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Bill Murray Pretzel Thief
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Eugena Washington Is Making The Holidays Look Extra Delicious
Eugena Washington is a whole other kind of smoking, as she puffs a cigar and hops into a bubblebath with Playboy. She may just be Miss December to you, but to us, she's another reason to celebrate the holidays without any pants on. Decked out in a gold dress, leopard lingerie and a few other revealing ensembles, it's clear that the holidays just got a whole lot sweeter, thanks to Eugena. Seriously, wait for the bubble bath.
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Today's Funny Photos
Friday is here and, despite what your boss says, you ain't got shit to do. So let's all laugh at these funny photos together and then start drankin'. WHO'S WITH ME?
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Click here for more funny photos.
Click here for more funny photos.
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The Ultimate Guide To Foolproof Pickup Lines
Pickup lines should never be delivered as pickup lines, but more as a joke to showcase one's wittiness. The more clever it is, the better chance you have at getting to know the cutie at the bar. A pickup line should be a way of determining if she's willing to connect.
Since that's the case, I've scoured the Internet for the greatest pickup lines to impress a woman, as well as those that could result in you heading home alone in a cab with nothing more than the pink impression of said woman's fragile hand tattooed on your face.
But first, some of the worst (because they're either cheesy as hell, used too much, or are just hilariously offensive):
"What's the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I don't have a Ferrari."
![Worst Pick Up Lines]()
"Are you from Iraq? Because I like the way you Baghdad ass up."
"There will only be seven planets left after I destroy Uranus."
"If you were a vegetable, you'd be a cute-cumber."
"Do I know you? Because you look an awful lot like my next girlfriend."
"Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see."
"Can I follow you home? Because my parents always told me to follow my dreams."
Next, we have some lines that are clever and non-offensive, but still have potential to fail:
"Are you a fruit? Because honeydew you know how fine you look right now?"
![Worst Pick Up Lines]()
"Hi, my name is [your name], but you can call me tonight."
"I'm not actually this tall. I'm just sitting on my wallet."
"Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"
![Worst Pick Up Lines]()
"Seeing you is like getting the 11th McNugget in a 10-piece meal."
"Want to go halfsies on a bastard child?" (Okay, this one's slightly offensive.)
"You're hotter than the bottom of my laptop."
"Are you an orphanage? Because I want to give you my children." (This one, too.)
![Worst Pick Up Lines]()
"Is your name WiFi? Because I'm feeling a connection."
"Hi there, I'm doing a survey -- what's your name?"
"I think there's something wrong with my phone. Could you try calling me and see if it rings?"
![Worst Pick Up Lines]()
"I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent on your curves." (For the nerds out there)
"Are you Irish? Because when I look at you, my penis is Dublin."
Finally, for the ultimate foolproof pickup lines:
"Can I take you out to dinner? Just smile for yes, or do a backflip for no."
"Want to eat cookie dough together sometime?"
"I bet you $10 you're going to turn me down."
"My buddies bet me that I wouldn't be able to start a conversation with the most beautiful girl in the bar. Want to buy some drinks with their money?"
"Want to have good sex?: [She says no.] "Then come to my place!"
Related: 15 Foolproof Pickup Lines (Sort Of)
Since that's the case, I've scoured the Internet for the greatest pickup lines to impress a woman, as well as those that could result in you heading home alone in a cab with nothing more than the pink impression of said woman's fragile hand tattooed on your face.
But first, some of the worst (because they're either cheesy as hell, used too much, or are just hilariously offensive):
"What's the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I don't have a Ferrari."
"Are you from Iraq? Because I like the way you Baghdad ass up."
"There will only be seven planets left after I destroy Uranus."
"If you were a vegetable, you'd be a cute-cumber."
"Do I know you? Because you look an awful lot like my next girlfriend."
"Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see."
"Can I follow you home? Because my parents always told me to follow my dreams."
Next, we have some lines that are clever and non-offensive, but still have potential to fail:
"Are you a fruit? Because honeydew you know how fine you look right now?"
"Hi, my name is [your name], but you can call me tonight."
"I'm not actually this tall. I'm just sitting on my wallet."
"Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"
"Seeing you is like getting the 11th McNugget in a 10-piece meal."
"Want to go halfsies on a bastard child?" (Okay, this one's slightly offensive.)
"You're hotter than the bottom of my laptop."
"Are you an orphanage? Because I want to give you my children." (This one, too.)
"Is your name WiFi? Because I'm feeling a connection."
"Hi there, I'm doing a survey -- what's your name?"
"I think there's something wrong with my phone. Could you try calling me and see if it rings?"
"I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent on your curves." (For the nerds out there)
"Are you Irish? Because when I look at you, my penis is Dublin."
Finally, for the ultimate foolproof pickup lines:
"Can I take you out to dinner? Just smile for yes, or do a backflip for no."
"Want to eat cookie dough together sometime?"
"I bet you $10 you're going to turn me down."
"My buddies bet me that I wouldn't be able to start a conversation with the most beautiful girl in the bar. Want to buy some drinks with their money?"
"Want to have good sex?: [She says no.] "Then come to my place!"
Related: 15 Foolproof Pickup Lines (Sort Of)
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This Week's 20 Funniest Tweets
Another week, another batch of the most hilarious tweets, compiled just for you. Be sure to follow these guys and gals, and check back here every week for more jokes you can tell your friends and pretend you came up with them. They'll think you're hilarious, but inside you'll be cold and dead.
Follow @robfee on Twitter.
Want more? Check out last week's hilarious tweets.
Follow @robfee on Twitter.
A good prank is that you can donate your body to anyone, not just science
- Pixelated Boat (@pixelatedboat) December 3, 2015[High school reunion] Hey guys! Remember me!? "No" How about now? *puts an entire toilet on my head* (in unison) CHRIS!
- Tommytoughstuff (@Tommytoughstuff) August 17, 2015when u deliver a sick burn and ur friend got ur back pic.twitter.com/AGJ99qH01l
- Sophia Benoit (@1followernodad) December 5, 2015What if you met your soulmate but he loved to clap when the plane lands?
- alix (@alixmcalpine) June 1, 2015haha remember when you were a kid you'd hide inside the clothes racks at stores. can't do that as an adult. someone's stupid kid is in there
- tara shoe (@tarashoe) December 5, 2015"smh this is why u gotta take them swimming on the first date" -man who keeps accidentally dating tortoises instead of turtles
- treasure✨ (@imteddybless) December 5, 2015when u go from being a community college student 2 a jaded harvard professor pic.twitter.com/qpCx3HZWns
- BRANDON WARDELL (@BRANDONWARDELL) December 4, 2015"Hi, 2 people for dinner" "I have a table overlooking the ocean" "Is it near a power outlet? My phone's dying" "No" "Fuck you-we're leaving"
- Lauren Reeves (@laurenreeves) December 5, 2015Unbelievable. pic.twitter.com/a1tTp091X9
- Paul (@FrenulumBreve) December 1, 2015DOG OWNER: Who's a good boy! [dog wags tail excitedly] DOG OWNER: You are! Yes you are [I emerge from the bushes] I am also a good boy
- Dan O'Brien (@OtherDanOBrien) September 23, 2015*sits 27 hours for an oil on canvas portrait* omg delete that. Bartholomew i'm serious do not fucking hang that in the Great Hall
- Conor Tripler (@ConorTripler) November 29, 2015Opinions are like assholes. I shared mine on the internet and strangers got mad at me
- Rad Kyle (@KyleMcDowell86) September 18, 2015I pause my TV on a group of ppl laughing, then tell them a funny story about my dog. & it's like we're all laughing!! pic.twitter.com/JBnxsFrHce
- sicily (@toomanytoes) July 7, 2015"I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here" was originally going to be called 'I will literally eat horse dick to be on TV again'
- Adam Hess (@adamhess1) December 10, 2015Skincare tips: stay away from sunlight, drink plenty of cave river water, turn into an immortal salamander. pic.twitter.com/mnEWbV069r
- the sex pooper (@lonelydandruff) December 1, 2015I'd like to get a haircut. "Sure, which stranger do you want touching your head and talking for thirty straight minutes?" Uhhh... him?
