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Despite being largely useless, "As Seen on TV" products often sell pretty well, perhaps because they promise a quick fix to problems we're too lazy to tackle head on, like reducing our muffin top or locating a bathroom. Alternatively, we could just be a dumb species. We're not here to judge... but we are here to make you laugh, so we found 20 of the silliest, stupidest, nonsensical infomercial products for your personal enjoyment.
The weight of one massive jug on top of the other has been plaguing big-breasted side sleepers for ages. Or so the makers of this item claim.
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Contain your lunch and expose your OCD.
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Protect yourself from deadly farts with "the same fabric used by the military to protect against chemical weapons."
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A bedside gun rack so you can shoot an intruder without hesitating long enough to notice it's just your girlfriend.
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If your sheets aren't tight enough to suffocate you, achieve asphyxiation with this hand-replacing tool.
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Leave a little bit of your ball sweat every place you visit with this traveling torture chamber.
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This product for the prostate challenged was recently included in a Father's Day Gift Guide ... written by the worst son ever.
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Gangnam Style Singing Toothbrush
Hear this maddening tune two times a day for two minutes straight and try not to kill yourself. It's like Fear Factor.
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Do you really want to live past the point when you can't wipe your own ass? Contemplate this before buying.
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That motorboating son of a bitch!
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A lazy Suzan for your fat ass that's guaranteed to make it even fatter.
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This boob apron has the potential to eradicate one of man's few everyday joys: cleavage.
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Douse your friends in urine when you accidentally swing this pee-filled tube instead of your three iron.
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May reduce your thighs. Will definitely increase your jock itch.
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A penny saved is a penny farted with this toot-producing bank.
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A tie that plays Christmas carols... because we're just not hearing enough of them in the stores these days.
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Pull your muffin top up to your manboobs and adhere that flab down with this glorified packing tape.
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20 of 20Next: The Most Ridiculous SkyMall Products
Suck the grease-and fun-out of every meal.