Drunk Baby: Funny Meme Gallery

So is anyone here into breast feeding?

Sometimes...there are times...and sometimes...it's ridiculous...

What can I say, I'm a light weight.

Just give me the keys to my tricycle.

I love you mom. No really, I mean it.

That wasn't...apple juice.

...And then the bouncer threw me out the door for bringing in my own bottle.

And then I picked up his binky and I threw it in the suckin fandbox.

And then, like 15 babies came at me, and I gave them all booboos with my toy train.

I swear I just had my thumb a second ago. Oh duh, it was in my mouth the whole time.

Can't go to school, haven't had all my shots yet.

Is it nap tiime yet? Feels like nap time.

You got my nose? That, that's pretty funny, man.

And then I was like, that's not my passy.

I have a better idea, let's play peek a boob.

And I was all like, bitch, that ain't no airplane, that's a spoon!

You go tell Dora she can answer her own problems from now on.

No man, it's cool, I piss myself all the time.

I don't know what's going on here, but I like it!

And so I says to her, nah, bitch, here comes my choo choo train.

Dude, you're not driving home, gimmie your training wheels.

So he keeps telling me to say daddy...and I'm thinking, "I know who you are dumbass!!"

And then I says to her, I says, no, I got YOUR nose.

Boy, lemme tells ya...the only thing packing more punch than this drink, is my DIAPAH.

I was this close to playing Stewie on Family Guy.

I'm telling you, if she puts me in that crib one more time, I'm just gonna get on my tricycle, and I'm just gonna go. Just go.

I'm not drunk...yu...you're drunk.

And then she, she asks me, "Where's your mommy?" So I says to her, I says, "I could make YOU a mommy."

Make the wheels on the bus stop going 'round and 'round.

So then I's tells em that'll teach ya not to buy the cheap diapers.

So the cop says "Pull over!" and I said "No, its a cardigan, but thanks for noticing!"

I'm still sober, listen: "ACDBEF THREE"

Then I told the officer, I can't even walk when I'm sober!

And the officers like, "Say the alphabet backwards." And I'm like, "Dude...I haven't said my first word yet."

Nuh-uh, y...y-YOU missed a button.

We should start a bar! We'll call it puzzles.

And then she put her hands over her eyes, and she was gone again.

Babe, my power wheel's outside, lemme take you back to my crib.

12 steps? I'll let you know when I take my first.

Speaks incomprehensible, slurred, gibberish, then, craps his pants and vomits on himself.

Walk in a straight line? Officer, I can barely stand.

Sobriety checkpoint? You better drive the big wheel.

I swear officer she told me she was 18 months.

Then this chick gives me her keys, holy shit man. Those things are amazing. I couldn't sotp jingling those bastards.

Then I says, I says, damn it I forget what I says

That's right, I did it. I pooped in the tub.

Alright, one more round. You'll need to burp me first.

So she lifts her hand up, says, "Peek-a-boo"...and I just SHIT myself!