boyfriend With Wedding Ceremony
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A picture is worth a thousand words.
"GOOD" Dumb Luck
Metal Rod Strikes Construction Worker's Skull, Feels No Pain ... Like a Boss
Eduardo Leite was working at a Rio de Janeiro construction site in August 2012 when he felt something strike his brain. He reached up and felt a six-foot iron rod sticking out of his face. It had fallen from five stories and punctured his skull.
The 24-year-old Brazilian was fully conscious when he went to the hospital. "He was holding it and his face was covered in blood. His look was as if nothing had happened. When he arrived he told the doctors he wasn't feeling anything, no pain, nothing," his wife said. After a five-hour surgery and a dose of baby Aspirin, Leite was all right.
He would've lost an eye or become paralyzed if it had entered an inch or two in either direction. It hit a "non-eloquent area" of the brain, a place that serves no major function. Let's hope Mr. Leite doesn't become an asshole like Phineas Gage.
Adopted Son Finds Birth Mother He Already Knew
A story that will give even sternest red-blooded American hard-ass the feels, a 22-year-old man discovered his lost birth mother was his coworker.
Steve Flaig worked as a delivery driver at Lowe's in Grand Rapids, Mich. Since he was 18, he was on a quest to find his mom. He went to the agency that handled his adoption and got a name, but for years he had no luck because he was spelling it wrong. The agency gave him the correct spelling and within days, his life would irreversibly change.
His mother, Christine Tallady, worked as a cashier.
"Passing each other, it was just, 'Hey,'" Tallady said. At the time Steve didn't know how to handle it so the agency phoned Tallady to let her know. They met at a restaurant the very next day. "He got out of his seat, and we just hugged and hugged and hugged and cried and cried."
Steve's roommate told "Today" that he was completely different afterwards. "He's infinitely happier. He constantly has a smile on his face and seems a lot more excited than he has been in a long time."
Astoundingly, Flaig and Tallady went to the same high school, the same church, and lived very close to each other. And now I need to clean off my keyboard because it's soaked in man-tears.
Man Saves Falling Baby, Twice
In Detroit during the 1930s, a series of freak occurrences happened. Joseph Figlock was a humble street sweeper minding his own business when he looked up and saw a baby falling from the sky. He broke the young'un's fall and the baby survived.
In 1938, one year later, the same baby fell from the same fourth-floor window. Figlock was again in the right place at the right time, and saved the two-year-old yet again. And the Mother of the Year award goes to...
Seth MacFarlane Misses Flight on 9/11
Seth MacFarlane partied too hard on September 10, 2001. The next morning he was scheduled for American Airlines Flight 11, the plane that crashed into the North Tower of the World Trade Center.
Hungover and late, he missed his flight by 15 minutes. At 8:46 a.m., it careened into the building and the world changed forever.
Massachusetts Man Wins Same Lottery, Twice
In October 2014, a Norwood, Mass. man wrote down his lucky numbers. Forgetting that he already owned a season pass for the same numbers, a representative called him and informed him he technically won twice.
Kenneth Stokes won $546,000. The odds of someone winning twice were 985,517 to one. He now receives a cool $25,000 a year for 20 years.
"BAD" DUMB LUCK
The Man Present in Both Hiroshima and Nagasaki
On August 6, 1945, Tsutomu Yamaguchi was in Hiroshima on business. He was done for the day and was about to leave the city when he saw a plane by high overhead. He then saw a tiny silvery package fall slowly from the sky. He instinctively took cover.
Yamaguchi was blown away and lost consciousness. When he awoke, the dust blanketing the city put it in an eerie darkness. His ear drums ruptured, his eyes went temporarily blind, and searing burns covered his body. He was 1.5 miles from ground zero.
Panicking, Yamaguchi ran to a train that was still in order. He fled to his hometown, Nagasaki. In typical Japanese fashion-while still in bandages-he went back to work on August 9. That day, "Fat Man" hit the city. He was again within 1.5 miles of blast radius.
In 2009, the Japanese government recognized him as the only person to survive both. Yamaguchi lived a ripe old life until he died in 2010 at 93.
Canadian Gets Mauled by Bear, then Shot by Son-in-Law
Winners of Canada's annual Best Name in the Universe Award Wilf Lloyd and Skeet Podrasky were hunting last October when a massive grizzly appeared in the distance. It attacked Lloyd and mauled him. Podrasky drew his gun and began firing. The first shot missed the bear and struck Lloyd, injuring him seriously.
The bear was made good, however, and conservation officers came to the scene. While the two men deserve to be on his list for those names alone, Lloyd takes the cake for the unluckiest.
Park Ranger Survives Seven Lightning Strikes
Between 1942 and 1977, Roy Sullivan worked as a park ranger in Virginia's Shenandoah National Park. He holds the Guinness World Record for being struck seven times by lightning. They've dubbed him the "Human Lightning Rod" and the "Human Lightning Conductor."
He survived blasts to the head, which in nearly every instance burnt his hair completely off. One time he was hit while a bear simultaneously tried to eat the trout on the end of his fishing line. He promptly swatted it with a tree branch. (He later claimed it was the 22nd time he's had to hit bears with sticks.) Multiple lightning bolts couldn't kill him, but he committed suicide at 71 because a chick wouldn't love him back.
The World's Luckiest Unluckiest Man
Croatian Frano Selak has lived the life of John McLane. He has had numerous brushes with death, lending him the nickname the "world's luckiest unluckiest man." Here are some of his follies.
o. 1962: Survived a train crash in a river that drowned 17.
o. 1963: Survived a plane crash by landing in a haystack-19 dead
o. 1966: Survived a bus crash that left four dead
o. 1970: Escaped a fiery car which ignited the fuel tank, blowing it to smithereens
o. 1977: A malfunctioning fuel pump in his car caught fire and flames singed off his hair
o. 1995: Hit by a bus in Zagreb, sustaining minor injuries
o. 1996: Just missed a head-on collision by swerving into a guard rail; he was ejected by the car because he wasn't wearing a seatbelt and his vehicle plummeted 300 feet into a ravine
In 2003, he won the lottery for $1,110,000.
Woman Surprises Boyfriend With Wedding Ceremony
A picture is worth a thousand words.