- Joe Kelly (@joekellyjk47) December 8, 2015when ur a dedicated detective that investigates these vicious felonies but ur crush walks by pic.twitter.com/OBjvIO0UAb
- me, an intellectual (@eatyeIlow) November 30, 2015I'm drunk so I'll just fuckin say it: Those dudes in Big were way too good way too fast at the floor piano
- Dan Hopper (@DanHopp) November 30, 2015*swerves onto exit 208* Sorry mom something came up pic.twitter.com/1aAc8iuFIo
- Leah Tiscione (@LeahTiscione) September 1, 2015at Forever 31 everything is way more expensive and none of it makes you happy anymore
- the garbage shit boy (@davedittell) January 7, 2015Want more? Check out last week's hilarious tweets.
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Rock Music's Greatest Collaborations
Rock 'n' roll is all fun and games until someone gets a wild hair up their turd cannon, and then you end up with some botched mismatches that sound like cacophony abortions. Or maybe I'm just being dramatic. Sometimes, rarely but potentially, we get one of rock music's great collaborations, and then you end up with some botched mismatches of songs like this amazing list below, some of which include the music videos themselves. Behold and endure, young rockers, your music education awaits you.
Mick Jagger & David Bowie - Dancing in the Streets
![Greatest Rock Music Collaborations, david bowie, mick jagger, dancing in the streets]()
Corniest. Music video. Ever. But in a way, it's kind of the best, right? The 1985 collaboration between the artist formerly known as Ziggy Stardust and The Rolling Stones rocking frontman earned them an MTV Music Video Award for Best Overall Performance, whatever that means. It means this is the first time we seriously considered Jagger to possibly be batting for both teams.
Robert Plant & Alison Krauss - Gone Gone Gone
![Greatest Rock Music Collaborations, robert planet, alison krauss, gone gone gone]()
The 2007 collaboration of Led Zeppelin's leading man with bluegrass-country singer Alison Krauss gave people a different glimpse into the life of the melodic singer's style, garnering the two a Grammy for Best Pop Collaboration With Vocals. The song, part of a T. Bone Burnett produced full length "Raising Sand," features a low energy, smooth rhythm to the speed of a good Johnny Cash song but with the smooth vocals of Plant and his wing woman.
Jimmy Page & Puff Daddy - Come With Me
![Greatest Rock Collaborations]()
Before he was P. Diddy or Diddy or whoever the hell he is, Sean "Puffy" Combs actually put out some half-decent music in his day, including his "Kashmir" inspired "Come With Me" to the tune of Led Zeppelin's Jimmy Page for the horrid "Godzilla" movie of the '90s. The single was released in 1998 as part of the movie soundtrack and featured inspirational themes of the film itself.
Lenny Kravitz & Vanessa Paradis - Be My Baby
![Greatest Rock Music Collaborations, lenny kravitz, vanessa paradis, come with me]()
Before her days with Depp, the French singer actually dated and worked quite a bit with bombastic rocker, Lenny Kravitz, who wrote most of Paradis' music upon her move to the United States. The 1992 song was a hit, featuring Kravitz and his guitar with her vocals lovingly laced overtop.
She & Him (Zooey Deschanel & M. Ward) - In the Sun
![Greatest Rock Music Collaborations, she and him, in the sun]()
The "New Girl" star got her music chops out on the market with singer-songwriter M. Ward with their old fashioned, sunny pop licks. Featuring the cheery vocals and spunky dance moves of Zooey Deschanel and the smooth guitar licks of Ward, you get the happiest sound song created in 2010. But wouldn't you rather have dark lyrics sugarcoated in happy sounding songs instead?
Santana & Rob Thomas - Smooth
![Greatest Rock Music Collaborations, santana, rob thomas, smooth]()
Anybody who turned on the radio in 1999 got a load of this song every single time, as Santana invited Matchbox 20 singer, Rob Thomas, on board for his "Supernatural" release. The album went platinum 15 times and won nine Grammys, including Album of the Year.
Noel Gallagher & Johnny Marr - The Ballad of the Mighty I
![Greatest Rock Music Collaborations, noel gallagher, johhny marr, the ballad of the mighty I]()
The former Oasis guitarist who gave us "Champagne Supernova" and "Wonderwall" went successfully solo, and amidst doing his second release, "Chasing Yesterday," we got this impressive single to round out the record. Featuring guitar chops only the former lead man of The Smiths, Johnny Marr, could deliver, we get an up tempo pop rock song for Brit rock, Noel Gallagher.
Rage Against the Machine & Maynard James Keenan (Tool) - Know Your Enemy
![Greatest Rock Music Collaborations, rage against the machine]()
The debut, self-titled Rage Against the Machine record dropped in a little vocal appearance from prized vocalist Maynard James Keenan of Tool on their 1992 release. The song, despite not being one of the band's initial singles, is considered by some critics as just as memorable as hits from the record like "Killing in the Name."
Aerosmith & Run-D.M.C. - Walk This Way
![Greatest Rock Music Collaborations, aerosmith, run dmc, walk this way]()
The 1986 collaboration of '80s rockers Aerosmith and Run-D.M.C. seemed like an unlikely mix until you heard it. Run-D.M.C. hijacked the 1975 single from Aerosmith's "Toys in the Attic" and re-created it with their remix in the height of their fame. The music video features Aerosmith practicing, pissing off some urban folk (Run D.M.C.), and then ends with them taking over the vocals of the song and adding in their usual scratching. The song won the Soul Train Music Award for Best Rap Single in 1987.
Atoms for Peace - Before Your Very Eyes
![Greatest Rock Music Collaborations, atoms for peace]()
It was such a good collaboration between Radiohead's Thom Yorke and Red Hot Chili Pepper bassist Flea (and other highly talented musicians) that they made an entire record behind the supergroup surname Atoms for Peace. This was their third single from their debut album, "Amok." Both Radiohead and the Peppers are set to release new music in 2016, so it's not likely we'll get more of this collaboration in the near future.
Mick Jagger & David Bowie - Dancing in the Streets
Corniest. Music video. Ever. But in a way, it's kind of the best, right? The 1985 collaboration between the artist formerly known as Ziggy Stardust and The Rolling Stones rocking frontman earned them an MTV Music Video Award for Best Overall Performance, whatever that means. It means this is the first time we seriously considered Jagger to possibly be batting for both teams.
