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Prankster Gets Knocked Out Cold When His Prank Goes Horribly Wrong

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WARNING: SOME NSFW LANGUAGE

Let this be a lesson to all of you wannabe YouTube prank stars out there. Sooner or later, hidden camera stunts will go wrong. And depending on who you are messing with, that could mean a trip to the hospital.

The prank group Simple Misfits sent one of their members out into the public to ask people to kiss his ass. Since this is a prank, his ass was really just a little toy donkey he had in his pocket. Basic pun, basic premise. Until he tried it on the wrong dudes.

So what do you think? Considering he was picking on people with hidden cameras, did the host deserve to be sent to the hospital for stitches or did this particular guy overreact?

 

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10 Serious Facts About Pooping

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I've dabbled in my fair share of fart and poop jokes but the expulsion of feces is no laughing matter. (Deep breath. OK.) It's not. We all poop a little bit differently - form, frequency and size, and there's quite a bit our poop can tell us about each of us. Let's explore all of that, including squatting, which, as it turns out, is a much healthier way of doing business. What's the worst that can happen, besides a smear all over the floor?

You're doing it wrong: Squatting over the can makes for a quicker, more effortless session than sitting

Put simply, humans are not designed to drop bombs from a seated position. Sitting atop porcelain thrones constricts a muscle that keeps the waste in our bodies, while squatting relaxes it, making the process easier.
pooping facts
Do you sometimes strain on the toilet, pushing for dear life as if you're giving birth to poo babies? You may want to try squatting over the toilet next time. You don't necessarily have to squat like a ninja warrior in waiting; a squat on your feet will ease the elimination process, though not quite as effectively. To squat, just pretend you're inside a horrific gas station bathroom and will contract a disease if your buttocks touch the seat. Speaking of diseases ...

Our modern method of seated pooping contributes to (or causes) colon and pelvic diseases
The cavemen and our 19th-century predecessors had it right. Westernized, seated-pooping countries suffer higher rates of colon and pelvic ailments like hemorrhoids, constipation and diverticulitis (feces trapped in colon), to name a few. Squatters experience less straining and stagnation, which causes some of the unpleasantries downstairs.

The word "poop"
It comes from the Middle English word "poupen" - meaning to blow a horn or toot, i.e., to fart. "Yeah I'll be back in 5, Jim, I've got to go poupen."

It's not just you - poop universally smells bad
Bacteria residing inside our bodies cause poop's odorous smell. They produce stinky, sulfurous compounds, the same stuff that causes room-clearing farts. The bacteria aren't problematic, mind you, however if your poop smells really bad, it could indicate a parasite called giardia in the stomach, which causes an infection and particularly foul-smelling farts and poops. But the person will suffer other symptoms like fatigue, stomach cramping and headaches, so you shouldn't have to use smell alone to determine an illness.

Poop is brown because of iron-filled red blood cells in the intestines
Basically, healthy poops are colored brown from a pigment that results from the breakdown of red blood cells in the intestines. They effectively rust over, and the browner the better. Ever spot a green goblin in the can? That's okay, too - it means you've eaten a lot of irony foods like spinach, other leafy greens, beans or red meat. It could also mean you've eat some foods with green food coloring. Note: You should know better than to eat green Jello.

Poop is composed of 75% water
The rest of it is bacteria - dead and living - protein, fiber (indigestible food like cellulose), cells, fats, salts, mucous. The fiber is important because it adds bulk to the poop, basically acting as a lead blocker, helping to move it through the intestines.

The average male produces about 360 pounds of poop a year
That figure is based on an 180-pound guy, as each person creates about one ounce of poop a day for every 12 ounces of body weight, for roughly one pound a day. That's about two copies of you (in poop form) or one Giants DT Shaun Rogers (350 lbs).

Some poops float because they contain a lot of gas
Also known as "floaters," they have a lower density than water, caused by a high gas content. This may happen when bacteria in the body doesn't get expelled as a gas bubble, and takes lodging inside the feces.

The scent of books may cause some to feel the need people to poop
It's called the "Mariko Aoki phenomenon," the urge to poop when visiting a bookstore, a hypothesis suggested by a Japanese woman in the 1980s who described experiencing the urge in a bookstore, which many readers confirmed. The power of suggestion? The coincidence of drinking coffee (a laxative) in a bookstore? It's a topic for further exploration, perhaps a strain on Barnes & Noble's bathroom supplies, which can't be helping the company's bottom line. Pun was NOT intended.

