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Every kid is taught to draw a hand turkey early in their lives. What most parents don't know is that you can tell a lot about your child based on their hand turkeys. In this gallery, we analyze your child's turkey drawings - without any qualifications whatsoever - and tell you what it says about them.
Much like this beak-less turkey, your child lacks the ability to speak freely and instead simply hides his pain behind a forced smile.
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2 of 14
A hand turkey with a thick outline reveals that your child often hides behind a tough exterior but is really quite vulnerable. Or not. Again, I'm not actually qualified to make any of these diagnoses.
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3 of 14
Not being able to properly spell the common turkey sound does not bode well for your child's future resume writing. Also, your child's cartoon-sized fingers are going to make it very difficult for him/her to perform even the simplest of tasks, such as opening a can of soda or hitting less than three letters when typing on a keyboard.
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4 of 14
The yellow feather amongst a collection of blue ones is your child screaming for you to notice him/her. Also, the fact that your child drew the turkey blue means that you are letting him/her watch way too much "Billy Madison" (see video below).
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5 of 14
This drawing by your child reveals that his/her real father is Rip Taylor.
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6 of 14
Your child is a pathological liar. If he/she really liked turkey, he/she would know that they don't have multicolored feathers with stitches.
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7 of 14
Your daughter needs to learn how to share. There is more than enough turkey for everyone, Molly!
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8 of 14
Your child is an individual. Rather than placing the face on the thumb, like every other conformist, your child chose to be different. But don't let that go to your head, your kid still sucks at drawing.
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9 of 14
The fact that your child drew a turkey wearing the hat of the people that killed and ate it reveals a tendency towards sadism. It's probably best to keep the kid away from sharp objects at the table this Thanksgiving.
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10 of 14
The force field that your child has drawn around their poorly drawn turkeys shows sympathy for the bird that meets its demise solely for your family's enjoyment. But don't worry, the kid will forget all about it once that bird is cooked and doused in delicious gravy.
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11 of 14
Your child is overindulgent. Just because there is an entire box of crayons doesn't mean he/she has to use every single one until the whole sheet of paper is covered. This child will bankrupt you soon enough if you don't deliver a quick lesson in using things sparingly.
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12 of 14
Don't feel bad. Even Van Gogh had a difficult time drawing a turkey. Nah, that's not true. You should probably convince your child to spend less time painting and maybe more time reading.
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13 of 14
The only logical conclusion I can come to with this picture is that your child can probably make a killer Cosmopolitan.
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14 of 14Next: These Are The Worst Parents Ever
Your child has gotten into your medication. Please consult a physician immediately.
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