Robert Plant & Alison Krauss - Gone Gone Gone
The 2007 collaboration of Led Zeppelin's leading man with bluegrass-country singer Alison Krauss gave people a different glimpse into the life of the melodic singer's style, garnering the two a Grammy for Best Pop Collaboration With Vocals. The song, part of a T. Bone Burnett produced full length "Raising Sand," features a low energy, smooth rhythm to the speed of a good Johnny Cash song but with the smooth vocals of Plant and his wing woman.
Jimmy Page & Puff Daddy - Come With Me
Before he was P. Diddy or Diddy or whoever the hell he is, Sean "Puffy" Combs actually put out some half-decent music in his day, including his "Kashmir" inspired "Come With Me" to the tune of Led Zeppelin's Jimmy Page for the horrid "Godzilla" movie of the '90s. The single was released in 1998 as part of the movie soundtrack and featured inspirational themes of the film itself.
Lenny Kravitz & Vanessa Paradis - Be My Baby
Before her days with Depp, the French singer actually dated and worked quite a bit with bombastic rocker, Lenny Kravitz, who wrote most of Paradis' music upon her move to the United States. The 1992 song was a hit, featuring Kravitz and his guitar with her vocals lovingly laced overtop.
She & Him (Zooey Deschanel & M. Ward) - In the Sun
The "New Girl" star got her music chops out on the market with singer-songwriter M. Ward with their old fashioned, sunny pop licks. Featuring the cheery vocals and spunky dance moves of Zooey Deschanel and the smooth guitar licks of Ward, you get the happiest sound song created in 2010. But wouldn't you rather have dark lyrics sugarcoated in happy sounding songs instead?
Santana & Rob Thomas - Smooth
Anybody who turned on the radio in 1999 got a load of this song every single time, as Santana invited Matchbox 20 singer, Rob Thomas, on board for his "Supernatural" release. The album went platinum 15 times and won nine Grammys, including Album of the Year.
Noel Gallagher & Johnny Marr - The Ballad of the Mighty I
The former Oasis guitarist who gave us "Champagne Supernova" and "Wonderwall" went successfully solo, and amidst doing his second release, "Chasing Yesterday," we got this impressive single to round out the record. Featuring guitar chops only the former lead man of The Smiths, Johnny Marr, could deliver, we get an up tempo pop rock song for Brit rock, Noel Gallagher.
Rage Against the Machine & Maynard James Keenan (Tool) - Know Your Enemy
The debut, self-titled Rage Against the Machine record dropped in a little vocal appearance from prized vocalist Maynard James Keenan of Tool on their 1992 release. The song, despite not being one of the band's initial singles, is considered by some critics as just as memorable as hits from the record like "Killing in the Name."
Aerosmith & Run-D.M.C. - Walk This Way
The 1986 collaboration of '80s rockers Aerosmith and Run-D.M.C. seemed like an unlikely mix until you heard it. Run-D.M.C. hijacked the 1975 single from Aerosmith's "Toys in the Attic" and re-created it with their remix in the height of their fame. The music video features Aerosmith practicing, pissing off some urban folk (Run D.M.C.), and then ends with them taking over the vocals of the song and adding in their usual scratching. The song won the Soul Train Music Award for Best Rap Single in 1987.
Atoms for Peace - Before Your Very Eyes
It was such a good collaboration between Radiohead's Thom Yorke and Red Hot Chili Pepper bassist Flea (and other highly talented musicians) that they made an entire record behind the supergroup surname Atoms for Peace. This was their third single from their debut album, "Amok." Both Radiohead and the Peppers are set to release new music in 2016, so it's not likely we'll get more of this collaboration in the near future.
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Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilariously Creepy
If you aren't familiar with Elf on the Shelf, it's pretty much this little bashful elf character from a children's book that has taken off and become hugely popular. People now like to put that elf in funny situations and post pictures of it. But one dad decided to go another route and actually become the elf himself.
![Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilarious And Creepy]()
It all started when Joe Wynberg decided to dress up as an elf and sit on the fridge while his wife, Megan, took the photo:
"We thought, 'Wouldn't it be funny if we did a human Elf On A Shelf?,'" Joe explains. "It kind of took off from there."
While Joe and his wife have four kids, they still promise to find the time to take a new picture every day leading up to Christmas. Check out the hilarious (and kinda creepy) photos they've taken so far, thanks to their Facebook.
![Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilarious And Creepy]()
![Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilarious And Creepy]()
![Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilarious And Creepy]()
![Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilarious And Creepy]()
![Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilarious And Creepy]()
![Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilarious And Creepy]()
![Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilarious And Creepy]()
![Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilarious And Creepy]()
![Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilarious And Creepy]()
![Dad Dresses Up As 'Elf On A Shelf' And The Pictures Are Hilarious And Creepy]()
h/t The Chive
More ideas for Joe and his wife: 20 Horribly Inappropriate Ways To Pose Your Child's Elf On A Shelf
It all started when Joe Wynberg decided to dress up as an elf and sit on the fridge while his wife, Megan, took the photo:
"We thought, 'Wouldn't it be funny if we did a human Elf On A Shelf?,'" Joe explains. "It kind of took off from there."
While Joe and his wife have four kids, they still promise to find the time to take a new picture every day leading up to Christmas. Check out the hilarious (and kinda creepy) photos they've taken so far, thanks to their Facebook.
h/t The Chive
More ideas for Joe and his wife: 20 Horribly Inappropriate Ways To Pose Your Child's Elf On A Shelf
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The 10 Best Horror Movies Of 2015
There was quite a bit of horror that hit the theaters in 2015, but it wasn't pretty at all. After countless disappointments, even the most mundane story felt compelling. Thankfully, there were a few gems in the mix that salvaged a year plagued with remakes and unnecessary sequels. Here are the ten horror movies that stood out the most in 2015.
10. Creep
![best horror movies 2015, best horror films 2015, creep]()
"Creep" is by no means an instant classic that's going to haunt you for years and years as you watch it every Halloween, but it's original and, for the most part, entertaining. The story does drag a bit and after the 9000th jump scare it starts to lose its effect, but it's worth checking out for no other reason than it's done on a budget so small you couldn't even get Bruce Willis to smell the script for that amount.
9. Goodnight Mommy
![best horror movies 2015, best horror films 2015, goodnight mommy]()
There's an eerie, atmospheric feel to "Goodnight Mommy" and it manages to keep things interesting for quite a while. The final twist isn't quite as shocking as you'd hope and it does take a sharp turn into torture porn in the third act, but if you can get past that, there's a decent movie in here.
8. It Follows
![best horror movies 2015, best horror films 2015, it follows]()
The first time I watched "It Follows," I didn't mind it. The second time, I was absolutely furious. The problem is that it's a good movie that should have been great. I know so many people that wanted to crown it the next great horror movie, but that's a bit of a stretch. The first hour of the movie is solid. There are some great scares and memorable moments. But everything goes to hell at the pool scene. It's a weird, disjointed and unnecessary scene that throws off nearly everything in the film. I'm completely down with vague endings left to interpretation, but not when they're this abrupt and unsatisfying. That being said, it's shot beautifully with magnificent sound.