Sloths poop only about once a week during what looks a tree-hugging dance adventure
How else would you describe this? Warning: cute.

 

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The iPhone App That Could Change Horror Movies Forever

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One of the biggest frustrations for horror fans is trying to find something that's original and, well, good. Every time a successful horror film comes out, you can count on dozens of other terrible rip-offs to immediately flood the market. The worst part is that the majority of us diehard fans will sit through utter garbage in hopes of some glimmer of satisfaction. You get to the point to where "good enough" is acceptable.

However, every once in a while, something new and innovative comes along that horror fans should be genuinely excited about.

"Haunting Melissa" is one of those films.

The story of a girl that suddenly goes missing after fearing supernatural forces isn't something we haven't seen before, but it's never been presented in this manner. The concept is so cool and original, it's almost impossible not to be intrigued. Unlike most horror films, "Haunting Melissa" is only available on the iPad and iPhone in an app. I spoke exclusively with creator Neal Edelstein about Haunting Melissa before I took the plunge into it myself.

Mandatory: So this is not a game, correct?

Edelstein: It's not a game. It's a new way to tell a filmed story. You definitely need to wear headphones and crank the sound. Also, turn on your push notifications. It's different because it's so personal with the bits and pieces you get.

Mandatory: How often does the new content become available?

Edelstein: The schedule is actually a mystery. We've built a distribution model and pipeline that is in the cloud 24/7, so you could get 20 minutes on Monday, 15 minutes on Wednesday, 4 minutes on Saturday. Who knows!

Mandatory: I read that the story changes when you rewatch it?

Edelstein: Oh yeah! We invented a technology called Dynamic Story Elements. If you go back and watch, things change. If you saw a ghost in one scene that doesn't mean it'll necessarily be there the next time.

Mandatory: How has the reception been so far?

Edelstein: Beyond my expectations. It's kind of crazy. My target was teens, but it's skewed to all gendered fans. It's been a very fun and rewarding experience.

Mandatory: Do you think they'll be more projects like this?

Edelstein: We're already working on the sequel and we have 10 projects in development right now.


After talking with Neal, I was ready to get started. It was after midnight and all the lights were off, so I popped in my headphones and started the first chapter. While normally I would be distracted by my phone or iPad, "Haunting Melissa" uses the distraction as the medium and creates an extremely personal experience using handheld camera shots and sound effects that are just downright creepy.

At one point there was what seemed to be an older woman singing in a dark, empty room. It seriously felt like she was right behind me. What's cool is that everyone's experience will be slightly different because the next bits of videos are sent to everyone in different intervals and at different times. What's amazing is that no studio was involved. This isn't a theatrical release. This is a new way to experience the genre and, hopefully, is the beginning of many more similar projects.

If you're ready to try it, you can download the app for free here and experience the first chapter for yourself! If you still need a bit more convincing, watch this trailer:

 

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Today's Funniest Photos

15 Hilariously Horrible Pickup Lines That Will Probably Never Work

Am I Allowed to Like This Jim Carrey Movie?

Naked Alabama Man Wanted to Make Tree His Home

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Here's a story and a mugshot to keep in your back pocket the next time your significant other calls you crazy.

An Alabama man was arrested last weekend after climbing 40 feet up a tree near his house while he was butt-ass naked. Drugs were obviously a factor.
Naked man climbs tree and calls it his home
When local authorities responded to the scene, they found 40-year-old Michael Howard Long perched on a branch of the tree, which he told them was his new home.

The local fire department was called in to cut some branches, but Long still refused to come down. Finally, after an hour of negotiations with a naked man probably hopped up on something the rest of world uses to clean their toilets, authorities convinced him to jump into their bucket truck for a safe ride to the ground.

He was immediately arrested and booked on public lewdness and disorderly conduct charges. He then posed for the scariest mugshot since Nick Nolte's 2002 effort.

naked alabama man climbs tree

Long went before a judge yesterday and somehow got the disorderly conduct charge dropped, but we're pretty sure the public lewdness charge along with that mugshot should thankfully prevent him from coaching your kid's little league team this summer.

(via WAFF)

Hey, he's a much better neighbor than this guy: Florida Man Had Sex With His Pit Bull in Front of His Neighbors

 

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Teacher Quiets Noisy Classroom by Threatening Them With 'Game of Thrones' Spoilers

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Here's a story that would bring a smile to Robb Stark's face. Well, it would if he wasn't dead (oops, spoiler alert).

