The 10 Best Things About April

No. 9 - Earth Day (April 22)

Ah, the wonders of nature. If everyday were Earth Day, well it probably wouldn't seem as important, but maybe we'd live in a cleaner world. Earth Day is meant as an honest reminder to be appreciative and respectful of the ground we walk on, the trees we sleep under and the beaches we prefer to walk on without getting syringed. Much like any good holiday, we wonder why things can't always be this way, but the truth is some people are just irresponsible a-holes.

So this Earth Day, clean up the litter in your neighborhood, plant a tree and rescue a kitten from another tree. At the end of the day, you should feel good about yourself, and if you don't, then there are much bigger problems with you. It's also National Week of the Ocean the first week of April and Environmental Awareness Week the third week. Big month for nature, so be good to it!

No. 8 - Record Store Day (April 20)

Even if you're agoraphobic and resent natural light touching your skin, here's one day it's imperative to get out of the house. Record Store Day is a tradition, not long held but a tradition nonetheless, of supporting your local music provider.

If it weren't for music, we'd all be beating each other senseless from lack of sleep due to scarce sounds of the ocean and whales mating in the moonlight. So be kind to the people who provide nice things. Get up early and grab yourself some record deals, maybe a record player if you haven't already. CDs and DVDs were a temporary replacement for the good stuff; now get back to where smart people left off before you find yourself at another Bon Jovi concert with your mother-in-law straddling your shoulders flashing her knockers yet again.

And don't tell us 4/20 is also a marijuana-smoking holiday. We know all about it, and for many of you the celebration has already begun (or never stopped).

No. 7 - International Pillow Fight Day (April 6)

The chief objective of a man's day is to somehow get the topless pillow fights of lady slumber parties out of the house and into the workplace. Thankfully, International Pillow Fight Day is that day, and with enough corralling, awareness and preemptive planning, you could achieve your dream, gentlemen, one sexy pillowcase at a time.

As an added bonus, you also have a reason to more or less knock someone's lights out in the office with a pillow, preferably Connie, the narc who always talks badly about you when you leave the break room, or Dale, the guy who always eats your hummus and thinks no one is onto his tricks.

No. 6 - National Wear Pajamas to Work Day (April 18)

It's too bad that this day doesn't fall on Pillow Fight Day, since that would make the pillow fight a shoe-in for every office space. But seriously, it's time you got to show off your SpongeBob onesie with the butt flap, even if you have to steal it back from your son. So take advantage of it (if your boss allows it, of course).

Side note: Take Sons and Daughters to Work Day is also in April on the 25th. So if you're not fired after hitting a co-worker with a pillow and then wearing your jammies to work, you can enjoy that day, as well.

No. 5 - World Autism Awareness Day (April 2)

It would be remiss of us to not include a good cause in this list, as there is an awareness day we should all consider as we go about our belligerent lives. World Autism Awareness Day is a time for not only bringing awareness but also doing unique fundraising in order to help people with autism. On this day, we can take some time to help out locally or donate to a good cause in order to do as much as possible, especially for children with autism who struggle with it.

Not-for-profits like Surfers Healing, with Scott Caan as their celebrity spokesman, provide surf trips to autistic children as a sort of therapeutic reward for their efforts and bring light into those lives. There are many more organizations out there like this, so check them out on this day.

No. 4 - Arbor Day (April 27)

April Fools! Nobody gives a hoot about Arbor Day, nor does anyone really know what the hell it is (jk, we know it is a good tree-planting day for Mother Earth).

Just remember that April 1 is April Fools' Day, not so much because it's important to play a prank on somebody, but it's important not to look like a complete idiot immediately when someone pranks you. You must be prepared.

And hey, if you get a hankering yourself to shake things up and get the office talking, go for it. Maybe bring in a medicinal marijuana cake from the pot shop for dessert and tell your co-workers it's just a regular cake. That should whip them into a frenzy. When your boss fires you, though, don't laugh, because that's probably for real.

No. 3 - Husband Appreciation Day (April 20)

It's the Valentine's Day for men: Husband Appreciation Day. If you're a married man, this is sort of like the reception after your funeral, except you get to come. Don't expect much from your lady since it's not a commercially successful holiday, but if you give her enough notice as to the date, you could finally have your day.

You'll most likely want to go to the restaurant of your choice, go to the game with the boys and later have a wild time and stay out real late without calling her to tell her about the college girls you're hitting on. But odds are you'll just end up on the couch all day wasting away until she calls your name in the most annoying way possible, asking you to kill a spider or unclog the toilet. Ah, marriage.

Of course, any guy not willing to commit to marriage loses out and is stuck with yet another day of doing anything he wants to do. Better buckle down, boys. You don't want to miss out on this day.

Related: Check out some single guy advice on Mandatory

No. 2 - Coachella (April 12-14, April 19-21)

What makes warmer months most recognizable is when we're eager to pay hundreds of dollars to pack up the car, sit in standstill traffic, camp near a bunch of tweekers and ignore bathing all in the name of music. That's right; it's festival season.

Now that Austin's SXSW is over, we can get down to the dirty festivals, starting with California's Coachella this April and moving into Lollapalooza, Bonnaroo and many more in the coming months. Expect a lot of the same bands from last year, some new hipster doofuses and some band that is way too old to be playing in this heat without some oxygen nearby. Rock on.