7. Maggie
![best horror movies 2015, best horror films 2015, maggie]()
Who would've thought a low-budget zombie film starring Arnold Schwarzenegger would have so much heart? It's a nice turn for him outside of another "The Expendables"-style movie and is definitely the most surprising must-see film of the year. I know you're as tired of zombies as everyone else, but before you go on zombie hiatus, give this one a shot.
6. Insidious: Chapter 3
![best horror movies 2015, best horror films 2015, insidious chapter 3]()
By no means is this installment as strong as the original, but it definitely feels more necessary and coherent than the sequel. Actress Lin Shaye finally gets her character's story told, and because of her charm and likability, it takes a story that might not have been that compelling and turns it into an enjoyable flick with enough scares to satisfy fans.
5. The Visit
![best horror movies 2015, best horror films 2015, the visit]()
While "The Visit" might not have necessarily been terrifying, it's certainly entertaining. The found footage gimmick feels a bit forced at times, but M. Night Shyamalan did a solid job of creating characters we care about.
4. Unfriended
![best horror movies 2015, best horror films 2015, unfriended]()
An entire movie that takes place on the screen of a laptop doesn't exactly sound like a grand slam, but "Unfriended" works to its strengths so well. Many of us live on our laptops anyway, so to have something as familiar as your home screen turned into the setting of a supernatural thriller is quite effective. The only complaint I have about it is the last 30 seconds. You take that moment out and it's such a better movie. Still, it's a great concept that worked out well.
3. Extinction
![best horror movies 2015, best horror films 2015, extinction]()
Oh hey, speaking of small budget zombie movies! "Extinction" is drama first and horror second, but that's not a bad thing at all. Matthew Fox is as great as ever in this microscopic look at the end of the world. If you're looking for a "Dawn of the Dead"-style blood fest, this is not it. It's a story about flawed people trying their best to simply hold it all together. And that's about as relatable as a story can get.
2. The Final Girls
![best horror movies 2015, best horror films 2015, the final girls]()
"The Final Girls" is the one horror movie from this year that you'll watch over and over. It's definitely not dark and terrifying, but it does a great job of toeing the line between comedy and horror without stepping too far in one direction. The cast is fantastic and takes what would have been a good movie and turns it into something great. This is one of the rare times a sequel would be welcomed with open arms.
1. The Gift
![best horror movies 2015, best horror films 2015, the gift]()
Why haven't you seen "The Gift" yet? Sure, it's not a horror movie with a slasher running around gutting teenagers, but it finds a way to get under your skin and sticks with you days after you watch it. Jason Bateman could make any role likable and Joel Edgerton does a masterful job as writer, director and star. Let's hope this is the start of a resurgence of the thriller genre because it has been sorely missed.
10. Creep
"Creep" is by no means an instant classic that's going to haunt you for years and years as you watch it every Halloween, but it's original and, for the most part, entertaining. The story does drag a bit and after the 9000th jump scare it starts to lose its effect, but it's worth checking out for no other reason than it's done on a budget so small you couldn't even get Bruce Willis to smell the script for that amount.
9. Goodnight Mommy
There's an eerie, atmospheric feel to "Goodnight Mommy" and it manages to keep things interesting for quite a while. The final twist isn't quite as shocking as you'd hope and it does take a sharp turn into torture porn in the third act, but if you can get past that, there's a decent movie in here.
8. It Follows
The first time I watched "It Follows," I didn't mind it. The second time, I was absolutely furious. The problem is that it's a good movie that should have been great. I know so many people that wanted to crown it the next great horror movie, but that's a bit of a stretch. The first hour of the movie is solid. There are some great scares and memorable moments. But everything goes to hell at the pool scene. It's a weird, disjointed and unnecessary scene that throws off nearly everything in the film. I'm completely down with vague endings left to interpretation, but not when they're this abrupt and unsatisfying. That being said, it's shot beautifully with magnificent sound.
7. Maggie
Who would've thought a low-budget zombie film starring Arnold Schwarzenegger would have so much heart? It's a nice turn for him outside of another "The Expendables"-style movie and is definitely the most surprising must-see film of the year. I know you're as tired of zombies as everyone else, but before you go on zombie hiatus, give this one a shot.
6. Insidious: Chapter 3
By no means is this installment as strong as the original, but it definitely feels more necessary and coherent than the sequel. Actress Lin Shaye finally gets her character's story told, and because of her charm and likability, it takes a story that might not have been that compelling and turns it into an enjoyable flick with enough scares to satisfy fans.
5. The Visit
While "The Visit" might not have necessarily been terrifying, it's certainly entertaining. The found footage gimmick feels a bit forced at times, but M. Night Shyamalan did a solid job of creating characters we care about.
4. Unfriended
An entire movie that takes place on the screen of a laptop doesn't exactly sound like a grand slam, but "Unfriended" works to its strengths so well. Many of us live on our laptops anyway, so to have something as familiar as your home screen turned into the setting of a supernatural thriller is quite effective. The only complaint I have about it is the last 30 seconds. You take that moment out and it's such a better movie. Still, it's a great concept that worked out well.
3. Extinction
Oh hey, speaking of small budget zombie movies! "Extinction" is drama first and horror second, but that's not a bad thing at all. Matthew Fox is as great as ever in this microscopic look at the end of the world. If you're looking for a "Dawn of the Dead"-style blood fest, this is not it. It's a story about flawed people trying their best to simply hold it all together. And that's about as relatable as a story can get.
2. The Final Girls
"The Final Girls" is the one horror movie from this year that you'll watch over and over. It's definitely not dark and terrifying, but it does a great job of toeing the line between comedy and horror without stepping too far in one direction. The cast is fantastic and takes what would have been a good movie and turns it into something great. This is one of the rare times a sequel would be welcomed with open arms.
1. The Gift
Why haven't you seen "The Gift" yet? Sure, it's not a horror movie with a slasher running around gutting teenagers, but it finds a way to get under your skin and sticks with you days after you watch it. Jason Bateman could make any role likable and Joel Edgerton does a masterful job as writer, director and star. Let's hope this is the start of a resurgence of the thriller genre because it has been sorely missed.
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The Nude Yoga Girl On Instagram Still Hasn't Been Kicked Off Even Though She's Always Naked
While Instagram has super strict anti-nudity guidelines (guidelines that have pissed off quite a few people) one woman has managed to keep her account from being shut down, all while practicing yoga naked.
The 25-year-old woman, who has chosen to remain anonymous, has reeled in over 50K followers and talked about what encouraged her to take the photos:
"I always try to find new ways to express myself. I'm very inspired by yoga and photography, so I wanted to bring the two of them together in a pure way. I also love to write and give people tips for healthier and happier lives," the woman told The Cut.
Take a look at some of this gal's nude photos thanks to her Instagram:
h/t Complex
These gals are super into yoga, too: 33 Sexy Photos Of Hot Girls In Yoga Pants
The 25-year-old woman, who has chosen to remain anonymous, has reeled in over 50K followers and talked about what encouraged her to take the photos:
"I always try to find new ways to express myself. I'm very inspired by yoga and photography, so I wanted to bring the two of them together in a pure way. I also love to write and give people tips for healthier and happier lives," the woman told The Cut.