At least one student in France is hailing his math teacher as a genius after he supposedly brought order to his classroom after threatening to reveal the names of every "Game of Thrones" character who dies in the upcoming seasteacher uses game of thrones spoilers to quiet classroomon of the immensely popular HBO series.

According to UPI, when his classroom of roughly 70 students refused to behave themselves, he asked them to raise their hands if they watched "Game of Thrones." And after 75 percent raised their paws, he told them if they didn't quiet down and pay attention, he would begin to spoil the series for everybody in the room:

"Well, I've read all the books. If there is too much noise, I will write the names of the dead on the board. There are enough to fill the whole year, and I can even describe how they die."

At first, the students got a good chuckle out of it. But according to one of his students on the website DansTonChat, a "religious silence" fell upon the classroom when the teacher began writing the names of those who died in Season 3.

Well, that's one way to do it. Or you make sure your classroom isn't the size of a small town.

Here's another way to get your students to pay attention: Teacher's Aide Kaitlin Pearson Gets Her Job Back After Leaked Nude Photos

 

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The Minnesota Twins Pulled Off a Hysterical March Madness Prank

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You probably won't recognize any of the players in this video because they play for the Minnesota Twins. But they pulled off what is easily baseball's prank of the year so far, even though the MLB season is about as young as an R. Kelly hookup.

Starting pitcher Mike Pelfrey played his college ball at Wichita State University, who up until Sunday was the #1 seed in the Midwest bracket of the Men's College Basketball Tournament. The fact that Pelfrey was beyond terrible last season, compiling a 5-13 record and 5.19 ERA, is irrelevant.

Well, manager Ron Gardenhire and his players decided to have some fun with Pelfrey last week while the Shockers of Wichita State were still alive in the tourney. Gardenhire called Pelfrey into his office and told him he had to give an inspirational speech to his alma mater's basketball team.

Here's how it went down:



For the sake of Twins fans, let's hope Pelfrey is a little better on the mound this year than he is at giving inspirational speeches.

(via Deadspin)

He should be glad the Twins didn't make him part of this prank: This Yoga Pants Prank is So Wrong It's Right

 

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The Excuse Translator

World's Laziest USPS Driver Tosses Box With Hard Drive At Garage

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Look, we are all guilty of being a little lazy every now and then. But this guy might just take the award for laziest person on the planet. Even though the USPS employee drives all the way up to the recipient's home, he doesn't bother getting out of the car to set the package containing a heavy hard drive carefully on the ground. Instead, he channels his inner bowler and tosses it at the garage door. We're pretty sure this isn't how you're supposed to handle fragile packages which makes this postal employee a complete jerk. However, we'd still pick the guy to be on our bowling team.

 

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9 Ways to Effectively Pee With Morning Wood

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If you are part of our male audience, you've been there. You wake up in the morning and really have to urinate, but your flag is flying at full-mast. If you decide you gotta go right away, you risk making a mess. Well, wave those morning troubles goodbye, because thanks to this handy illustration, there are now nine ways for you to effectively pee with morning wood. Start using them tomorrow!


via bens.tips

 

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Amanda Booth is Your February 2014 Playmate of the Month

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New to the sexy scene, Amanda Booth has saved us a seat as her new biggest fans with her February 2014 Playboy Playmate of the Month spot. The blonde bombshell manages to be an athlete, model and dog lover all rolled into one tight, smooth package. Amanda makes friends easily, which is great because we'd definitely like to be friends with her! As Playboy's February centerfold, she worked with photographer Tony Kelly, whom she's worked with for five years, and brings out her wild, crazy girl side. As a lover of love, Amanda made it just in time with her red ensemble for Valentine's Day. She's hot on Instagram, too, so check her out!

 

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Today's Funniest Photos

These Students Are The 20 Laziest People on Earth

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Very few beings on this planet are as lazy as students. It doesn't matter what age - if you're still in school, there's a very decent chance that you will do anything you can to avoid exerting physical effort. If you need proof, check out these responses one teacher got when he polled 20 students about the laziest thing they've ever done.

lazy students

Via Imgur

 

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University of Georgia Basketball Players Cannot Participate in Orgies

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It looks like the coach is going to have to be careful about all of his talk about being a team on and off the court.
no orgies for georgia men's basketball players
According to Sports Illustrated, a few journalism students at the University of Maryland recently looked into what other colleges across the country are doing to make sure their student-athletes don't do anything stupid with their social media accounts.