Take a look at some of this gal's nude photos thanks to her Instagram:
h/t Complex
These gals are super into yoga, too: 33 Sexy Photos Of Hot Girls In Yoga Pants
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Epic Winter Fails: Slips, Dips and Tongue-Sticks
Snow is in the air everywhere you look around. It's also the time of year for epic winter fails, and these sure do take the cake.
Related: Parkour Fails Are The Most Painful Fails
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8 Holiday Animated Specials You Should Watch Besides 'A Charlie Brown Christmas'
"A Charlie Brown Christmas," the iconic holiday TV special, turns 50 this year. While admittedly, it's a perennial holiday classic, there are plenty of other classic animated offerings you can view this holiday season, too. Here's a rundown of our favorites -- some popular, some unsung -- all worthy of a glance on your TV or favorite streaming device this season.
The Simpsons, "Simpsons Roasting On An Open Fire"
![8 Holiday Animated Specials to Watch Besides A Charlie Brown Christmas, the simpsons]()
Wouldn't be an animated specials list without giving a nod to TV's longest running animated family. The first season of The Simpsons is extra biting and dark, so if you're into satire this 1989 holiday episode will hit the best notes. This episode is packed with an effective Christmas-inspired storyline, but is most important if you're a fan of the full series, since it offers the first appearances of many well-known series characters like Mr. Burn's assistant Smithers, Patty and Selma, Principal Seymour Skinner, Ralph Wiggum, and also Homer's well-beloved pooch.
Robot Chicken's Half-Assed Christmas Special
![8 Holiday Animated Specials to Watch Besides A Charlie Brown Christmas, robot chicken]()
Adult Swim (and stop motion animation) fans can appreciate this laugh-out-loud satire of Xmas specials. The magical land of Narnia gets in on the holiday hoopla and a nerd even gets stuffed into a locker as a result. Why you should watch? To see Hermey the Elf epically fail at being a dentist. And to witness Sally hoping for a love note and it not being for Linus. Not your standard Christmas special, which makes me stand out even more.
A Rugrats' Chanukah
![8 Holiday Animated Specials to Watch Besides A Charlie Brown Christmas, rugrats]()
You don't have to light the Menorah to appreciate this holiday classic. "A Rugrats' Chanukah" gives the story of the Maccabean Revolt with Tommy playing Judah, a key event in history remembered during Chanukah. And the kids, including Dil's nerve-wracking cousin Angelica search for the meaning of Chanukah.
Mickey's Christmas Carol
![8 Holiday Animated Specials to Watch Besides A Charlie Brown Christmas, mickey's christmas carol]()
Disney aficionados will like this classic in the Disney holiday TV specials. Scrooge McDuck stars as Ebeneezer Scrooge and Mickey Mouse plays Bob Cratchit in this heartwarming version of the Charles Dickens' holiday classic. I used to watch this ever year on the Disney Channel as a kid and it holds up very well today. Scrooge gets a visit by a couple of creatures who seek money for the poor, and we all get a valuable lesson in sharing and kindness. Great hand-drawn animation as well (yes, there was a time before Pixar).
WIll Vinton's Claymation Christmas Celebration
![8 Holiday Animated Specials to Watch Besides A Charlie Brown Christmas, claymation christmas special]()
Claymation needs love, too. And, hey, who can forget the California Raisins? Dried raisins don't have end up in your holiday desserts, they can belt out a pretty mean R&B-inspired rendition of "Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer," too. The retro factor takes this special over the top. The special is a series of Christmas carol music videos hosted by Rex, a red Tyrannosaurus Jeff Goldblum; and Herb, a lisping stegosaurus.
Boondocks, "A Huey Freeman Christmas"
![8 Holiday Animated Specials to Watch Besides A Charlie Brown Christmas, boondocks, a huey freeman christmas]()
A hilarious Adult Swim spin on "A Charlie Brown Christmas" is offered up on The Boondocks. Huey Freeman takes over complete control of his elementary school's Christmas play, but gets into a conflict with school officials when he wants to portray Jesus as black. Not only do you get Riley getting pissed off about Santa Claus (penning hilarious notes to the North Pole), the show also tackles holiday consumerism and is perfect if you aren't the jolliest one at the Christmas party.
Dr. Seuss' How The Grinch Stole Christmas
![8 Holiday Animated Specials to Watch Besides A Charlie Brown Christmas, how the grinch stole christmas]()
Yes, we all know the film with Jim Carrey, but way before it hit cinemas, Dr. Seuss' beloved 1966 cartoon tale was a perennial TV staple during holiday time. Who can forget seeing a grinning and green Grinch trying to steal the Whovilles' Christmas and the earworm that is "The Grinch Song"? Watching Grinch dressed up as Santa and witnessing his heart grow in the process of all his shenanigans can make even the coldest hearts melt. Sappy, but true.
Animaniacs, "Twaz The Day Before Christmas"
![8 Holiday Animated Specials to Watch Besides A Charlie Brown Christmas, animaniacs]()
'90s retro cartoon fans, rejoice! If you want to feel like a kid again and go back to the days of hypercolor T-shirts and grunge, rewind to this Warner Bros. animated classic. Yakko, Wakko and Dot, along with the full cast -- including Pinky and the Brain -- take on the classic "Night Before Christmas" tale. Its packed with music like "A Charlie Brown Christmas" but is fully engaged in irony and doesn't try to give any karmic, moral lessons like the "Grinch" or "Charlie Brown" Christmases -- which we all need sometimes.
Related: 10 Very Weird Christmas Movies
The Simpsons, "Simpsons Roasting On An Open Fire"
Wouldn't be an animated specials list without giving a nod to TV's longest running animated family. The first season of The Simpsons is extra biting and dark, so if you're into satire this 1989 holiday episode will hit the best notes. This episode is packed with an effective Christmas-inspired storyline, but is most important if you're a fan of the full series, since it offers the first appearances of many well-known series characters like Mr. Burn's assistant Smithers, Patty and Selma, Principal Seymour Skinner, Ralph Wiggum, and also Homer's well-beloved pooch.
Robot Chicken's Half-Assed Christmas Special
Adult Swim (and stop motion animation) fans can appreciate this laugh-out-loud satire of Xmas specials. The magical land of Narnia gets in on the holiday hoopla and a nerd even gets stuffed into a locker as a result. Why you should watch? To see Hermey the Elf epically fail at being a dentist. And to witness Sally hoping for a love note and it not being for Linus. Not your standard Christmas special, which makes me stand out even more.
A Rugrats' Chanukah
You don't have to light the Menorah to appreciate this holiday classic. "A Rugrats' Chanukah" gives the story of the Maccabean Revolt with Tommy playing Judah, a key event in history remembered during Chanukah. And the kids, including Dil's nerve-wracking cousin Angelica search for the meaning of Chanukah.