It turns out the University of Georgia men's basketball program controls not only what its players are allowed to post on Facebook and Twitter, but also each player's sexual practices. And while most of what the program demands from its players in regards to treating women with respect is merely common sense, some of what is listed seems more like scripture from an unpopular religion rather than good advice:

Stay out of gray areas, orgies and gang bangs are inappropriate.
Don't spend all of your energy in the bed all night
Hicky's (sic)/passion marks should not be ever noticed by coaches
One. Not two or three girlfriends ...


Jesus H, isn't having two or three girlfriends at the same time what college is all about? Looks like my kid will be playing hoops and pursuing a mass communication degree at Mississippi State.

We assume sharing this story on Facebook is a no-no for the players as well: The Secret History of Porn

 

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Watch This Construction Worker's Incredibly Daring Rescue From a Massive Building Fire

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This is the most incredible real-life fire escape you will ever witness. The incredible footage was captured at the construction site for a Houston, Texas, apartment complex, where a blaze had quickly spread throughout the entire site. One final construction worker was still stuck on a balcony as a fire truck ladder approached. The worker had to buy himself some time by swinging down from the fourth floor balcony to the third. He then quickly leaps onto the rescue ladder just before the entire fourth floor collapses. Amazingly, all construction workers who were in the building were accounted for and no injuries have been reported.

 

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Debunking Radiation Rumors in the Media

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No matter who you are or how you wear your pants, one thing is certain: you can't believe everything you read, especially regarding radiation rumors in the media. Some news outlets would rather cover the local chili cook-off than deliver important information, and while many major news sources avoid consistent, in-depth coverage on rradiation map of US, radiation west coastadiation in North America after the 2011 disaster of Japan's Fukushima, many less credible news outlets are more than willing to dish out half-baked radiation speculation like it's unmarked Halloween bullshit candy.

This is not to say there's zero radiation along the California coastline, or that we couldn't eventually be subjected to some blowback from the distant nuclear meltdown, but we need to differentiate between fact and fear. This is debunking unaccredited news sources and misinformed journalists - clearly unlike myself - who manipulate their ability to get people's attention best when they throw their big numbers, glowing maps of terror and hundred-dollar words to create a stir. It's not yet time to sell our beach homes and blame our hair loss on Japan, despite what some might say.

Media Misinformation & Public Panic

If you recall when cell phones came out, everybody panicked they were going to give themselves brain tumors from electromagnetic radiation. Although there is the potential for adverse effects, much like radiation from Japan, cell phones are still all the rage, just as our oceans are currently not yet hazardous towards the North American border.

A lot of the scare has come from people's fear of contaminated seafood. Kelp samples reportedly collected in San Diego had radioactive traces, meaning that bigger fish, which eat the kelp and are potentially consumed by humans, are contaminated as well. There were claims that a large number of sailors working in the Pacific were contracting sickness from radiation. However, according to a recent Forbes article, smoking is more dangerous for you than Fukushima radiation will likely ever be, claiming that the risk of cancer is likely only slightly elevated by radiation, whereas smoking cigarettes can increase the likelihood of cancer by 2,000 percent. Oh, and eating a banana is technically more dangerous, as well. So maybe our focus is on the wrong information.

The problem here is media overhyping a hard-to-pin-down topic with no discernible future harm, taking half facts and exaggerating them in the digital universe. Just because someone dreamt up a story about a mouthy Justin Bieber getting slugged by Los Angeles Clippers star Blake Griffin and dressed it in dated pictures doesn't make it true. Anyone can post anything to the Internet; that's both its beauty and its flaw. It's our job to filter the information we get as newsworthy or not.

There were reportedly some trillion becquerel of radiation exposed in the Pacific Ocean since the nuclear disaster in Japan. But what the hell is a becquerel? Is that a lot? Well, it's actually a standard unit for measuring radiation emittefish contaminated with radiationd from radioactive material, and it's giving Americans nightmares of food poisoning and yellow skin, and so far, nobody of integrity has found any hard evidence that says we're screwed.

In addition, samples taken from fish and kelp in the Pacific - a project called Kelp Watch 2014 - have been noted as "contaminated with radiation," but what news sources fail to specify is the amount. In recorded studies, radiation levels are only slightly higher, three percent at most, than average recorded levels and still remain far below harmful levels as of February 2014. Did you think the government was going to just let people get sick and die? No, my fellow Americans, not just yet they won't.

What's important to focus on are the facts; everything else is just noise. The biggest rumor or scare with radiation from Fukushima is how harmful fish from the Pacific are to consume, and how will that change, if at all, in the near future.