Mickey's Christmas Carol
Disney aficionados will like this classic in the Disney holiday TV specials. Scrooge McDuck stars as Ebeneezer Scrooge and Mickey Mouse plays Bob Cratchit in this heartwarming version of the Charles Dickens' holiday classic. I used to watch this ever year on the Disney Channel as a kid and it holds up very well today. Scrooge gets a visit by a couple of creatures who seek money for the poor, and we all get a valuable lesson in sharing and kindness. Great hand-drawn animation as well (yes, there was a time before Pixar).
WIll Vinton's Claymation Christmas Celebration
Claymation needs love, too. And, hey, who can forget the California Raisins? Dried raisins don't have end up in your holiday desserts, they can belt out a pretty mean R&B-inspired rendition of "Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer," too. The retro factor takes this special over the top. The special is a series of Christmas carol music videos hosted by Rex, a red Tyrannosaurus Jeff Goldblum; and Herb, a lisping stegosaurus.
Boondocks, "A Huey Freeman Christmas"
A hilarious Adult Swim spin on "A Charlie Brown Christmas" is offered up on The Boondocks. Huey Freeman takes over complete control of his elementary school's Christmas play, but gets into a conflict with school officials when he wants to portray Jesus as black. Not only do you get Riley getting pissed off about Santa Claus (penning hilarious notes to the North Pole), the show also tackles holiday consumerism and is perfect if you aren't the jolliest one at the Christmas party.
Dr. Seuss' How The Grinch Stole Christmas
Yes, we all know the film with Jim Carrey, but way before it hit cinemas, Dr. Seuss' beloved 1966 cartoon tale was a perennial TV staple during holiday time. Who can forget seeing a grinning and green Grinch trying to steal the Whovilles' Christmas and the earworm that is "The Grinch Song"? Watching Grinch dressed up as Santa and witnessing his heart grow in the process of all his shenanigans can make even the coldest hearts melt. Sappy, but true.
Animaniacs, "Twaz The Day Before Christmas"
'90s retro cartoon fans, rejoice! If you want to feel like a kid again and go back to the days of hypercolor T-shirts and grunge, rewind to this Warner Bros. animated classic. Yakko, Wakko and Dot, along with the full cast -- including Pinky and the Brain -- take on the classic "Night Before Christmas" tale. Its packed with music like "A Charlie Brown Christmas" but is fully engaged in irony and doesn't try to give any karmic, moral lessons like the "Grinch" or "Charlie Brown" Christmases -- which we all need sometimes.
Related: 10 Very Weird Christmas Movies
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Navy Guy Gets Rejected For Totally Embarrassing Reason
A guy named Wyatt sold his old iPhone to a friend, but before selling it he made the mistake of not deleting any of his contacts. So logically, Wyatt's friend thought it would be a good move to go through Wyatt's contacts and look for a random hookup because Tinder is so last year. It's all about finding sex using your friend's contacts.
Wyatt's friend got rejected right off the bat, but the reason why wasn't what he was expecting.
![Guy Who Thinks He's Being Rejected Because He's In The Navy]()
![Guy Who Thinks He's Being Rejected Because He's In The Navy]()
![Guy Who Thinks He's Being Rejected Because He's In The Navy]()
Pretty embarrassing, Matt, and you should be ashamed of yourself. But hey, at least you got the obligatory peace sign selfie in.
Via Distractify
Not the smoothest way to handle rejection: This Is Quite Possibly The Most Cringeworthy Reaction To Getting Rejected Through Text Ever
Wyatt's friend got rejected right off the bat, but the reason why wasn't what he was expecting.
Pretty embarrassing, Matt, and you should be ashamed of yourself. But hey, at least you got the obligatory peace sign selfie in.
Via Distractify
Not the smoothest way to handle rejection: This Is Quite Possibly The Most Cringeworthy Reaction To Getting Rejected Through Text Ever
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Bill Burr Showing You How To Make A Pie Crust Might Make You Piss Yourself
Other than when my 90-year-old grandpa craps his pants while singing Christmas carols, Bill Burr might be the funniest person on the planet.
And if you're single this holiday season, haven't done shit with your life and have nothing to bring to the table, Burr has thankfully taken time out of his busy schedule to show you how to make a terrific homemade pie crust that just might be enough to get you back into your family's good graces.
Hell, even if you've got your shit together and your parents love you, it's still worth sitting back and laughing your ass off for almost ten minutes while Burr takes you through the supplies he stole from grandmother because she's weak to finally completing what looks like a pretty sweet pie crust.
h/t Barstool Sports
Iliza Shlesinger will make you wreck your drawers in another way: Stand-Up Comic Iliza Shlesinger Gets Naked For A Selfie
And if you're single this holiday season, haven't done shit with your life and have nothing to bring to the table, Burr has thankfully taken time out of his busy schedule to show you how to make a terrific homemade pie crust that just might be enough to get you back into your family's good graces.
Hell, even if you've got your shit together and your parents love you, it's still worth sitting back and laughing your ass off for almost ten minutes while Burr takes you through the supplies he stole from grandmother because she's weak to finally completing what looks like a pretty sweet pie crust.
h/t Barstool Sports
Iliza Shlesinger will make you wreck your drawers in another way: Stand-Up Comic Iliza Shlesinger Gets Naked For A Selfie
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A 'Back To The Future' Porn Parody Is Finally Here And It Looks Hysterical
Great Scott!
There were several different routes the crew at Wood Rocket could have taken with the time travel classic, but based on what I've seen in the trailer for "Fap to the Future," it looks as though I'm going to be a huge fan of their changes when I get home and check out the finished product.
For starters, the lead character Marty DickFly is now a sexy young lady instead of a dude. Nice. She gets the honor of traveling back in time in Cock Brown's "poontonium-powered sex-time machine" known as "The DickLorean."
There are no Libyans chasing down Cock Brown for stealing their poontonium either. Their replacements? You guessed it: The lesbians.
But perhaps the best difference between "Fap to the Future" and the real thing is that instead of heading to the theaters and dropping 20 bucks to watch it, you can watch the porn parody for free at WoodRocket.com after you check out the trailer below.
Obviously, both the trailer and the full-length parody are NSFW.
h/t BroBible
The Ronda Rousey porn parody is just a tad more erotic: Porn Star Playing Ronda Rousey In Porn Parody Really Wants To Go On A Date With Her
There were several different routes the crew at Wood Rocket could have taken with the time travel classic, but based on what I've seen in the trailer for "Fap to the Future," it looks as though I'm going to be a huge fan of their changes when I get home and check out the finished product.
For starters, the lead character Marty DickFly is now a sexy young lady instead of a dude. Nice. She gets the honor of traveling back in time in Cock Brown's "poontonium-powered sex-time machine" known as "The DickLorean."
There are no Libyans chasing down Cock Brown for stealing their poontonium either. Their replacements? You guessed it: The lesbians.
But perhaps the best difference between "Fap to the Future" and the real thing is that instead of heading to the theaters and dropping 20 bucks to watch it, you can watch the porn parody for free at WoodRocket.com after you check out the trailer below.
Obviously, both the trailer and the full-length parody are NSFW.
h/t BroBible
The Ronda Rousey porn parody is just a tad more erotic: Porn Star Playing Ronda Rousey In Porn Parody Really Wants To Go On A Date With Her
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81-Year-Old Woman Who Ran Beer Mile Said She Would Have Run Faster With Scotch
When my grandma was 80 years old, the only way she would have finished a race is if somebody would have pushed her the entire way.