What We Know Now

News reports have been speculating for about two years, mishandling information about a topic that nobody has all the facts on. So let's focus on what we know. According to BBC News as of late February 2014, even the peak levels of radiation sampled in the Pacific Ocean along the North American coastline are well within acceptable standards, but the actual extent of radiation won't be known for sure until the spring.

In early 2014, the head scientist at one of the world's top oceanic institutions (who specializes personally in oceanic radiation) said the predictions of radiation causing great harm is low, but that nothing can be known unless testing is done. Since people haven't been told for certain we're going to be all right, a growing sense of hypochondria is merging along the western coast of the U.S.

Reports of coastal marine life - polar bears and sea lions namely - losing their hair and their young dying off have been blamed by radiation with no actual proof of any direct connection. It can't be ruled out, but it can't be ruled in as the cause either, especially when all the testing done thus far claims any high radiation areas in the Pacific have leveled off and remains far from harmful.

Certain blogs have leaked posts about the amount of radiation being leaked into the Pacific Ocean near Japan, claiming 300 tons of radioactive water exposed everyday. That might very well be true, but it's actually a tiny spec when compared to the ocean's approximate 187 quintillion gallons, which makes it no real threat to us from 5,000 miles away. Diluted over time, that speck in an otherwise endless ocean would not so quickly endanger a continent that far away. Everyone from Tepco to Tokyo University has specified different numbers, but it's irrelevant to America as of now.

Government Involvement

The U.S. government is not reportedly unloading billions of dollars in order to learn more about this potential threat, but the general public's biggest fear is typically what they don't have the answers for. Because of the lack of action, people assume the worst, which is that the government doesn't care for the well-being of a generous portion of its population.

Smaller news sources speculate the government carelessly signed off on high levels of radiation in the Pacific coastline while simultaneously purchasing large quantities of potassium iodide, a chemical for combating internal radioactive contamination. So far any testing reports that the levels of radiation are still safe. As for the potassium iodide, isn't it the responsibility of the government to be prepared in case of a crisis, to exert precaution to avoid panic? By attaining large amounts of the chemical, people can't take advantage of each other by stocking up in a classic American supply-and-demand black market.

Anything the government has done thus far has been hush-hush as there is currently nothing to panic about in terms of our safety. Promoting large amounts of non-information in major news sources will only alarm people, but smaller news outlets see it as an opening to do just that.

How We Can Live Without Fear

As we said before, this isn't to say we are radiation-free, but to simply report on exaggerations of the severity of North America's condition. The reality is we're all subject to radiation everyday of our lives, even before Chernobyl, Japan or any other series of natural disasters. The sun, our cell phones, radiation therapy and the ocean are all sources of a certain degree of radiation we've grown accustomed to, which are regulated currently at safe levels.

You can shield yourselves in your homes and take as many anti-radiation vitamins as you think you need, but what radiation rumors, among other things, point toward is our need to live more health conscious lives, not fearful ones. There are sites dedicated to fighting basic radiation exposure through food, mainly by regularly ingesting common items like garlic, onion, bee pollen and chlorophyll. Educate yourself, filter your news, and stay vigilant, protective and cautious of our ocean, and you'll be just fine for now. And until something changes, sleep sound knowing you don't have to sell your home or lose all your hair in the near future.

Other sources: Deep Sea News, GlobalResearch, Guardian Liberty Voice, Skeptoid

 

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Terrifying Staten Island Clown Turns Out To Be Marketing Stunt

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Let's be honest. All clowns are terrifying. Not true, you say? Ask yourself how many members of your family have day jobs as clowns, and the answer is probably zero. In fact, there is probably a better chance of your entire family getting slaughtered by a clown than one of them actually being a clown, and that's because all clowns are creepy as hell.

Case in point, a clown roaming the streets of Staten Island has been terrorizing residents recently by doing nothing more than waving at them:

terrifying staten island clown is a movie stunt
Scared Staten Island residents have taken to social media, and #SIclown has been trending on Twitter because of it. But thankfully, it turns out this particular clown isn't a lunatic looking to raid your daughter's panties drawer, but a marketing stunt for a local horror movie production company instead.

According to CBS New York, published reports are indicating that Fuzz on the Lens Productions is behind this nightmare, and the only social media photos of the clown seem to have been posted by friends of the company as part of the stunt.

Phew. Looks like local residents can now go back their nightly ritual of SportsCenter and internet porn without worrying about this clown peeking in the windows.

People in the UK hate bloody clowns as well: Spooky Clown Wreaking Havoc on Strangers in UK Town

 

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11 Differences to Expect Between 'Captain America: The Winter Soldier' and the Comics

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