This is pretty much the exact opposite.
According to UPI, an 81-year-old woman who recently needed less than 21 minutes to complete the 2015 FloTrack Beer Mile World Championships in Austin said she would have run a lot faster if the beer would have been replaced by scotch.
![81-Year-Old Woman Who Ran Beer Mile Said She Would Have Run Faster With Scotch]()
At 81 years of age, Elvira "Vera" Montes of El Paso was the race's oldest competitor, yet she needed just 20 minutes and 24 seconds to finish, besting her 47-year-old daughter Renee by almost a full minute.
"I'm not a big beer drinker," Montes said after the race that required participants to chug a 12-ounce beer before every quarter-mile. "I like beer when the weather is real hot and there's nothing else to drink. I'm really a scotch drinker, Chivas if it's available. If it was scotch we were drinking instead of beer, I would have run a lot faster."
And it's official: I'm now in love with an 81-year-old woman.
We're not sure this guy even made it one mile after he stole a beer truck: Georgia Man With Last Name 'Miller' Steals Beer Truck, Gets Run Over By Beer Truck
This is pretty much the exact opposite.
According to UPI, an 81-year-old woman who recently needed less than 21 minutes to complete the 2015 FloTrack Beer Mile World Championships in Austin said she would have run a lot faster if the beer would have been replaced by scotch.
At 81 years of age, Elvira "Vera" Montes of El Paso was the race's oldest competitor, yet she needed just 20 minutes and 24 seconds to finish, besting her 47-year-old daughter Renee by almost a full minute.
"I'm not a big beer drinker," Montes said after the race that required participants to chug a 12-ounce beer before every quarter-mile. "I like beer when the weather is real hot and there's nothing else to drink. I'm really a scotch drinker, Chivas if it's available. If it was scotch we were drinking instead of beer, I would have run a lot faster."
And it's official: I'm now in love with an 81-year-old woman.
We're not sure this guy even made it one mile after he stole a beer truck: Georgia Man With Last Name 'Miller' Steals Beer Truck, Gets Run Over By Beer Truck
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Manchester Police Remove Suspect's Mugshot From The Internet After Everyone Roasts Him
Well, it's his fault for looking so hilarious.
The Greater Manchester Police put suspect's Caylan Clossick's mugshot on Facebook with hopes that the Internet would help them find the 18-year-old who is connected to a burglary. But things didn't exactly go as planned as people instead roasted the hell out of Clossick because of his extremely large ears.
![Police Remove Suspect's Mugshot From The Internet After Everyone Roasts Him]()
You would think he'd be easy to spot.
Because of the incessant roasting, the GMP went ahead and informed everyone that they wouldn't be needing the public's help anymore.
The comments below are just a small taste of why the GMP made that decision:
![Police Remove Suspect's Mugshot From The Internet After Everyone Roasts Him]()
![Police Remove Suspect's Mugshot From The Internet After Everyone Roasts Him]()
Well, everyone is talking about him now so I guess posting his mugshot did work.
Via Complex
The thought of prison is hilarious to this guy: How About This Mugshot Of A Guy Who Was Busted With 70 Mushroom Plants In His Room
The Greater Manchester Police put suspect's Caylan Clossick's mugshot on Facebook with hopes that the Internet would help them find the 18-year-old who is connected to a burglary. But things didn't exactly go as planned as people instead roasted the hell out of Clossick because of his extremely large ears.
You would think he'd be easy to spot.
Because of the incessant roasting, the GMP went ahead and informed everyone that they wouldn't be needing the public's help anymore.
Due to the exceptional coverage of our wanted post for Caylan Clossick, we have decided to remove the post. We believe...
Posted by GMP Wigan East on Thursday, December 10, 2015
The comments below are just a small taste of why the GMP made that decision:
Well, everyone is talking about him now so I guess posting his mugshot did work.
Via Complex
The thought of prison is hilarious to this guy: How About This Mugshot Of A Guy Who Was Busted With 70 Mushroom Plants In His Room
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There's Something A Little Off About This Abandoned California Motel
At first glance, this photo posted to Reddit several days ago looks like nothing more than your average abandoned motel. If anything, it's in better shape than most. But then you decide to zoom a little closer.
Yeah, probably best to just keep driving. Then again, the description helps to put the seemingly gruesome scene into perspective:
"I shot an old fenced off motel in the ghost town of Amboy, CA. I noticed later that one room looks to have blood spatter on the walls."
Wait a second, that explains nothing! In fact, it's even more horrifying now. On top of that, most of the comments on the picture are to the effect of, "I live not far from here and all the stories about this place are creepy as hell." So what in the world is up with this motel of nightmares?
Enter Metro News, who point out that while the town of Amboy (located in the Mojave desert along Route 66) has indeed been virtually abandoned since the early 1970s when Interstate 40 moved in on its turf, the motel itself was the location of several movie shoots including the 1986 thriller "The Hitcher." So the most logical explanation is that one of those films simply left some fake blood behind on one of the windows. But this is the Internet, after all. Who wants to be logical?
Related: The 10 Best Horror Movies Of 2015
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Today's Funny Photos
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Weird Sex Advice People Have Gotten From Their Friends
Many guys have that one friend who gives novel advice about getting it on. For instance, the craziest positions to do the Funky Panda Dance. Speaking of which, a guy who refers to sex as the Funky Panda Dance rightfully deserves the side-eye.
That said, here's the quirkiest, strangest and oddest sex advice ever dished out by friends through the Whisper app. How many of you have heard these tips before?
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
![Weirdest Sex Advice Given By Friends]()
Don't lie. One of these has been recommended to you.
Via Whisper
Related: These Are The Most Messed Up Sibling Confessions
That said, here's the quirkiest, strangest and oddest sex advice ever dished out by friends through the Whisper app. How many of you have heard these tips before?
Don't lie. One of these has been recommended to you.
Via Whisper
Related: These Are The Most Messed Up Sibling Confessions
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Then And Now: The Cast Of 'Empire Records' 20 Years Later
Of all the movies celebrating their 20th anniversary in 2015, this has to be one of favorites, as it is both a nostalgic reminder of the good ol' days and a cult classic comedy to boot. What is the cast of "Empire Records" up to now, you ask? Well, we'll tell you.
Anthony LaRaglia (Joe Reaves)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
The store manager we all wish we had in our coming-of-age jobs has kept busy since the days of "Empire Records" with steady work in lesser known films, a little bit of TV work and voiceovers in the "Happy Feet" films. None of this compares to his killer pissed-off drum solo though.
Liv Tyler (Corey Mason)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
She's only gotten bigger as time as passed, as this hot Hollywood daughter has been a lukewarm babe in "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy - one of the greatest trilogies actually - and a number of lukewarm films like "The Ledge" and "The Incredible Hulk." But right now, she's as hot as she's ever been, playing a bad girl role on HBO's "The Leftovers."
Renée Zellweger (Gina)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
Besides an unrecognizable makeover of plastic surgery, little has been seen of Zellweger, who, after "Empire," has popped up with more from the "Bridget Jones's Diary" after peaking with films like "Jerry Maguire," "Me, Myself & Irene" and "Cinderella Man."
Robin Tunney (Debra)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
She might've been a shaved head and suicidal in the upbeat "Empire Records," but despite keeping her darkness going in '90s films like "The Craft," Tunney has actually turned a corner and became one of the hot babes on TV on "The Mentalist."
Ethan Embry (Mark)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
Right after his success in "Empire Records," Embry went on to be Rusty Griswold in "Vegas Vacation" and be in the '90s heartthrob films, "Disturbing Behavior" and "Can't Hardly Wait." But since then it has been a myriad of TV work, including "Dragnet," "Grace & Frankie" and a recent guest spot as the idiot resident on "The Walking Dead" season six premiere.
Rory Cochrane (Lucas)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
He made a name for himself as the hippie stoner in 1993's "Dazed & Confused," but after "Empire Records," Cochrane's biggest roles were on TV on "The Company," "CSI: Miami" and "24." Then he found himself in "Argo" and a couple Johnny Depp-led gangster films, "Public Enemies" and the recent late 2015 film "Black Mass."
Johnny Whitworth (A.J.)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
Like some of his fellow "Empire" cast mates, Whitworth went on to "Can't Hardly Wait" shortly after and eventually made his way to "CSI: Miami," but his big credits include "NYPD Blue," "The Shield" and "3:10 to Yuma." Now he can be seen on the new series, "Blindspot," as the "ruggedly handsome man" on NBC.
Brendan Sexton III (Warren)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
The film's comedic shoplifter got his start on "Empire Records" but has since made a name for himself in films like "Boys Don't Cry" and "Black Hawk Down" before continuing more steady work, including the recent "Seven Psychopaths" and a role on the Netflix takeover, "The Killing."
James 'Kimo' Wills (Eddie)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
The goofy aloof haystack hair man, Eddie, who also got his start on "Dazed & Confused" hasn't been thoroughly busy since 1995, popping into a couple handfuls of film and TV spots, including "White Oleander" and "The Independent" - there's a lot of overlap for these cast mates - and a TV role on "Monk" and "The District."
Maxwell Caulfield (Rex Manning)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
Who doesn't love a little Rex Manning Day? The actor has credits dating back as far as nearly 40 years, but since "Empire Records," he's mostly been a face for TV, starring in spots for "All My Children," "La Femme Nikita" and "Casualty" to name a few.
Debi Mazar (Jane)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
The "Goodfellas" actress also starred in "Beethoven's 2nd" before landing as Rex Manning's manager in "Empire Records," so in a way she'd already peaked prior to the film. But since then she's gone on to important roles like Vince's publicist on "Entourage," along with the role as Two-Face's right-hand girl, Spice, in "Batman Forever," which also happens to be a film celebrating its 20th anniversary this year.
Coyote Shivers (Berko)
![Empire Records Cast Now]()
The dark-haired rocker has been relevantly quiet, save for a handful of adult films, including "Smut," "Girl in 3D," "The Boys and Girls Guide to Getting Down" and most recently, "Hollywood Sex Wars." I'm seeing a pattern here, but he's also been credited for the music in some of these masterpieces, so good for you, Shivers.
Anthony LaRaglia (Joe Reaves)
The store manager we all wish we had in our coming-of-age jobs has kept busy since the days of "Empire Records" with steady work in lesser known films, a little bit of TV work and voiceovers in the "Happy Feet" films. None of this compares to his killer pissed-off drum solo though.
Liv Tyler (Corey Mason)
She's only gotten bigger as time as passed, as this hot Hollywood daughter has been a lukewarm babe in "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy - one of the greatest trilogies actually - and a number of lukewarm films like "The Ledge" and "The Incredible Hulk." But right now, she's as hot as she's ever been, playing a bad girl role on HBO's "The Leftovers."
Renée Zellweger (Gina)
Besides an unrecognizable makeover of plastic surgery, little has been seen of Zellweger, who, after "Empire," has popped up with more from the "Bridget Jones's Diary" after peaking with films like "Jerry Maguire," "Me, Myself & Irene" and "Cinderella Man."
Robin Tunney (Debra)
She might've been a shaved head and suicidal in the upbeat "Empire Records," but despite keeping her darkness going in '90s films like "The Craft," Tunney has actually turned a corner and became one of the hot babes on TV on "The Mentalist."
Ethan Embry (Mark)
Right after his success in "Empire Records," Embry went on to be Rusty Griswold in "Vegas Vacation" and be in the '90s heartthrob films, "Disturbing Behavior" and "Can't Hardly Wait." But since then it has been a myriad of TV work, including "Dragnet," "Grace & Frankie" and a recent guest spot as the idiot resident on "The Walking Dead" season six premiere.
Rory Cochrane (Lucas)
He made a name for himself as the hippie stoner in 1993's "Dazed & Confused," but after "Empire Records," Cochrane's biggest roles were on TV on "The Company," "CSI: Miami" and "24." Then he found himself in "Argo" and a couple Johnny Depp-led gangster films, "Public Enemies" and the recent late 2015 film "Black Mass."
Johnny Whitworth (A.J.)
Like some of his fellow "Empire" cast mates, Whitworth went on to "Can't Hardly Wait" shortly after and eventually made his way to "CSI: Miami," but his big credits include "NYPD Blue," "The Shield" and "3:10 to Yuma." Now he can be seen on the new series, "Blindspot," as the "ruggedly handsome man" on NBC.
Brendan Sexton III (Warren)
The film's comedic shoplifter got his start on "Empire Records" but has since made a name for himself in films like "Boys Don't Cry" and "Black Hawk Down" before continuing more steady work, including the recent "Seven Psychopaths" and a role on the Netflix takeover, "The Killing."
James 'Kimo' Wills (Eddie)
The goofy aloof haystack hair man, Eddie, who also got his start on "Dazed & Confused" hasn't been thoroughly busy since 1995, popping into a couple handfuls of film and TV spots, including "White Oleander" and "The Independent" - there's a lot of overlap for these cast mates - and a TV role on "Monk" and "The District."
Maxwell Caulfield (Rex Manning)
Who doesn't love a little Rex Manning Day? The actor has credits dating back as far as nearly 40 years, but since "Empire Records," he's mostly been a face for TV, starring in spots for "All My Children," "La Femme Nikita" and "Casualty" to name a few.
Debi Mazar (Jane)
The "Goodfellas" actress also starred in "Beethoven's 2nd" before landing as Rex Manning's manager in "Empire Records," so in a way she'd already peaked prior to the film. But since then she's gone on to important roles like Vince's publicist on "Entourage," along with the role as Two-Face's right-hand girl, Spice, in "Batman Forever," which also happens to be a film celebrating its 20th anniversary this year.
Coyote Shivers (Berko)
The dark-haired rocker has been relevantly quiet, save for a handful of adult films, including "Smut," "Girl in 3D," "The Boys and Girls Guide to Getting Down" and most recently, "Hollywood Sex Wars." I'm seeing a pattern here, but he's also been credited for the music in some of these masterpieces, so good for you, Shivers.
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